Game Thread: Twins vs. White Sox 7-30 @ 6:10 PM CT

[Vanimal46]

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view5/3192935/wacky-inflatable-waving-man-o.gif

 

ANNND Welcome! To Minnesota Twins Whine Line: Used Car Lot Edition! I am Vanimal, owner and operator of Minnesota Twins Used Car Lot for the next 2 days. Did you notice the inflatable tube person out front? Great! North, aka twinsnorth, spent 500 Toonies on it...Money well spent. The Minnesota Twins are taking on the Chicago White Sox, as well as hosting an end of July BLOW OUT SALE! Where we're slashing prices on ALL of the old models to make room for more old models. Let's talk about lineups and weather first, before we dive in to the great deals available through Monday.

 

It's going to be a beautiful day in Minneapolis. High of 80 degrees. Chance of rain during the afternoon, but we should be all cleared up by game time. Wind from the SE at 6 MPH.

 

Minnesota Twins (39-63):

 

 

P - Tommy Milone (L) - Didn't make it out of the 5th inning in his last start against the Red Sox.

 

Chicago White Sox (50-53):

 

 

P - Miguel Gonzalez ® - Pretty solid in his last start against the Cubs. 6.2 IP, 7 H, 2 ER, 8 K

 

 

Does your team have bad credit? Is your team bankrupt? NO PROBLEM! We have a saying here at Minnesota Twins Used Car Lot. When other teams tell you no, we put you in a car today! Now let's talk about some cars to drive away today.

 

2007 Suzuki Kurt: This baby has only 9,550 innings on it, and the engine still purrs like a cat! You want to get an instant raise in expendable cash? You can do it with the gas savings you'll see in this ride. We're talking about .775 OPS per gallon, and we've seen a .965 OPS per gallon over the last month. The passenger side window can get stuck sometimes, where others can steal bases at ease.... We're SLASHING the price to 1 intriguing pitcher!

 

2005 Santana Super Sport Edition: Are you looking for a reliable car for your son or daughter to drive around? Well, the Santana Super Sport Edition may be for you! Last year's edition required a recall on their engines for 81 games, but the value has never been higher this year! With only 2,100 innings, there's still plenty of life left in the vehicle. With a 2 year lease, you can drive this car off the lot TODAY! All for the low, low price of a top 100 young player!

 

1984 Kintzler Closer: Yeah, the Kintzler closer may be on the older side, but this model doesn't have any wear and tear on it. This was previously owned by a grandmother who only used the vehicle to drive to church on Sundays and Bingo on Wednesdays. Notice the sinking motion in the leather seats as you step in this puppy. You don't see automobiles built with that kind of sink these days... NO Money Down in order to drive this car off the lot today! We're practically giving this beauty away for a young, intriguing player!

 

2006 Nolasco Hatchback of the Rotation Edition: So you're interested in the Nolasco Hatchback of the Rotation Edition huh? I may be a sleazy car lot owner, but even I wouldn't recommend this disappointing ride. Hell, if you want to drive this car off the lot so it no longer takes space in the parking lot, we'll let you do that! Come on down today to take this thing off our hands!!

 

Used Cars: We've all owned or had primary access to a used car during our driving years, right? Including purchasing a lemon car or two... My first car was a used 1998 Chevy Blazer with 75,000 miles on it. There wasn't much more I could ask for as a teenager being able to drive my own car! Unfortunately it didn't take long for that car to start acting up... The oil started burning up at an alarming rate that required an oil change every 1,500 miles. Body work was required after striking a deer on a country road. Most anything electronic messed up at some point in time during my tenure with the car. What finally did that car in was a broken transmission after 95,000 miles. RIP Silver Slugger... What's your used car experience?

 

We've got so many cars down on the lot I don't even know what to do with them. So drive on down to Minnesota Twins Used Car Lot! Right down the road from the hottest vacation destination in America, Chief's house.

 

Let's go Twins!

[Platoon]

I had heard the '05 Santana's had engine problems. A lot of them were traceable to improper additives placed into the motor system in an attempt to boost power. The only real way to determine the 81 day breakdown was to drain the tank and have it tested intermittently. Some owners thought the trouble and expense not worth the time. On the other hand, some figured the added power was worth the risk. The third category was the owners who said the additives were placed in the tank by an anonymous teenager at the local Shell station, unknown by the owner until one of those unfortunate, and I might add, untimely intermittent tests.

