Game Thread: Twins @ Tampa 6:10 CDT 9/5/17

[Dave The Dastardly]

What's In A Name?

 

In the best tradition of the Dastardly family, I was in Tampa once.

 

There’s a lot of places that I’ve been once. The key number is “once”. Yeah, okay. I know “once” ain’t a number, but it’s close. I mean you got a “o” an “n” and your basic “e”. Ignore that  “c” for a bit and you got “one”. One’s a number. What the dickens (I have no idea what a “dickens” is but I’m trying to be in a family way here - no, not that kind of family way), if you can call the first day of the month the... wait, I guess I already gave that one up. Okay, if you can call the second day of the month the... crap! Did it again!

 

Let’s just say you get my point about words and numbers and leave it at that.

 

Anyway, the main point is my visits to baseball cities tend to be singular. The implication here is the Dastard becomes persona non grata (that’s Latin for a pain in the derriere - which is French for rear end - which is Gumpian for buttocks) and is forthwith invited to never return upon pain of death.

 

That’s not quite true. I usually get a “if you ever come here and do that again” speech first. Then they go to that pain of death thing.

 

Getting back to Tampa, figuratively, not literally, because there’s that pain of death thing hanging out there, myself, the Little Woman and the Last Born (my son) once traveled to Tampa during one of Minnesota’s cold winters. Yeah, I know. They’re all cold, but this one had been cold enough that every city north of St. Cloud had been abandoned for weeks. So I’d taken a couple weeks vacation, hitched up the sled dogs and the Dastards had gone south to warm up.

 

It was 80 degrees when we arrived in Tampa. But the temperatures plunged to near freezing overnight and it barely managed to climb back into the low 50’s the next day with a windchill south of Antarctica. Wonderful timing on my part. However 50 degrees above zero was still about 80 degrees warmer than it had been when we fled Minnesota.

 

The Floridians, suspicious lot that they are, were in search of a scapegoat, someone to blame for the falling temperatures when the Dastards, totally unaffected by the cooler weather, walked into a restaurant dressed in Twins jerseys and shorts, throats parched... okay, it was my throat that was parched. The Little Woman and the Last Born were merely hungry. Whatever. The Twins jerseys were like targets on our backs.

 

Dressed as we were I was soon engaged in witty repartee with a pair of Rays fans who apparently had arrived with the same affliction as myself but were now well on the way to recovery. We parried, we thrusted (that sounds worse than it really is and not to be confused with thirsted -which was what we really were), the goal for both parties was to score a few linguistic (not to be confused with linguini which was what the Little Woman was after) touche’s while avoiding a fatal stabbing.

 

One thing led to another and I invited the two Rays fans over to our table and plied them with a sociable beer or two, hoping to wheedle an as-of-yet-undiscovered miserly way to take in spring training because my oldest two daughters had already tapped out my life savings for their college educations and with one daughter still in college and of course the Last Born who was already harboring dreams of college life, “Cheap” had become my nom de guerre, oftentimes with “A$$” attached as a surname.

 

I preferred “Frugal”. But what’s in a name?

 

“Don’t go to spring training,” the Rays fans advised. “It's a rip-off. You want to see some good major league baseball, cheap, just come here to St. Petersburg in April and take in a Rays series.”

 

And here all this time I thought St. Petersburg was in Russia. Imagine my shock to discover that the Tampa Bay Rays aren’t in Tampa! But what's in a name? Certainly not a location.

 

“And why, pray tell, would I want to do that?” I inquired with less than diplomatic aplomb. Though I didn’t really say “pray tell” as that might have alienated the Floridians who seemingly required instructions for removing a twist-off cap without chipping their teeth. In truth, since I had already amply quenched my thirst I believe I might have substituted Whiskey Tango Foxtrot for “pray tell”. An error on my part as the Floridians became moderately incensed.

 

Keep in mind these were the days when the Rays had this identity crisis. They weren’t sure if they were still the Devil Rays or just the Rays, you know, like sunshine. Though they still sported a Devil Ray as their logo. I suppose because no one had figured out how to turn a ray of sunshine into a logo. Maybe they should have considered an orange.

 

 

 

 

Anyway, our new friends told me the Rays were lucky to pull in 10,000 fans per game and it wasn’t uncommon to find unwanted tickets laying on the sidewalk outside the stadium come game time. You can’t get baseball tickets any cheaper than that. Unless they mail ‘em to you. You know, like credit card offers.

 

“So you get the spring training feel for nothing, plus motels are much cheaper after all the snowbirds go back north to thaw out their water pipes,” the duo explained.

 

A practical lot these Floridians. Perhaps even kindred spirits.

