Article: Game Thread: Twins v Royals, 5/23 @ 7:10pm CT

[Riverbrian]

Our Twins are against the wind in many ways and they’ve decided to try running and now crawling against it.

Build a team with Sano, Park, Dozier and Plouffe and listen to the manager talk about creating runs with base path traffic and aggressiveness and you are… against the wind.

Fill your 40 man with youth and refuse to play it and you are… against the wind.

Trying to pull everything while pitchers give you less and less to pull is another example of… against the wind.

The strength of each team in the American League is a hard enough wind to face. This isn’t the light zephyr of the National League.

The lyrics are being re-written… not the Bob Seger Song… but… the one that now goes… “We’re going to WIND Twins”. The Twins will have to try and do something with the next line of the song while they are at it.

Here comes some hot air.

Here are some things to think about:

 

1. The Trade Winds – The Portuguese, I believe, were the first to discover and take advantage of the trade winds of the Atlantic. They learned that it was easiest to head toward Brazil to get to South Africa because it allowed them to keep the wind in their sails instead of traveling against the wind taking a direct route. Come July the Twins will be attempting to take advantage of trade winds and we get to watch Terry Ryan and his skillful handling of his row boat.


2. The Windy City – Yeah I know… we are playing Kansas City tonight but I hate the White Sox so much that I think about them twice a day. Besides… the Windy City moniker fits my narrative. Chicago wasn’t called the Windy City because Chicago is windy. It was called the Windy City because of the hot air being blown by politicians in the 19th Century and then the World Fair came to Chicago in 1893 and the hype reached epic proportions and it cemented the Windy City nickname forever. Nothing to do with actual wind… it had everything to do with the new stuff being displayed in Chicago at the Fair… Cream of Wheat, Juicy Fruit Gum and Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer were introduced to the public for the first time along with items of less importance, the dishwasher and fluorescent light bulbs. The Chicago Fair was also where the world’s first Ferris Wheel was built by Ferris Bueller and his friends Cameron and Sloane while skipping school. The Wheel was an instant hit and Chicago has gone around and around and around without getting anywhere ever since.



3. Kansas City – OK… Enough about Chicago… What about Kansas City? Now that is a place that gets some wind. Kansas City is where warm gulf air collides with cold dry TwinsNorth air and this produces cyclonic cells so strong that lions become cowardly, tinmen become heartless and scarecrows become brainless. If you’ve ever wondered where “We’re not in Kansas anymore” comes from… it is because of these storms. The People of Kansas have been physically blown out of the state eastward until they piled up on the Missouri side. Those who we’re strong enough to withstand the winds and stay rooted have learned to carry on like a wayward son but they realize that they are only dust in the wind regardless.


4. Paragliding – One day a guy was flying a kite and thought to himself… “I’d sure like to be up there”. So he went to his garage… made a bigger kite and attached a lawn chair to it and then he asked his real strong friend to run really fast while towing the unit behind and when the air hit… it became airborne. Eventually… the thing would nosedive into the ground like every kite I’ve ever flown does. While lying in the hospital recovering from his injuries… he had the time to come up with a couple of different ideas. He could jump off a high bridge or a cliff with his device or have it towed behind something motorized. This inventor was the same guy who invented super glue for the single purpose of epoxying his hat to a steel beam so he could hang from it miles above ground.


5. Blowing in from Left: True Story… I think I’ve told this story before but it’s one of my favorites, so forgive me, if you’ve read it before. It must have been around 1994… I don’t exactly remember but there was a High School or Legion Baseball Tournament in East Grand Forks and I was watching my nephew play for Thief River Falls in a game against Fergus Falls. I remember it was an incredibly windy day blowing in from LF and I was sitting with my sister on the top row of one of those 4 row aluminum portable bleachers along the RF line. The concession stand and bathrooms were behind the RF Fence so this meant that a steady stream of people would end up walking behind us throughout the game. A strong gust of wind came through and it blew my hat off my head. It flew directly behind and I immediately jumped off the side of the bleacher to retrieve my hat when I saw it roll toward a guy walking past. The guy picked up the hat and opted to try and Frisbee toss the hat back to me and another gust of wind came and it flew even further away. The guy was nice enough to run after it, grab the hat and walk it back to me this time. I laughed and said “You’ll never make it to the major leagues with an arm like that” the guy smiled and continued on his way.