[Platoon]

Btw, the '06 Nolasco interests me, but I was wondering if you would possibly throw in some cash before I left, to cover repairs, towing, and the general embarrassment of owning such a vehicle. Plus is it possible I could pick it up at night, so the neighbors don't see me driving it home? I live in an upscale neighborhood!

[Riverbrian]

 

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view5/3192935/wacky-inflatable-waving-man-o.gif

 

ANNND Welcome! To Minnesota Twins Whine Line: Used Car Lot Edition! I am Vanimal, owner and operator of Minnesota Twins Used Car Lot for the next 2 days. Did you notice the inflatable tube person out front? Great! North, aka twinsnorth, spent 500 Toonies on it...Money well spent. The Minnesota Twins are taking on the Chicago White Sox, as well as hosting an end of July BLOW OUT SALE! Where we're slashing prices on ALL of the old models to make room for more old models. Let's talk about lineups and weather first, before we dive in to the great deals available through Monday.

 

It's going to be a beautiful day in Minneapolis. High of 80 degrees. Chance of rain during the afternoon, but we should be all cleared up by game time. Wind from the SE at 6 MPH.

 

Minnesota Twins (39-63):

 

 

P - Tommy Milone (L) - Didn't make it out of the 5th inning in his last start against the Red Sox.

 

Chicago White Sox (50-53):

 

 

P - Miguel Gonzalez ® - Pretty solid in his last start against the Cubs. 6.2 IP, 7 H, 2 ER, 8 K

 

 

Does your team have bad credit? Is your team bankrupt? NO PROBLEM! We have a saying here at Minnesota Twins Used Car Lot. When other teams tell you no, we put you in a car today! Now let's talk about some cars to drive away today.

 

2007 Suzuki Kurt: This baby has only 9,550 innings on it, and the engine still purrs like a cat! You want to get an instant raise in expendable cash? You can do it with the gas savings you'll see in this ride. We're talking about .775 OPS per gallon, and we've seen a .965 OPS per gallon over the last month. The passenger side window can get stuck sometimes, where others can steal bases at ease.... We're SLASHING the price to 1 intriguing pitcher!

 

2005 Santana Super Sport Edition: Are you looking for a reliable car for your son or daughter to drive around? Well, the Santana Super Sport Edition may be for you! Last year's edition required a recall on their engines for 81 games, but the value has never been higher this year! With only 2,100 innings, there's still plenty of life left in the vehicle. With a 2 year lease, you can drive this car off the lot TODAY! All for the low, low price of a top 100 young player!

 

1984 Kintzler Closer: Yeah, the Kintzler closer may be on the older side, but this model doesn't have any wear and tear on it. This was previously owned by a grandmother who only used the vehicle to drive to church on Sundays and Bingo on Wednesdays. Notice the sinking motion in the leather seats as you step in this puppy. You don't see automobiles built with that kind of sink these days... NO Money Down in order to drive this car off the lot today! We're practically giving this beauty away for a young, intriguing player!

 

2006 Nolasco Hatchback of the Rotation Edition: So you're interested in the Nolasco Hatchback of the Rotation Edition huh? I may be a sleazy car lot owner, but even I wouldn't recommend this disappointing ride. Hell, if you want to drive this car off the lot so it no longer takes space in the parking lot, we'll let you do that! Come on down today to take this thing off our hands!!

 

Used Cars: We've all owned or had primary access to a used car during our driving years, right? Including purchasing a lemon car or two... My first car was a used 1998 Chevy Blazer with 75,000 miles on it. There wasn't much more I could ask for as a teenager being able to drive my own car! Unfortunately it didn't take long for that car to start acting up... The oil started burning up at an alarming rate that required an oil change every 1,500 miles. Body work was required after striking a deer on a country road. Most anything electronic messed up at some point in time during my tenure with the car. What finally did that car in was a broken transmission after 95,000 miles. RIP Silver Slugger... What's your used car experience?

 

We've got so many cars down on the lot I don't even know what to do with them. So drive on down to Minnesota Twins Used Car Lot! Right down the road from the hottest vacation destination in America, Chief's house.

 

Let's go Twins!

 

 

Well Done!!! Bravo

 

[Vanimal46]

Btw, the '06 Nolasco interests me, but I was wondering if you would possibly throw in some cash before I left, to cover repairs, towing, and the general embarrassment of owning such a vehicle. Plus is it possible I could pick it up at night, so the neighbors don't see me driving it home? I live in an upscale neighborhood!

