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Game Thread: Royals@Twins 10/3 12:05PM

Hrbowski

By Hrbowski
in Archived Game Threads

  

14 members have voted

  1. 1. Who should win the Award for Game Thread Participation?

    • Bark's Lounge
      5
    • USAFChief
      5
    • Glunn
      2
    • Craig Arko
      1
    • LaBombo
      1
    • Circus Boy
      0

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Hrbowski Ft Myers Mighty Mussels

Hrbowski

Verified Member
Posted
Posted

Once upon a time in Twins Territory there were three men who were known as Jeff, Dick, and The Holy, Holy Vicar, but if it was their names that were the reason that they became famous they would have been a boring trio, which was not the case, so let's get started with the story.

 

Jeff was known as a respectable working man with long hair, a large beard, and a pine tree in his front yard that was rotting out at the base. His neighbors didn't exactly like him, due to his loud music and fireworks that he shot off at their houses, but all people have their annoying habits, and that is what makes us so interesting. Jeff didn't always get along with Dick and The Holy, Holy Vicar, but I can say that he wasn't too much of a hot head; although that may be attributed to the fact that he smoked vast quantities of marijuana, which made him crave a delicious, delicious pepperoni pizza. Jeff also taught Sunday School at a megachurch, played the Saxophone, and kept a garden, but we will get to that later. I guess that we can agree that Jeff was an average citizen, and even though he wasn't a good role model for the neighbor boys he was not so awful that they were banned from talking to him.

 

Dick was retired, kinda fat, loud, and just about everything else that men like him are, with a white beard, and a wife. Dick happens to be the most minor character in the story, with his shed actually playing a larger role than he does. Dick was a hunter and fisherman who had taxidermies littering his house, but was better known for making appearances with nothing but his skimpies on in his backyard, and for growing lilacs. Dick was actually a pretty boring guy compared to Jeff, and really boring compared to The Holy, Holy Vicar.

 

The Holy, Holy Vicar was an interesting character who drove a red PT Cruiser, was exceedingly fat, and watched Jaws backwards at high speed, which is why he was able to entice little boys to come over to his house.

 

There once was a very, very holy Vicar
Who was walking along the street one day
When he heard a little voice saying excuse me Vicar
Oh help me Vicar the voice did say

The Vicar looked about but all he could see
Was a tiny little frog sitting on the ground
Oh my dear little froggie did you speak to me
Was it you who spoke when I heard that sound

Oh yes said the frog oh help me Vicar
Cause I am not a frog you see
I'm a choirboy really but a very wicked fairy
Put a nasty spell on me

The only way that I can be saved
From this wicked spell the little frog said
Is for someone to take me and put in a place
Where a very holy man has laid his head

So the Vicar took him and put him on his pillow
And there he lay till the break of day
The very next morning a blessed miracle
The spell was lifted I'm glad to say

For there was a choirboy in bed with the Vicar
And I hope you think this all makes sense
Because my Lord and members of the Jury
Rests the case for the defense

 

That wasn't the worst thing that the Vicar did; he also threw shoes, especially when he was mad and running around the neighbor's fire pit, chasing his dogs, working up a sweat, and listening to loud laughter. One day his dogs broke loose again, tore down the street, and were never seen again.

 

Jeff has become an efficient squirrel and raccoon hunter, but still can't hit the crows, and want's to outlaw oil, Catholics, and the City Council. Dick moved away and took half his lilacs with him. The Holy, Holy Vicar annually performed the last rites for the Twins seasons, but will be unable to this year, due to the fact he went into Dick's shed, and has never come out.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0wMgwW5Oko

 

I'm not sorry if I offended anyone, for it is a 100% true story.

 

Lineups:

 

Alcides Escobar SS

Ben Zobrist 2B

Lorenzo Cain CF

Eric Hosmer 1B

Jonny Gomes DH

Mike Moustakes 3B

Salvador Perez C

Alex Rios RF

Paulo Orlando LF

 

Yordano Ventura P

 

Aaron Hicks CF

Brian Dozier 2B

Joe Mauer 1B

Miguel Sano DH

Trevor Plouffe 3B

Eddie Rosario LF

Torii Hunter RF

Kurt Suzuki C

Eduardo Escobar SS

 

Weather:

 

Sunny, with a high near 58. East wind 10 to 15 mph.