 

With both the Twins and Rays hoping to earn a wild card spot before the snow flies, I doubt if free tickets will be available for this series, but there’s always a chance my old “new” practical friends could fix this Cheap A$$ up with some nearly-free tickets, you know, because of the wonderful memories we shared together so many years ago. If only I could remember their names... Let see... I believe they were Bud Light and Coors...

 

 

Lesson #179 From the Dastard’s Book of the Painfully Obvious: Sometimes what sticks in our minds isn’t glue.

 

 

The impactful Colon, 6-10 ERA 6.25, takes the mound for the Twins tonight hoping to bind up the Rays while the Rays send out Jake "Smelly" Odorizzi, 7-7, 4.85 ERA, both teams hoping they don't stink up the place.

 

 

So settle back in your favorite chair and grab yourself a screwdriver. A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.

 

 

[USAFChief]

Kudo's, Dave!

[Mike Sixel]

Twins win tonight, no problem. 8-2. book it.

[Dave The Dastardly]

 

Kudo's, Dave!

Thank you, thank you. Thank you very much! Elvis is now leaving the building!

 

But like MacArthur once said, "Why couldn't you have pulled the damn boat all the way up to the beach?" Somehow the press changed that to "I shall return!"

 

Ditto.

[TwinsCD]

I won't be in attendance tonite so a win should almost be a guarantee.

 

I will give credit to the Trop for this much -- it's the only place in MLB where you can park next to the stadium for $15 and then have zero problem getting out of that lot after the game due to the lack of people.  It's probably different when the Yankees and Red Sox come to town but I've never had an easier escape from a stadium parking lot.

[Craig Arko]

Grossman activated, Chagois activated and immediately put on 60 day DL, to clear a 40 man spot for Michael Tonkin to be called up.

 

Mejia and Enns both sent to Chattanooga to continue rehab.

 

No Access, just checking many sources.

[Vanimal46]

 

Grossman activated, Chagois activated and immediately put on 60 day DL, to clear a 40 man spot for Michael Tonkin to be called up.

Mejia and Enns both sent to Chattanooga to continue rehab.

No Access, just checking many sources.

 

Hmm, I would have liked to see Jake Reed get a chance instead of Tonkin getting a 4th chance in Minnesota. Regardless, good luck to Tonkin. 

[TwinsCD]

Tonkin's back in the bullpen?  Whew, that should solve our problems there.

[yarnivek1972]

Grossman activated, Chagois activated and immediately put on 60 day DL, to clear a 40 man spot for Michael Tonkin to be called up.

 

Mejia and Enns both sent to Chattanooga to continue rehab.

 

No Access, just checking many sources.

I've mentioned this before, but if Chargois' agent is smart he would file a grievance to get Chargois pay and service time for the full year. The fact that they take it now would only strengthen that position. He's appeared in one game, which essentially was an attempt at rehab. It is pretty obvious to me that his injury is why he pitched poorly in ST and why he didn't make the team. Now, he's burned an option and we really don't know if he can contribute.

[Danchat]

Would you look at that, Tonkin's back. It is well deserved after he's absolutely torched AAA (1.73 ERA, 13.2 K/9, 1.056 WHIP), and I think it's fair to give him one final chance to stick before they move on from him. Maybe if he pitches better, he can improve the back end of the bullpen. 

 

Grossman is back already? Doesn't it usually take 3-4 weeks to get healthy from a fractured finger? He only spent 18 days on the DL, so I'm not sure if he'll be fully healthy yet. Hopefully they will ease him back in or he might struggle at the plate.

 

Does Chargois to the 60 day DL technically promote him to the majors and give him MLB pay for the rest of September? Either way, it's been a lost year for him, and he'll probably need more AAA time in 2018 before he can sniff the majors again.

[yarnivek1972]

Would you look at that, Tonkin's back. It is well deserved after he's absolutely torched AAA (1.73 ERA, 13.2 K/9, 1.056 WHIP), and I think it's fair to give him one final chance to stick before they move on from him. Maybe if he pitches better, he can improve the back end of the bullpen.

 

Grossman is back already? Doesn't it usually take 3-4 weeks to get healthy from a fractured finger? He only spent 18 days on the DL, so I'm not sure if he'll be fully healthy yet. Hopefully they will ease him back in or he might struggle at the plate.

 

Does Chargois to the 60 day DL technically promote him to the majors and give him MLB pay for the rest of September? Either way, it's been a lost year for him, and he'll probably need more AAA time in 2018 before he can sniff the majors again.

Yes, Chargois will get MLB service time and pay for the balance of the season. Regarding next season, I'm not sure JT has an option left. Making the decision to burn one when he was injured even more curious. I'm not sure if he would qualify for an extra option year.

[diehardtwinsfan]

very enjoyable game thread. Since I'm in Tampa today, I'm going to see if I can find one of those tickets on the sidewalk.  You guys can play "Where's Diehard?"