So you want to drive this vehicle off the lot, AND steal money from our cash register?!

 

Let me go speak to our manager, hang tight. Do you need anything while you're waiting? Water? A candy bar?

[Twodogs]

Im in the construction industry and I was wondering if you guys had anything in the area of a Bull Dozier.  I need one to push the dirt around the middle of the infield back at the shop? 

[USAFChief]

I've seen some game threads in my day.

 

But this. Was. AWESOME.

 

I particularly liked the gif of the third base coach attempting to put the stop sign up for Sano.

[Vanimal46]

Im in the construction industry and I was wondering if you guys had anything in the area of a Bull Dozier. I need one to push the dirt around the middle of the infield back at the shop?

You know what? I think we do have a Bull Dozier hanging around somewhere in the lot. It's the only Bull Dozier we have, so you better be paying up for it!

[Blake]

Great job, Sir!

[Platoon]

So you want to drive this vehicle off the lot, AND steal money from our cash register?!

Let me go speak to our manager, hang tight. Do you need anything while you're waiting? Water? A candy bar?

That bit won't work, I have seen Fargo. Anyone knows the Nolasco is taking up space on your 25 car lot, and is never going to be sold. It's either me, or else donate to one of those charities, and take the tax deduction.

[Squirrel]

 

I particularly liked the gif of the third base coach attempting to put the stop sign up for Sano.

Hahaha ... we'll have to come up with a suitable nickname for this ... like, if it had been Ullger, there'd be a windmill gif and we'd call him Windmill, but I can't really see referring to Glynn as 'that inflatable tube person purchased with North's toonies.'

[Blake]

Hmm, this thread is already showing potential to be weirder than the walk-off win last night.

 

And, by the way, what is going on with the Twins bullpen? They've sort of been doing their job lately.

[Platoon]

I am also looking for a used Plouffe? The model year is inconsequential, but I don't want one that is currently in the shop. And don't try and sucker me into paying too much, I know what they are worth. Some dealers try and overvalue a Plouffe, because they look good when you test drive them. But eventually you find out their performance is inconsistent. Some weeks they could run on the Autobahn, and sometimes they could barely make it out of the WalMart parking lot. I also know for a fact your dealership is overloaded with Plouffe replacements, in fact you have several at your storage facility in Rochester as we speak.

[Squirrel]

 

Hmm, this thread is already showing potential to be weirder than the walk-off win last night.

 

And, by the way, what is going on with the Twins bullpen? They've sort of been doing their job lately.

I think it might, might, have something to do with who isn't in it anymore. Possibly?

[Vanimal46]

Btw, the '06 Nolasco interests me, but I was wondering if you would possibly throw in some cash before I left, to cover repairs, towing, and the general embarrassment of owning such a vehicle. Plus is it possible I could pick it up at night, so the neighbors don't see me driving it home? I live in an upscale neighborhood!

Platoon, our manager says you're one of the toughest negotiators we've dealt with. Congratulations, you can take take your cut out of the cash register! Only $13 million, and not a penny more. Will that be enough to get you behind the wheel of that vehicle?

[Blake]

 

I think it might, might, have something to do with who isn't in it anymore. Possibly?

I'll take Jepsen for $2,000,000, Chitown.

[Platoon]

Im in the construction industry and I was wondering if you guys had anything in the area of a Bull Dozier.  I need one to push the dirt around the middle of the infield back at the shop? 

If he doesn't come up with a suitable Bull Dozier, pm me. I have a nice used one for sale. The only problem is in the steering, it constantly pulls to the left. I have tried everything to correct it, and while it will occasionally run straight it refuse to stay there. If you can put up with that quirk and a tendency to completely fall apart about half of every construction season it's good to go. I will be honest, I think it probably looks better than it runs, but the when people drive by and see it, they will be impressed!

[Platoon]

Platoon, our manager says you're one of the toughest negotiators we've dealt with. Congratulations, you can take take your cut out of the cash register! Only $13 million, and not a penny more. Will that be enough to get you behind the wheel of that vehicle?

That's a little short. How about throwing in something like a Kia? Do you have any models made in Korea? I remember you used to have another Asian import, but someone told me you couldn't keep it running properly. I am looking for something with some experience, even if not on American highways. I have no doubt that after a few weeks on our roads, it will be able to catch up to freeway speed!

