Article: Game Thread: Twins v Angels, 7/3 @ 7:10pm CT

[Riverbrian]

We get to celebrate the 4th of July at home with a 3-game series against the Angels. The 4th of July is an American holiday because it celebrates our independence. We are not the only country that has a 4th of July because every country has a 4th of July right after the 3rd of July but we are the only country that celebrates the day by accidently blowing off fingers. July 4th, 1776, we shifted from taxation without representation to what we know today as taxation with representatives who are kind enough to send us form letters when we present an issue of concern. We have come a long way baby! It was July 4th, 1776 that we declared that we would damn well use… inches, feet, miles, pounds and fahrenheit. It was July 4th, 1776 that we declared in one united voice that we don’t have to know what the Duchess of Cambridge is doing today. She wore Gucci yesterday but I don’t have to know about today cuz I’m an American.

If any of you don’t believe the Twins can win the World Series… look to the Revolutionary War for inspiration. Gaining independence was the longest of long shots, yet look what happened… a total of over 75,000 trained British Soldiers, loyalists and hired out Hessians defeated by just four fathers.

Go Twins… the American Revolution shows us all that It can be done!!!

Here are some things to think about:

 

1. Delano – The oldest and largest 4th of July celebration in Minnesota is held in Delano. I understand the marketing power of largest but oldest doesn’t excite me because they ran out of food and beer in 1858… I like my celebrations fresh and fully stocked. Delano is a town of 5,464 people, located 28 miles to the west of Minneapolis or 1,756 miles east of Salem, Oregon. The Kurier Polski is published in Delano every 6 weeks; it is the only Polish Newspaper published in the Midwest. It has a circulation of 1500; of those 1500, only 6 actually understand Polish. Which is better than the 4 who actually understand my game thread opens.

2. Our Twins – The 1st half is officially in the books with the Twins checking in with a 41-40 record. That’s a great performance from the local 9 because it is 37 more wins than anybody expected. The All-Star team rosters were announced last night. No starters for the Twins, Miguel Sano was beaten out by Jose Ramirez in the final moments for starter at 3B. The Twins will have 3 reserve all-stars in Miami with Ervin Santana and Miguel Sano… take a second… think about the physical size of Sano… in consideration of his size… the 3 all-stars joke will be kinda funny… with an emphasis on kinda.

3. The Angels – This team is a lot like the Twins. Not much was expected of the Angels this year and yet they managed to pull into Minneapolis with a 43-43 record and this was done without Mike Trout for a significant amount of time. The last time the Twins and Angels met, it was in Anaheim and I had to stay up until past midnight to watch them. This time the Californians will have to stay up late.

4. Today’s Joe M Conversation:

Montana: This is kind of interesting

Maddon: What?

Montana: It says here that married people live longer than single people.

McCarthy: It’s not true… it just seems longer.

Mauer: I gotta text Maddie and let her know.

Maddon: What are you reading?

Montana: Brides Magazine

McCarthy: No conflict of interest with that pro-marriage article.

Montana: It’s a very reputable publication. There is also a great article on the
next big engagement ring trend… actual carrots instead of carats.

Maddon: Did you just say carrots instead of carrots?

Montana: No… carrots… instead of carets.

Maddon: OK… not carrots… instead of carrots.

Montana: Correct

McCarthy: It says here in Popular Mechanics that 100% of all divorces begin with marriage.

Montana: I can see that

Mauer: I texted Maddie and told her that I’m going to live a long time and it’s all because of her.

Maddon: Did she text back?

Mauer: She told me not to be over-confident just because her last scheme didn’t work.

5. The Magic Fridge – I went to the fridge looking for something to snack on. I took a look inside, there was plenty of food but I didn’t find anything that I wanted. Thirty minutes later… I went back to the fridge and I am reporting that the situation in the fridge did not change. And… and… for complete clarity… I’m telling you all… that I went back to the fridge perhaps an hour after that and again there was no change in the contents of the fridge. I’ve been married for 27 years now and my wife no longer asks why I do such things.
_________________________

Lineups:

ANGELS
Cameron Maybin CF
Kole Calhoun RF
Albert Pujols DH
Yunel Escobar 3B
Andrelton Simmons SS
Martin Maldonado C
Luis Valbuena 1B
Danny Espinosa 2B
Ben Revere LF

Alex Meyer P

TWINS
Joe Mauer 1B
Eduardo Escobar 2B
Miguel Sano 3B
Max Kepler RF
Kennys Vargas DH
Eddie Rosario LF
Jorge Polanco SS
Jason Castro C
Byron Buxton CF

Adalberto Mejia P

Weather: clear, sunny, 81 deg, winds at 9mph from the ESE. Nice!

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[wsnydes]

You know, I've discovered that if you keep checking the contents of the fridge for a long enough period of time things will disappear, things will suddenly appear or things don't change at all.  I think you need to study further Riverbrian.  

[Winston Smith]

Baseball, hot dogs, apple pie and Riverbrian. Happy 3rd of July!

