Game Thread: Twins @ Athletics, 8/7 @ 9:05pm CT

[Squirrel]

Game-time forecast: Sunny. Winds blowing out to right field at 10-15 m.p.h. Temperature around 65.

 

TWINS:

SP, Pino

 

Santana CF

Dozier 1B

Plouffe 3B

Willingham LF

Vargas DH

Arcia RF

Suzuki C

Colabello 1B

Escobar SS

 

ATHLETICS:

SP, Lester

 

Crisp CF

Jaso DH

Donaldson 3B

Moss LF

Norris C

Reddick RF

Callaspo 2B

Vogt 1B

Sogard SS

 

--------------------------------------

 

And since Brian missed yesterday, he will now give us 10 things to think about!!  A whole whopping 10!!  Woohoo!

---------------------------------------

Gulp... 10!!! I feel like Steve Martin in Roxanne when the guy hits 20 on the dartboard. OK!!! Here we go

 

Things to Think About:

 

1. Oakland -- Oakland is an agricultural community across the bay From San Francisco. Oakland Agriculture is very important in the identity of Oakland. They lead the world in the production of Oaks which are quickly bulldozed down so they can build more rough neighborhoods for crime growth which has become the cities leading export. Oakland contends with a daily fog which is caused by remnants that floated over the bay from the heavy pot smoking in the 60's done by the Grateful Dead and Sly and the Family Stone. The Pointer Sisters hail from Oakland and so did Tom Hanks who was a former member of the Pointer Sisters. Oakland tourism has increased to 2.5 million people every year. Aproximately 1.2 million of them... have been killed  

 

2. The A's -- I really don't want to like the A's... But I can't help it... I do like them. They play baseball the right way. They play it hard... They compete and they have a good time doing it. I can honestly say... I've been entertained nearly every time I watch them... However... They could use some razors... The Beard thing is a little over done. Unless they plan on joining ZZ Top... Just a normal scruffy beard will suffice. Sometimes closeups reveal crumbs of food from the pre-game meal and I've been told that Girls really don't like big beards like that. However... They are probably just jealous because they can't grow them.    

 

3. Billy Beane -- He is a fearless General Manager who has never won the title and he is selling his teams future to go for the title this year. The Acquisition of Jon Lester and Jeff SAH-MAR-JA (I was too lazy to try and figure out how to spell it... besides I have 10 thoughts to complete). Where was I... Oh yeah... The Acquisition of Lester and that other guy... Pretty much announced to everyone on the planet that the A's are going for it. Fearlessly... Beane parted with Cespedes and hot shot prospect Addison Russell to improve that rotation.  The dude has guts.   

 

4. Tom Milone -- A by-product of all this going for it was an excess of pitching and this spit Tom Milone out and the Twins were able to acquire him for Sam Fuld. I still don't understand how that happened but it did. Now I wonder when we will see him pitch for the Twins. After all... his current ERA seems to be an improvement over our current ERA's. 

 

5. Jon Lester -- The Twins Face Jon Lester tonight... Jon is left handed... This means that his right hand has atrophied and he throws like a girl with the normal hand. He's 30 years old and comes from Tacoma Washington. Tacoma is a Czech word that means "Rain on my car after I just washed it". In High School he was named the Gatorade Player of the Year for Washington 2000. He received a life time supply of Gatorade for this accomplishment but it was before they came out with any of the new cool flavors so all he gets is the yellow stuff. He was drafted by the Red Sox in the 2nd Round in 2002 and got a million dollar signing bonus which he quickly spent on any other soft drink that isn't Gatorade. He made his debut with the Red Sox in 2006... That very same year... he was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma which is a form of cancer that is treatable with Gatorade. He has established himself as one of the top pitchers in the game and the Red Sox just moved him to the A's and got Cespedes in return. Lester will be a free agent after the season concludes and will be free to join any club for next season. Cespesdes is not. On the Mound... He Mixes in a curveball on occasion with different varieties of fastballs. One that sinks... One that cuts and one that doesn't do a thing but come in hard and straight.