OK… not that funny so far… right? Well… I had no idea who the guy was… I only said “You’ll never make it to the major leagues with an arm like that because it was a baseball game and because I was trying to be funny after the hat incident because that’s who I am. It wasn’t until he walked back from the concession stand that I really got a look at the guy and realized that I just said that… by total amazing coincidence… to Dave Goltz. Dave had a son who played for Fergus Falls and was there watching.

The odds of me saying that exact line… to an actual major league pitcher while not knowing he was a major league pitcher when I said it… in of all places… East Grand Forks… has to be astronomical. True Story.
____________________

Lineups:

ROYALS
Alcides Escobar(R ) SS
Whit Merrifield(R ) 3B
Lorenzo Cain(R ) CF
Eric Hosmer(L) 1B
Kendrys Morales(S) DH
Salvador Perez(R ) C
Paulo Orlando(R ) RF
Omar Infante(R ) 2B
Jarrod Dyson(L) LF

Ian Kennedy(R ) P

TWINS
Eduardo Nunez(R ) 2B
Joe Mauer(L) 1B
Miguel Sano(R ) RF
Trevor Plouffe(R ) 3B
Byung-ho Park(R ) DH
Robbie Grossman(S) LF
Eduardo Escobar(S) SS
Kurt Suzuki(R ) C
Danny Santana(S) CF

Ricky Nolasco(R ) P

Game-time forecast, according to Weather Underground: With thunderstorms moving in, and an 86% chance of them by game time, and not really tapering off until after midnight ... will we have a game? It's yet to be seen. Forecasts are meant to be wrong and what looks to be brewing may blow another way. Temp will be around 75 deg F, and the winds will be around 12mph coming in from the SSW.

Click here to view the article

[Blake]

What, no head injury this time?

[diehardtwinsfan]

He probably thought it was funny too.

[Riverbrian]

 

What, no head injury this time?

 

I hurt my head when the hat blew off? 

[Riverbrian]

 

He probably thought it was funny too.

 

Yeah... but he probably thought that I knew who he was.

 

If he would have known that I didn't know. He would have laughed all the way back to Fergus Falls. 

[Pardon My Dinger]

I've got four tickets for the game. Primo seats, can't go. Message me if interested.

[Craig Arko]

An opportunity to pimp one of my favorite groups.

 

https://youtu.be/R8x9oNZ7CcI

[Craig Arko]

I hurt my head when the hat blew off?

 

Riverbrian Nunez.

[diehardtwinsfan]

 

 cold dry TwinsNorth

 

 

I think North deserves the right to defend himself.

[diehardtwinsfan]

 

I've got four tickets for the game. Primo seats, can't go. Message me if interested.

 

Well, if you pay me $50, I'll take them off your hands.  Do I need to go to the game?

[twinsnorth49]

 

 

 cold dry TwinsNorth 
 

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-BI671KMTZOE/UpLNVOImw5I/AAAAAAAAC30/9rw4QAPp6VE/s1600/tumblr_m8pde5awY51rno0d4.gif

[twinsnorth49]

 

I've got four tickets for the game. Primo seats, can't go. Message me if interested.

I'll take them.

 

Can someone give me a lift?

[Platoon]

Would questioning whether TR will have both oars in the water, while piloting his rowboat be inappropriate? On a side note, my wife and I tried canoeing with less than moderate success. Let's just say we were the canoeing version of the 2016 Twins with the exception we eventually got our heads above water. On one occasion she yelled "there's a beaver"! Looking to the distance All I saw was a squirrel swimming heroically across the muddy MN. Since both species have two ears and a tail, it was an easy mistake to make. Be that as it may, there has been a long and ongoing "discussion" over who was in charge of steering. The person in front or back. Your answers to this question will determine whether she sees this post or not!

[Platoon]

I'll take them.

 

Can someone give me a lift?

I'll pick you up at Tim Hortons in 30 minutes. You pay for the gas!

