12 Different Things To Disappoint You This Winter

[RandBalls Stu]

Twins fans have a hole in their lives. With the 2021 season now concluded, they’re no longer spending time or energy being massively disappointed by the hometown nine. Twins Daily offers 12 things that can fill that gap.

1. The Minnesota Vikings. They looked incredible in one game and lost the other three games in unique and frustrating ways. It’s the platonic ideal of four Vikings games and there’s no reason to think it won’t continue.
    
2. The Minnesota Timberwolves. They have a talented young core and are surrounded by front office chaos. They’ve been around for 30 years and been good for about two of them. A safer bet is hard to find.
    
3. The Minnesota Wild. The most playoff-ready team in town. In March, that title was held by the Minnesota Twins. It’s not a crown you want to wear.
    
4. The MLB Postseason. So many enemies of the common good, so few teams to pull for. If you have any friends rooting for the White Sox because they’re from the AL Central, you know they’ve never really been your friend and will try to get you to invest in their MLM someday soon. And yet, you can’t root for the vile, cheating Astros either. No thanks to Atlanta or Boston or LA. The best-case World Series scenario is probably Rays/Giants? Grim. Maybe you can talk yourself into the Brewers, just for having a Wisconsin fan base less insufferable than Green Bay’s? That’s between you and your God.  
    
5. The weather. It’s either going to be too warm to snow and everything is grey and brown, or too cold to enjoy. The worst storm of the season will be on the day you have to drive or fly somewhere. Thankfully, this will only last for 5-7 months. Also the sun is already setting as you read this.
    
6. University of Minnesota athletics. Football team lost to Bowling Green. Men’s basketball team is picked to finish 14th out of 14 teams. They killed the track program. Lindsay Whalen can only do so much.
    
7. New music from your favorite band or singer. It’ll probably be super slow, overly experimental, or have too many horns. This always happens and we don’t talk about it enough.
    
8. The global supply chain. If you’re reading this and haven’t ordered your holiday gifts yet, it’s too late. If you’re reading this and have ordered your holiday gifts, it’s still too late.
    
9. Cutting the cord. Add up the cost of your streaming services. Compare it to your old cable/satellite bill. Remember that none of them carry the Twins or NewsRadio seasons 1-4. Scream into a pillow.
    
10. Minnesota United. They’re fighting for a playoff spot. The supporter groups want to fire the coach. They’ll probably get eliminated on an own goal or forfeit because they’re too injured to field an entire team.
     
11. Free Agency. Remember how hopeful you were when the Twins made those veteran signings last year? Remember how sad you were all summer? Yeah.
     
12. Uncle Gene. Dammit, Gene. 

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[Sousy]

Quote

The Minnesota Wild. The most playoff-ready team in town. In March, that title was held by the Minnesota Twins. It’s not a crown you want to wear.
 

Yup, yup, yup.  This likely won't be the best team BIlly G puts on the ice - things are on an upswing.  A young and (after this preseason) surprisingly deep team might make some noise this year in the playoffs; will only get better as Spurgeon, Dumba, Foligno grow into leadership roles, Ek and Kaprisov solidify their game and young guys (Boldy, Rossi, Beckman) learn theirs.

If you haven't been in on this - now's a good time.  Plus, that Winter Classic in Target Field is a pretty good tie between franchises on other sides of the river.

BONUS: baseball and hockey seasons dovetail almost perfectly.

[Dave The Dastardly]

2 hours ago, Sousy said:

Yup, yup, yup.  This likely won't be the best team BIlly G puts on the ice - things are on an upswing.  A young and (after this preseason) surprisingly deep team might make some noise this year in the playoffs; will only get better as Spurgeon, Dumba, Foligno grow into leadership roles, Ek and Kaprisov solidify their game and young guys (Boldy, Rossi, Beckman) learn theirs.

If you haven't been in on this - now's a good time.  Plus, that Winter Classic in Target Field is a pretty good tie between franchises on other sides of the river.

BONUS: baseball and hockey seasons dovetail almost perfectly.

Sounds like a couple of law firms. What? Now we're going to be sued for jumping off the band wagon and into a snow drift?

[Richie the Rally Goat]

Go Brewers (post season only)!

[ashbury]

13. What a disappointing article!  Each Friday I look forward to a bit of trenchant satire here, and I see now that with RandBalls Stu having been kidnapped and replaced by a swarm of drones it's going to be a long, long winter where I will have to fall back on the creaky old Onion for my LOLs.

 

 

[USAFChief]

"Too many horns"??

 

Unpossible.

[Nine of twelve]

6 hours ago, USAFChief said:

"Too many horns"??

 

Unpossible.

Agree to disagree.

Here's my description of a symphony orchestra: String musicians, auxiliary supporting musicians, and percussionists.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

10 hours ago, USAFChief said:

"Too many horns"??

 

Unpossible.

Concur. 

[sampleSizeOfOne]

On 10/9/2021 at 1:11 PM, USAFChief said:

"Too many horns"??

 

Unpossible.

Unless...

 

[sorney]

Weirdly absent, is any mention of the Sea of Cortez.....

[sampleSizeOfOne]

16 hours ago, sorney said:

Weirdly absent, is any mention of the Sea of Cortez.....

Is that 13 things to be disappointed by?

 

We may have to change the subject line/title of the article...

[John Bonnes]

Whole list is invalid if Collective Bargaining Agreement negotiations isn’t stop it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