 

6. Foul Territory -- The A's play in Oakland Alameda County Coliseum... It's isn't a Coliseum exactly... It's more like a thing with seats. Everyone knows that a Colosseum is where Christians face Lions. The only place that happens today is with lost missionaries who took a wrong turn. The Oakland Alameda County Coliseum is now called the O.co Coliseum and this because everything is shortened and combined these days. Miller Genuine Draft is MGD and Bud is now Ba. The unique feature of O.Co is the Miles and Miles of foul territory. The Stadium was designed this way so they could land airplanes in the off season. Which is something that they've never done despite the clever design. As a result... only 7 uncaught foul balls have ever been hit since it opened. The stadium is also built below ground. Only the upper deck is visible from outside and since it's below ground in a giant hole. It can also double as a very large swimming pool. They filled it with water once... hired life guards... but it was over run with Sea Lions... and they attacked the Christians who came to swim... And the battle began... AHH... I see... That's why it was called a Coliseum.    

 

7. Our Twins -- They are our Twins... They can frustrate us... They can thrill us... They can play sloppy... they can play great. They can lose and they can win... But in the end... They are our Twins and they have always been our Twins. My Wife has the exact same thoughts about me and she is watching me less these days.  

 

8. Yohan Pino -- (Setting: Ellis Island)

 

Immigration Official: Next

Immigrant: (Steps Forward while doing an odd looking dance)

Immigration Official: Last Name?

Immigrant: (Turning to the Immigrant behind him) Is there a bathroom... It's been a long boat ride. 

Immigrant behind him: Do you have to Pee?

Immigration Official: (Now Impatient) It's a Long Line... Last name please... Right now. 

Immigrant: (Turning to face the Immigration official while answering the immigrant behind him). Pee? No

Immigration Official: P... I... N... O... Pino... Take this to the medical inspector... Welcome to America... Next!!! 

 

9. Trees -- We don't have many trees in Grand Forks. I looked out my window and noticed a dog running by real fast... Greyhound like speed and I thought that I see this a lot in Grand Forks. The Dogs run full speed and they are extremely fast... Faster then normal dogs. And then it made sense... The Trees are so far apart around here.

 

10. 10 Thoughts??? -- OK... Man UP... You can do this.... You know... I think the last time I had 10 thoughts in a single day... I was 3 sheets to the wind and I told everyone at the party that I had figured out how to solve world peace... all we had to do was stop fighting Man!!! I then let everyone know that I loved each and everyone of them and that was the 2nd thought because I couldn't remember any of their names. The third thought was when I told everyone I was dating Kathy Ireland but I had to break up with her because she kissed like a pez dispenser. The 4th thought was when I showed everyone my tattoo on my butt. I didn't have a tattoo but I did have an ink pen that created one on the spot. The 5th Thought was when I told everyone that I was reincarnated and in a past life... I invented Ravioli. The 6th Thought was really deep... I took a deep breath and explained that it would be awesome if we all got naked so I wasn't the only one. The 7th Thought... I decided to pontificate on the importance of the color Green but I couldn't decide on which shade of Green so that thought didn't last long. The 8th Thought was when I mapped out a strategy for winning the stuffing raisins into your nose contest. I won but it turns out that I was the only participant. The 9th thought was about my lack of hat and that's when I noticed the lamp shade and the Final... 10th thought was... Oh My God... I'm about to pass out.    

[Kwak]

Crisp is the only name (hitters) that I recognize--but doggone they score a lot!  Lester vs Pino--it seems as if the Twins should be spotted some sort "handicap runs" to make the game more competitive--sort of like golf with strokes.

[Mike Sixel]

Is that the same tba in the lineup that is pitching on Saturday? Man, that's impressive.

[Squirrel]

Is that the same tba in the lineup that is pitching on Saturday? Man, that's impressive.

heh ... we haven't had enough threads about yet, have we?  

[stringer bell]

Well, MoneyBall is on the rise along with the A's. They hit well, field well and pitch well. I guess the Twins' best hope is that Lester is off his game, much like Sale was in Chicago. Some guys are swinging pretty well and the fences are tough to reach in night game on the East Bay.

[James]

I have to say, Eric Sogard has some awesome glasses.  

http://www2.pictures.zimbio.com/gi/Eric+Sogard+Oakland+Athletics+Photo+Day+9O_Ohbco_tgl.jpg

[JB_Iowa]

I hate West Coast games.

[Squirrel]

I have to say, Eric Sogard has some awesome glasses.  

http://www2.pictures.zimbio.com/gi/Eric+Sogard+Oakland+Athletics+Photo+Day+9O_Ohbco_tgl.jpg

I have similar frames.  And indeed, they are awesome.  