  • Replies 158
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Craig Arko Minnesota Twins

Craig Arko

Old-Timey Member
Posted
Posted

Well if we go down, let's go down fighting.

 

BTW, there are many other names who belong on that list more than mine. If you can edit the poll go ahead and replace me.

Hrbowski Ft Myers Mighty Mussels

Hrbowski

Verified Member
Posted
  • Author
Posted

 

Well if we go down, let's go down fighting.

BTW, there are many other names who belong on that list more than mine. If you can edit the poll go ahead and replace me.

Give me names and I will add them.

Squirrel GOAT

Squirrel

Community Moderator
Posted
Posted

 

Well if we go down, let's go down fighting.

BTW, there are many other names who belong on that list more than mine. If you can edit the poll go ahead and replace me.

I don't think there are 'more' or 'less' in a participant. Just that anyone participates, however much or little, is equally good to anyone else. That's what the game threads are about. But I won't vote for anyone but Brian and he's not on the list, so I won't vote for anyone. :)

mickeymental FCL Twins

mickeymental

Verified Member
Posted
Posted

 

It's not last night any more.

Remember, all, this game is on regular Fox and not FSN.

just wanna say thanks: quite a while back and before all the movie publicity, you tossed out a tip on reading the martian. i put it on hold at the library (when the waiting list was still short) and, after a somewhat reasonable wait, picked it up about a week ago. just finished and now look forward to seeing the movie (in imax, of course).

SwainZag Cedar Rapids Kernels

SwainZag

Community Moderator
Posted
Posted

 

Win today, and we can resume scoreboard watching this evening -- our win plus an Astros loss tonight would make Sunday's game relevant!

 

Agree with this!  Win and put a little pressure on the Astros tonight.  I'd love to see at least a meaningful game on the last day of the season!  

Danchat Minnesota Twins

Danchat

Old-Timey Member
Posted
Posted

I was hoping to see Kepler in the lineup today... but since we're still "technically" in the race, maybe we'll see him tomorrow.

DaveW All-Star

DaveW

Old-Timey Member
Posted
Posted

Win today coupled with a Rangers win today would at least make tonight interesting.

 

It's looking pretty damn bleak, but I guess this is why you play the games!

Puckett34 FCL Twins

Puckett34

Verified Member
Posted
Posted

 

just wanna say thanks: quite a while back and before all the movie publicity, you tossed out a tip on reading the martian. i put it on hold at the library (when the waiting list was still short) and, after a somewhat reasonable wait, picked it up about a week ago. just finished and now look forward to seeing the movie (in imax, of course).

That book is fantastic.  Excited to see in theaters as well.

ashbury GOAT

ashbury

Verified Member
Posted
Posted

That was ugly.  How do you call Zuke with the error there?

Bench calling Tommy Tommy Tommy - Tommy is there, Zuke bumps into his glove arm - I admire this ruling.

 

If this was college hoops (I won't stick my neck out what an NBA ref would call) it would be a two-shot foul, in the act of shooting. :)

ashbury GOAT

ashbury

Verified Member
Posted
Posted

It's not over till its over, although it has gotten late early around here.

We came to that fork in the road last night, and unfortunately we took it.

DaveW All-Star

DaveW

Old-Timey Member
Posted
Posted

 

no tv twins here. watching angels/rangers where they just showed a graphic: twins 2-0, angels 1-1, astros 0-2 = three-way tie ...

In that scenario the Twins really really really need for Texas to win today's game. If Angels win and Astros lose today, Texas clinches the west, which means they will bench everyone for tomorrows game.

First things first, lets get some runs here!

ashbury GOAT

ashbury

Verified Member
Posted
Posted

Slow day on the thread, all must be at the game   ;)

 

COME ON TWINS HIT THE BALL AND SCORE!!!!

Watch that baseball soar!

DaveW All-Star

DaveW

Old-Timey Member
Posted
Posted

I know batting average isn't everything, but Dozier is getting down to a dangerous level, we need him to figure out how to be a .260 or so guy.

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