[Blake]

I see RB has been married long enough to where the herd of locusts, AKA "Teenagers," are no longer residing at home. Otherwise, the contents of the refrigerator would be a constantly moving target.

[Vanimal46]

As teenagers, it was always a race between me and my brother for the leftovers in the fridge. As brothers do, we would fight over the last slice of leftover pizza, dessert, etc. 

[Blake]

 

As teenagers, it was always a race between me and my brother for the leftovers in the fridge. As brothers do, we would fight over the last slice of leftover pizza, dessert, etc. 

Brothers? Fight? You mean having brothers isn't all rainbows and unicorns? Knock me over with a feather...

[Craig Arko]

Really interesting picture for this.

[Dantes929]

 

Works with groceries too.

 

[wsnydes]

 

As teenagers, it was always a race between me and my brother for the leftovers in the fridge. As brothers do, we would fight over the last slice of leftover pizza, dessert, etc. 

 

 

Brothers? Fight? You mean having brothers isn't all rainbows and unicorns? Knock me over with a feather...

Yes, this sounds very familiar indeed.  Luckily, as the older sibling, what I lacked in size I made up for in speed and cunning.  

 

What that really means is that I made him take the dog out when we got off of the bus, so I got first dibs on whatever was left in the fridge.

[wsnydes]

Since I won't have a chance later, I just want to wish everyone a safe and happy 4th of July!  I expect everyone to be typing with the same number of digits come Wednesday as they are today!  Have a sober ride home too!

 

Anyone have any cool and/or unusual 4th of July celebration traditions?

[Mike Sixel]

Have a good, safe, US Holiday everyone. Go Twins.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

...

 

The Twins will have 3 reserve all-stars in Miami with Ervin Santana and Miguel Sano… take a second… think about the physical size of Sano… in consideration of his size… the 3 all-stars joke will be kinda funny… with an emphasis on kinda.

 

...

 

 

So let me get this straight... You're saying Miguel Sano isn't just a star, he's a binary star? That may explain why his orbital shots can be erratic at times. And hey, he has two names: a first and a last. Is that just coincidence?

 

With all due respect, i would at least try to change emphasis from kinda to funny.

 

And i will root for him twice as hard. Not that my rooting is much to speak of... Something to do with stony ground...

Edited July 3, 2017 by sampleSizeOfOne

[Oldgoat_MN]

This time the Californians will have to stay up late.

 

Priceless.

[glunn]

 

 

The last time the Twins and Angels met, it was in Anaheim and I had to stay up until past midnight to watch them. This time the Californians will have to stay up late.

 

Good one and great overall setup. I will never think of my refrigerator the same.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

Strange... i keep checkng the game thread, and there is something new to snack upon.

 

Vantage number 1. I couldn't have done that with a mere smear ice box.

[jimmer]

I have found that most of the things I like to snack on don't reside in the fridge, but rather the pantry.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

Alex Meyer...

 

Now that's a name i haven't heard in a long time...

[wsnydes]

Dozier scratched tonight. Anyone have the scoop on that? He was originally in the lineup I believe.

 

Edit: sore back apparently.

Edited July 3, 2017 by wsnydes

[Blake]

 

I have found that most of the things I like to snack on don't reside in the fridge, but rather the pantry.

Personally, I like to combine bits from the pantry and the refrigerator. 

[PDX Twin]

 

Dozier scratched tonight. Anyone have the scoop on that? He was originally in the lineup I believe.

Edit: sore back apparently.

 

It would be too bad if Dozier has to sit for a while. The guy we're anxious to bring up doesn't play 2b. Although I guess Rosario played there pretty consistently for a couple of years in the lower minors. Anybody want to see his glove in the infield? <Duck>

[Rhino and Compass]

If the Twins are comparable to the American Revolution, I can't wait to see how France comes in to help them Minnesota win the World Series

[jimmer]

 

If the Twins are comparable to the American Revolution, I can't wait to see how France comes in to help them Minnesota win the World Series

Rest assured only when it's a foregone conclusion that the Twins WIN the W Series will France jump in and help...

[wsnydes]

Nice ceremony for Rod Carew before the game.

[David HK]

Wow, Meyer on the mound, and Ben, nice to see some of the old gang.  

 

But, glancing at that Angel lineup-  sheesh, are there any guys they actually drafted there?  I think Calhoun is the only one, the rest they got from other teams.

[yarnivek1972]

Yet again an inning with way too many pitches for Mejia.

[PDX Twin]

 

Yet again an inning with way too many pitches for Mejia.

 

True, but I'll take the zero on the board.

[drock2190]

Vargas comes up empty as expected...

[yarnivek1972]

So, it sounds like Adrianza is coming off the DL tomorrow. For whom remains to be seen. I suppose if the Twins don't burn through the pen tonight, it could be a pitcher. Hildenberger would seem to be the most likely candidate, though hardly deserving.

[yarnivek1972]

8 pitches. Niiiiiiiiice.

[Hosken Bombo Disco]

J O E