[D. Hocking]

 

And since Brian missed yesterday, he will now give us 10 things to think about!!  A whole whopping 10!!  Woohoo!

 

I am assuming it is a given that by doubling his work load, it will not affect the quality, lucidity, and the relevance of this thoughts that people have come to expect.

[Mike Sixel]

heh ... we haven't had enough threads about yet, have we?  

 

Wasn't trying to take it there.......was trying to be funny. clearly, I should stick to work today.

[ScrapTheNickname]

I have to say, Eric Sogard has some awesome glasses.  

 

Glasses make the player.

 

 

[Craig Arko]

I hate West Coast games.

I'm good reading about them in the morning.

[Winston Smith]

I'm not sure we are prepared for 10 things by Brian in one night.

[JB_Iowa]

I'm not sure we are prepared for 10 things by Brian in one night.

 

I'm not sure Brian is prepared to tell us 10 things in one night.

[Craig Arko]

I'm not sure Brian is prepared to tell us 10 things in one night.

I'm sure he's smoking the... getting the straight dope on TBD.

[Squirrel]

Wasn't trying to take it there.......was trying to be funny. clearly, I should stick to work today.

I was just trying to be funny back ... 

[Mike Sixel]

I was just trying to be funny back ... 

 

Drained at work, funny meter is way off today. Oh, and I saw Trombone Shorty at the Zoo last night. All these years living here, and I'd never been to a concert there. Great venue. Great act. Tired Mike.

[Craig Arko]

You guys!

 

[sampleSizeOfOne]

Well, with a west coast game, Mr. Brian has more time?  Admittedly, i suppose he could choose to count in a different base and still give us 10 things.  But i guess i'm more curious about what will make the whopping... 

 

Anyway, while i'm less responsive in general than i mean to be, i can perhaps offer a seed thought or two to the cause.

 

Hope Colabello makes some good contact!

[D. Hocking]

I'm not sure we are prepared for 10 things by Brian in one night.

I think there was a Star Trek episode where Spock was given too much great knowledge at once and it drove him to madness.  I would hate for anyone to be driven insane by too much of Brian's wisdom and secrets of the universe.

[Riverbrian]

OK... 10 thoughts are done... I have accepted my deserved punishment for not realizing it was a day game yesterday. 

 

Everyone read them so it wasn't for naught. 

 

I'll join the Game Thread later. 

[Danchat]

I'm happy to see that Vargas has been in the lineup consistently. It's good to see the management trust a young player like him.

 

I'm also wondering who's going to be sent down tomorrow. Colabello will likely be sent down either for a starting pitcher tomorrow or for Mauer on Monday.

[JB_Iowa]

So we get 20 thoughts today (or is it only 19) -- math was never my strong subject.

 

Now you are a couple of days ahead, RB!!

[sampleSizeOfOne]

I think there was a Star Trek episode where Spock was given too much great knowledge at once and it drove him to madness.  I would hate for anyone to be driven insane by too much of Brian's wisdom and secrets of the universe.

 

So how did they save Spock?  I think we should be prepared...

[sampleSizeOfOne]

So we get 20 thoughts today (or is it only 19) -- math was never my strong subject.

 

Now you are a couple of days ahead, RB!!

 

Hard to say.  I think there's such a thing as a compound thought, made up of lot's of little thoughts.

 

Whatever it is.  I'm happy.  And i like the phrase "3 sheets to the wind..." even though i'm too lazy to look up how it got 'bout...

[Riverbrian]

Hard to say.  I think there's such a thing as a compound thought, made up of lot's of little thoughts.

 

Whatever it is.  I'm happy.  And i like the phrase "3 sheets to the wind..." even though i'm too lazy to look up how it got 'bout...

The origin is from sailing.... 4 sheets is good because it's balanced and the ship will sail straight. 3 sheets to the wind is when you try to sail and forget to use a boat.

[teekz]

We get Morris instead of Smalley! I won't be put to sleep with long monolouges!

[stringer bell]

We get Morris instead of Smalley! I won't be put to sleep with long monolouges!

Roy babbles but he does know hitting. Morris knows pitching. I can live with either. After so many years of Bert, I am tired of his act.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

Play ball!

 

And, by my reckoning, for what it's worth, we start out ahead by 10 thoughts!

[James]

10 thoughts... Those were good. Too much thinking though.