Game Thread: Twins vs.Tigers 6:40pm cdt 5/23/2022ad

[LVTwinsfan]

8 minutes ago, Danchat said:

I am concerned with the amount of loud contact Archer is giving up...

Keplers was louder

[Drunk_Goose]

I know only the first inning, but this here homemade chicken pie is ready to throw in the oven!

[wsnydes]

4 minutes ago, USAFChief said:

 

literally 1 swcond prior to the GS.

You managed to stay upright this year!  Congrats!

[Shaitan]

These First Round picks are dragging us down. All 3 outs. Obviously this FO needs to go.

[wsnydes]

I guess that's one way to start the game.

[Shaitan]

4 minutes ago, Mill1634 said:

Kepler has 6 homers this year. 4 are against the Tigers.

Further proof we shouldn't miss Bauer.

[Drunk_Goose]

Archer is annoying to watch pitch at times for sure.

[LVTwinsfan]

I keep hoping for the old Archer and keep seeing the older Archer

[bighat]

Has Archer always been such a slow worker? I don't recall this feature before, albeit I haven't been paying attention to most of his starts thusfar.

[Schmoeman5]

Just now, bighat said:

Has Archer always been such a slow worker? I don't recall this feature before, albeit I haven't been paying attention to most of his starts thusfar.

Yes. Always slow with his little foot dance

[CRF]

11 hours ago, Cap'n Piranha said:

 

The Turtles / Flo & Eddie, had some great songs back in my day, which was a long time ago...Happy Together, It Ain't Me Babe, You Baby, She'd Rather Be With Me, She's My Girl, Elenore, You Showed Me...probably more I can't think of right now. Good stuff! 

[USAFChief]

Cameron BA .273

 

...

 

 

SLG .273

 

 

Hahahaha

[LVTwinsfan]

Is it just me or are the Twins unusually slow at turning DP’s

[Cap'n Piranha]

I'd like to see Correa attempt to barehand that ball.  With Cameron's speed (76th percentile), and it being a relatively slow bouncer, you need to go faster to have any hopes of turning that DP.

[Parfigliano]

Im so old I remember when Grossmanwas a Twin

[Mill1634]

https://twitter.com/evanwoodbery/status/1528890392678129665?s=20&t=ajnoZHIXkV-9D7sW-yMIhw

[Drunk_Goose]

Looks like pretty crap attendance at Target again.?

[wsnydes]

3 minutes ago, Parfigliano said:

Im so old I remember when Grossmanwas a Twin

I'm so old that I remember him from BEFORE he was a Twin!

[PseudoSABR]

1 minute ago, Drunk_Goose said:

Looks like pretty crap attendance at Target again.?

It's Monday against the Tigers...

[Cap'n Piranha]

1 minute ago, Drunk_Goose said:

Looks like pretty crap attendance at Target again.?

Must be why the stock tanked.

[Parfigliano]

1 minute ago, Drunk_Goose said:

Looks like pretty crap attendance at Target again.?

Me and wife comin from NM to see in June

[Parfigliano]

2 minutes ago, wsnydes said:

I'm so old that I remember him from BEFORE he was a Twin!

Fossil

[Cap'n Piranha]

2 minutes ago, Parfigliano said:

Fossil

This really should have a paid advertisement tag.

[wsnydes]

3 minutes ago, Parfigliano said:

Fossil

If I'm a fossil, what does that make @USAFChief? ?

[Schmoeman5]

Just now, wsnydes said:

If I'm a fossil, what does that make @USAFChief? ?

Petrified 

[wsnydes]

1 minute ago, Schmoeman5 said:

Petrified 

What's he so scared about?

[Drunk_Goose]

2 minutes ago, wsnydes said:

What's he so scared about?

Their's been rumors that we might be signing Sidney Ponson to a minor league contract

[Cap'n Piranha]

I wish Carlos had struck out there.

[Richie the Rally Goat]

1 hour ago, sampleSizeOfOne said:

"Monday is World Turtle Day"

quoth the the voice over the radio the other night.

 

Thought 1:

Is that every Monday? Or just today?

Thought 2:

Is it Just for World Turtles?

The only one i know  of  is the Great A'Tuin, and tickle me pink if i can't start a discworld flavored game thread.

 

Thought 3:

What other turtles deserve to be mentioned?

The laserdisc turtle.

The one at the beginning of El Mariachi.

Those of the Teenage Mutant variety.

Mr. T in the dialogues of GEB.

Yertle the Turtle

Filbert from Rocco's Modern Life (note for future potential silly game thread intros)

and more...

 

Thought 4:

What ever became of Willians Astudillo?

He may be gone from our line up, but his spirit of play lives on with the Twins!

 

Thought 5:

What does any of this have to do with tonight's game?

Tha'ts easy! It's a game thread.

Read on to find out.

 

 

Turtles of Detroit:

0. Elvin Rodriguez (R) P

1. Robbie Grossman (S) RF

2. Jonathan Schoop (R) 2B

3. Miguel Cabrera (R) DH

4. Javier Baez (R) SS

5. Harold Castro (L) 3B

6. Willi Castro (S) LF

7. Spencer Torkelson (R) 1B

8. Eric Haase (R) C

9. Daz Cameron (R) CF

 

Turtles of Minnesota:

0. Chris Archer (R) P

1. Byron Buxton (R) CF

2. Luis Arraez (L) 1B

3. Carlos Correa (R) SS

4. Jorge Polanco (S) 2B

5. Max Kepler (L) RF

6. Nick Gordon (L) LF

7. Trevor Larnach (L) DH

8. Gio Urshela (R) 3B

9. Ryan Jeffers (R) C

 

It's turtles all the way down.

Every time I take a look inside that old and fabled book

I'm blinded and reminded of the pain caused by some old man in the sky

Marijuana, LSD, psilocybin, and DMT they all changed the way I see

But love's the only thing that ever saved my life

 

So don't waste your mind on nursery rhymes

Or fairy tales of blood and wine

It's turtles all the way down the line

So to each their own til' we go home

To other realms our souls must roam

To and through the myth that we all call space and time.

[Cap'n Piranha]

4 minutes ago, wsnydes said:

What's he so scared about?

Falvine is petitioning Cooperstown to eliminate RBI as an officially recognized statistic.