[Mike Sixel]

 

Would questioning whether TR will have both oars in the water, while piloting his rowboat be inappropriate? On a side note, my wife and I tried canoeing with less than moderate success. Let's just say we were the canoeing version of the 2016 Twins with the exception we eventually got our heads above water. On one occasion she yelled "there's a beaver"! Looking to the distance All I saw was a squirrel swimming heroically across the muddy MN. Since both species have two ears and a tail, it was an easy mistake to make. Be that as it may, there has been a long and ongoing "discussion" over who was in charge of steering. The person in front or back. Your answers to this question will determine whether she sees this post or not!

 

Ya, first time canoeing with the spouse.....fun times!

 

Usually the person in front suggests the direction, but the person in back is responsible for the steering.....so, front: accountable, back: responsible.

 

that always works so well in corporate.....

[diehardtwinsfan]

 

Would questioning whether TR will have both oars in the water, while piloting his rowboat be inappropriate? On a side note, my wife and I tried canoeing with less than moderate success. Let's just say we were the canoeing version of the 2016 Twins with the exception we eventually got our heads above water. On one occasion she yelled "there's a beaver"! Looking to the distance All I saw was a squirrel swimming heroically across the muddy MN. Since both species have two ears and a tail, it was an easy mistake to make. Be that as it may, there has been a long and ongoing "discussion" over who was in charge of steering. The person in front or back. Your answers to this question will determine whether she sees this post or not!

 

That one went right over your head. 

[twinsnorth49]

 

I'll pick you up at Tim Hortons in 30 minutes. You pay for the gas!

Great......which one?

 

There's 17,000 Tim Hortons in this city.

[Craig Arko]

Ya, first time canoeing with the spouse.....fun times!

 

Usually the person in front suggests the direction, but the person in back is responsible for the steering.....so, front: accountable, back: responsible.

 

that always works so well in corporate.....

Tell me about it...

[Vanimal46]

 

I'll pick you up at Tim Hortons in 30 minutes. You pay for the gas!

Forget Tim Horton's... Meet him at VJ's Drive Inn for the best hot dog in Winnipeg! 

[Platoon]

That one went right over your head.

 

It did, she stepped on the edge of the canoe to get out. I am 6'5 and the water was 7'2"!

[Platoon]

Great......which one?

 

There's 17,000 Tim Hortons in this city.

The one on the SW corner.

[Blake]

 

Forget Tim Horton's... Meet him at VJ's Drive Inn for the best hot dog in Winnipeg! 

if VJ's hasn't been on "Diners, Drive-ins and Dives" it doesn't exist.

[Platoon]

Forget Tim Horton's... Meet him at VJ's Drive Inn for the best hot dog in Winnipeg!

 

I refuse to start another discussion on wieners! Beside me and North are heading straight to the Polish sausage stand. Krysmawhachumacallit, or whatever!

[Vanimal46]

 

if VJ's hasn't been on "Diners, Drive-ins and Dives" it doesn't exist.

Guy Fieri doesn't drive beyond US borders! Overall I'm not impressed with his selection of restaurants for the show, at least in the Austin area. He chose an average BBQ place and an over-rated cafe...

[Pardon My Dinger]

 

I refuse to start another discussion on wieners! 

Huminah huminah huminah huminah huminah...

[Riverbrian]

 

I hurt my head when the hat blew off? 

 

Or better yet... Who do you think invented that original flying chair? 

[Squirrel]

 

Would questioning whether TR will have both oars in the water, while piloting his rowboat be inappropriate? On a side note, my wife and I tried canoeing with less than moderate success. Let's just say we were the canoeing version of the 2016 Twins with the exception we eventually got our heads above water. On one occasion she yelled "there's a beaver"! Looking to the distance All I saw was a squirrel swimming heroically across the muddy MN. Since both species have two ears and a tail, it was an easy mistake to make. Be that as it may, there has been a long and ongoing "discussion" over who was in charge of steering. The person in front or back. Your answers to this question will determine whether she sees this post or not!

The person in the rear of the boat is in charge of steering. However, it's also that person's job to steer to wherever the person in the front wants to go, without question. So ... does that help?

 

Next time skip the canoe and two one-person kayaks.

[Blake]

 

I'll take them.

 

Can someone give me a lift?

Did you try Uber?

[HitInAPinch]

Bob Seger and the Twins?  In the same article?  That is soooo not right....

[Riverbrian]

 

That one went right over your head. 

 

Yeah... Especially if she saw a Beaver.