[Vanimal46]

If he doesn't come up with a suitable Bull Dozier, pm me. I have a nice used one for sale. The only problem is in the steering, it constantly pulls to the left. I have tried everything to correct it, and while it will occasionally run straight it refuse to stay there. If you can put up with that quirk and a tendency to completely fall apart about half of every construction season it's good to go. I will be honest, I think it probably looks better than it runs, but the when people drive by and see it, they will be impressed!

We're expecting TONS of foot traffic at our lot over the next 2 days, Platoon. Who wouldn't want to take advantage of these great deals?

 

You're a natural out there, and the manager is still flustered after you swindled us out of the Nolasco Hatchback of the Rotation Edition.

 

How would you like to be the VP of Sales at Minnesota Twins used car lot?! Sell me a few cars, and I'll show you how to jimmy the vending machine for free chips.

[Platoon]

We're expecting TONS of foot traffic at our lot over the next 2 days, Platoon. Who wouldn't want to take advantage of these great deals?

You're a natural out there, and the manager is still flustered after you swindled us out of the Nolasco Hatchback of the Rotation Edition.

How would you like to be the VP of Sales at Minnesota Twins used car lot?! Sell me a few cars, and I'll show you how to jimmy the vending machine for free chips.

Swindled? I am the one who got robbed! I just tried to flip the Nolasco and found out that no American owner would touch it! Only National owners. Cuts the resale opportunities in half. Apparently there used to be an American owner who would buy vehicles such of the Nolasco ilk, but he recently was terminated from his position. Seems his lot was full of unable to move, previously driven, well used vehicles. His boss was seen running around the lot mumbling "total system failure" and "I didn't see this in any media guides"? It was hard to tell what he meant, he didn't seem to know much about the car business!

[Halsey Hall]

I was looking for that hard top convertable I saw on the lot a couple days ago. Did it sell? Never hesitate when you see your dream car.

[mickeymental]

dang. alls i can afford is this rusty old punto.

[Vanimal46]

I was looking for that hard top convertable I saw on the lot a couple days ago. Did it sell? Never hesitate when you see your dream car.

You talking about the 2010 Nunez Bullet Hemi? Yeah she was a beauty all right. Just sold it a couple of days ago and it's on the way to California.

 

The car had its quirks though. If you put the pedal to the metal, the hard top would fly off the car unexpectedly!

[spinowner]

I realize your newer models are not for sale, but the prototypes you are developing really have my interest. I'm aware that there are a few bugs your engineers are working on, for example they tend to misfire a lot. I know there's one that is designed for speed and a couple more designed for power as well as several general purpose vehicles. You may have a really great product line in a year or two.

[Craig Arko]

I think it might, might, have something to do with who isn't in it anymore. Possibly?

Hey! Hey! Hey!

 

Looking for a replacement for this little beauty:

 

[jimmer]

Pirates trade Melancon to Nats. Looks like Felipe Rivero is the main piece going to Pitt. I imagine more info to come.

[bluechipper]

 

Pirates trade Melancon to Nats. Looks like Felipe Rivero is the main piece going to Pitt. I imagine more info to come.

And Taylor Hearn, who has a 12.3 K/9 in class A. That's a really nice haul for Pittsburgh.

[bluechipper]

Grossman

Mauer

Kepler

Dozier

Suzuki

Escobar

Polanco- DH

Santana- 3rd base 

Buxton

 

That's new... Any time you can give development time in the field to Danny Santana instead of Jorge Polanco, you've got to do it (at least he's playing.) Also, another day off for Sano. smh.

[jimmer]

A lot of the players have had a nice month at the plate.

 

http://www.fangraphs.com/leaders.aspx?pos=all&stats=bat&lg=all&qual=30&type=8&season=2016&month=7&season1=2016&ind=0&team=8&rost=0&age=0&filter=&players=0&sort=16,d

 

Look how well Kepler is doing this month...and he has a .209 BABIP this month.

 

Buxton has a wRC+ of only 75 even though he has a BABIP of .343

[Vanimal46]

 

Grossman

Mauer

Kepler

Dozier

Suzuki

Escobar

Polanco- DH

Santana- 3rd base 

Buxton

 

That's new... Any time you can give development time in the field to Danny Santana instead of Jorge Polanco, you've got to do it (at least he's playing.) Also, another day off for Sano. smh.

 

I'm going to pretend the inflatable tube person is playing 3B today to prevent scratching my head from confusion all afternoon.