 

I did some checking online and have to admit that I find it rather annoying that they want to charge me a "delivery fee" for an electronic ticket.

[USAFChief]

 

very enjoyable game thread. Since I'm in Tampa today, I'm going to see if I can find one of those tickets on the sidewalk.  You guys can play "Where's Diehard?"

 

I did some checking online and have to admit that I find it rather annoying that they want to charge me a "delivery fee" for an electronic ticket.

Challenge...accepted.

[TwinsCD]

 

I did some checking online and have to admit that I find it rather annoying that they want to charge me a "delivery fee" for an electronic ticket.

 

Hamsters work hard on that wheel to provide the bandwidth to create that ticket.  The delivery fee pays for their pellets.

[Vanimal46]

 

You guys can play "Where's Diehard?"

 

Here you are, in yellow. 

 

[Vanimal46]

 

 You guys can play "Where's Diehard?"

 

Oh wait, you're coming from Busch Gardens. So you'll probably have your face painted, no?

http://si.wsj.net/public/resources/images/BN-DN390_beer_P_20140702171730.jpg

[TwinsCD]

 

You guys can play "Where's Diehard?"

 

 

You took the Yuengling brewery tour didn't you?  Multiple times, obviously...

 

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/04/19/13/3F60FBE100000578-4424704-It_was_filmed_in_Kilmarnock_East_Ayrshire-a-1_1492604244504.jpg

[diehardtwinsfan]

 

Hamsters work hard on that wheel to provide the bandwidth to create that ticket.  The delivery fee pays for their pellets.

 

yeah, they want $10 for it too. Figured it would be easier to just walk up.

[diehardtwinsfan]

 

You took the Yuengling brewery tour didn't you?  Multiple times, obviously...

 

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/04/19/13/3F60FBE100000578-4424704-It_was_filmed_in_Kilmarnock_East_Ayrshire-a-1_1492604244504.jpg

 

believe it or not, I don't drink beer. Never acquired a taste.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

I hope we win!

 

Oh and Mr. Dastardly, i wanna second Mr. Chief's kudos.

 

Your really have your way with words. Don't think for a moment that it goes unappreciated here.

It doesn't!

 

Oh, and Dickens was this prolific 19th century author. He wrote a bunch, and i bet one or two of his works occasionally appear on English class summer reading lists. So thanks for being educational as well!

[sampleSizeOfOne]

believe it or not, I don't drink beer. Never acquired a taste.

I believe it.

 

I'm tasteless too.

[USAFChief]

 

believe it or not, I don't drink beer. Never acquired a taste.

Well no, not with the straw.  Duh.  Gravity.

[Craig Arko]

Castro and Grossman both in starting lineup.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

Castro and Grossman both in starting lineup.

And there was much rejoicing!

 

Er... to be complete:

 

1. Brian Dozier ( R) 2B

2. Joe Mauer (L) 1B

3. Jorge Polanco (S) SS

4. Eddie Rosario (L) LF

5. Byron Buxton ( R) CF

6. Max Kepler (L) RF

7. Eduardo Escobar (S) 3B

8. Jason Castro (L) C

9. Robbie Grossman (S) DH

 

 

1. Kevin Kiermaier (L) CF

2. Corey Dickerson (L) DH

3. Evan Longoria (R ) 3B

4. Lucas Duda (L) 1B

5. Steven Souza Jr. (R ) RF

6. Brad Miller (L) 2B

7. Wilson Ramos (R ) C

8. Mallex Smith (L) LF

9. Adeiny Hechavarria ( R) SS

[wsnydes]

 

yeah, they want $10 for it too. Figured it would be easier to just walk up.

$10?!  That would buy you two burgers with fries at Ferg's.

[yarnivek1972]

The Twins DH has hit in the 9 spot two of the last three games. But adding a bat wasn't neccessary.

[yarnivek1972]

It will be interesting to see where the Twins decide to slot Sano in the lineup when he returns. He's hit 3rd or 4th pretty much all year.

 

Dozier

Mauer

Polanco

Sano

Rosario

Buxton

Kepler

DH

Castro/Giminez/Garver

 

Perhaps?

[Craig Arko]

It will be interesting to see where the Twins decide to slot Sano in the lineup when he returns. He's hit 3rd or 4th pretty much all year.

Dozier

Mauer

Polanco

Sano

Rosario

Buxton

Kepler

DH

Castro/Giminez/Garver

Perhaps?

Sano will likely be the DH. And won't bat 9th.

[yarnivek1972]

Sano will likely be the DH. And won't bat 9th.

Oh yeah. I seem to remember seeing that was a likely scenario. I believe Adrianza is far better vs rhp and Escobar better vs lhp. I guess I would go straight platoon the rest of the way.

[Jerr]

I found Diehard, glad he got into the game and looks like they have the roof off tonight,didn't know they could do that...learn something new everyday