Chuck Klostermann's HYPERtheticals

[Vanimal46]

 

Damn you Vanimal ... it would be you drawing me out of a posting hiatus which was supposed to be much longer. And what a heck of a time I had getting back into my account, too.

 

But y'know, I know exactly what I'd do. I wouldn't say I'm by any means attractive, but as ChiTown mentioned, the mere fact that I'm a woman does wonders to attract attention from the wrong people, people I'd rather do without. D:

 

So I'll take $1,000,000 from the aforementioned wizard, live with the unattractiveness, send myself and all six of my siblings to our colleges of choice, and donate the rest.

 

And then rub it in to said wizard that I'd gotten the better part of the deal. :3

 

---

 

Oh gosh, I better add my response to the first question too before Van tells me I have to. Um ... I'll watch the movie since I've obviously already experienced a first hand version of the bootlegged footage of myself, and since I also have access to the opinions on the documentary of my closest friends and family, I'll easily be able to find out what ya'll had to say about me. I mean, if ChiTown was one of those people, I'm not sure I'd want to know what her brutally honest take on me was, but then again, that's my own fault. But with the movie, rather than be uncomfortable and embarrassed, I could pick it apart and point out all the inaccuracies.

She's alive! Good to hear from you again always. You missed National Cheese Lover's Day not too long ago. Hope you celebrated in style. 

[Vanimal46]

So we ended up with 3 votes for less than $1, 1 vote for $500, 2 for 4 figures, and always who would rob the wizard at wand-point.....

For me, I'm 25, still casually dating, with no intentions of getting married for the next 5 years. I'm also in a sales role for my profession. You better believe I'm dropping major coin for this once in a lifetime opportunity!! I'd say see you in a few years to my down payment on a house, I'm giving that wizard $20k and letting him do work. 

[Mike Sixel]

 

So we ended up with 3 votes for less than $1, 1 vote for $500, 2 for 4 figures, and always who would rob the wizard at wand-point.....

For me, I'm 25, still casually dating, with no intentions of getting married for the next 5 years. I'm also in a sales role for my profession. You better believe I'm dropping major coin for this once in a lifetime opportunity!! I'd say see you in a few years to my down payment on a house, I'm giving that wizard $20k and letting him do work. 

 

Excellent economic decision. Pretty* sales people make more money

 

*women or men

[Vanimal46]

Today's question...

The Countdown:

 

You are presented with a strange challenge: someone dares you to count backward from 300 to 0. If you succeed at this simple request, you will be given $250,000 in cash. However, if you misspeak (or even stutter), get any digit incorrect, or make any mistake whatsoever, you will immediately be doused with gasoline and burned alive.

Do you dare attempt this challenge?

[Craig Arko]

Where do you come up with these things?

 

No, I can think of better reasons to become a Buddhist monk.

[Mike Sixel]

 

Today's question...

The Countdown:

 

You are presented with a strange challenge: someone dares you to count backward from 300 to 0. If you succeed at this simple request, you will be given $250,000 in cash. However, if you misspeak (or even stutter), get any digit incorrect, or make any mistake whatsoever, you will immediately be doused with gasoline and burned alive.

Do you dare attempt this challenge?

 

No, that's stupid. Who bets their life for a measly 250K?  And no, $1MM isn't enough either.

[Vanimal46]

 

Where do you come up with these things?

 

No, I can think of better reasons to become a Buddhist monk.

It's from the card game HYPERtheticals: 50 Questions for Insane Conversations created by Chuck Klostermann. 

[Vanimal46]

Today's question may be a bust, because counting down backwards from 300 is nearly impossible. 

[USMCTwin]

Well. I'm an accountant so at first thought I was thinking heck yeah I'll do this.  I've got 3 kids under 4 years old so that would take care of their college funds.  Then I tried to run through and do it in my head and got stumped 3 or 4 times before I made it to 250 and quit out of embarrassment/frustration. I'm not sure if having a 2 week old baby letting me sleep very little is the cause of my bad judgment in thinking I could do it or if lack of said sleep is causing me to not be able to count backwards like my life depended on it. Either way, I'm pretty sure my wife would be widowed and my kids fatherless. I'm glad you posed this question that way if someone offers in the future I'll at least hesitate before accepting.

[Squirrel]

No.

[TheLeviathan]

Easy money, sure.

[Vanimal46]

We've got one taker! I'll grab the gasoline, the money, and a camera crew. See you in a few Levi.

[Craig Arko]

300 bottles of beer on the wall,

300 bottles of beer.

 

You take one down and pass it around,

 

299 bottles of beer on the wall...

[Vanimal46]

I'll choose better questions for next week as this one was a bust. 

My answer is hell no would I do this challenge. Even if I took my sweet time thinking about every.single.number I just said, I know I'd screw up before I say the number 225. 

[twinsnorth49]

I hate the smell of gasoline..

[Craig Arko]

I hate the smell of gasoline..

Bet you knew this was coming.

 

[Squirrel]

 

Bet you knew this was coming.

That was my first thought, but didn't post it because I still haven't been able to watch that movie through.

[nicksaviking]

That was my first thought, but didn't post it because I still haven't been able to watch that movie through.

Well if you had to turn it off when they graphically slaughtered the cow, you almost made it.

[Craig Arko]

That was my first thought, but didn't post it because I still haven't been able to watch that movie through.

It certainly doesn't compare to The Martian as a comedy.

[Vanimal46]

Happy Monday. Hope everyone enjoyed the Super Bowl. The game was pretty blah, the commercials were also meh, so hopefully you had some good food to eat. 

I think I chose a good one for today, but we'll find out.

[Vanimal46]

Forever 75

You celebrate your 75th birthday in good health. As far as you can tell, you are a spry, relatively normal 75-year-old. And this condition does not seem to change over time: When you celebrate your 80th birthday, you look and feel exactly as you did on your 75th. When you hit 90, you still look and feel 75. On your 100th birthday, you realize that most of your friends are now dead or dying -- but physically, you are the same independent person you were 25 years ago. You hit age 110 with the same results. Every year, you are celebrating a new birthday without physically evolving beyond the age of 75. Doctors have no explanation for this inexplicable stasis.
 

At what age do the thoughts of immortality pop into your head? How old would you have to be before you would start to seriously believe that you are immortal?

[Mike Sixel]

Pretty much right away around 80 or 85. But, I have an active imagination. I'd start to believe it around 90 I think.

[Vanimal46]

I wonder if after a while instead of feeling like 75 all the time, you wished that you were feeling even younger, like 55-60. It's kind of a cruel joke to be immortal, and look/feel like you're 75 years old all the time. 

[TheLeviathan]

I think I'd feel it at 100.

[Craig Arko]

The big tip-off would be when the guys with swords shouting "There can be only one!" turn up.

 

Since I probably lose that fight I don't think I make it much past 80.

[Squirrel]

 

The big tip-off would be when the guys with swords shouting "There can be only one!" turn up.

 

Since I probably lose that fight I don't think I make it much past 80.

omg ... this gave me the biggest laugh so far today! hahahaha ... I envision a TD event ... I think I'll stay away from that one.

 

To answer the question, I think at some point I do a Maude and that will be that. Not sure at what point I do that, but I don't think I'd want to keep outliving everyone. Maybe ... 110?

[Mike Sixel]

And, I'd keep living forever, assuming your brain stays in shape. After many, many years, I imagine I would want to die, but there would always be something to do, learn, see.....

[Vanimal46]

 

omg ... this gave me the biggest laugh so far today! hahahaha ... I envision a TD event ... I think I'll stay away from that one.

 

To answer the question, I think at some point I do a Maude and that will be that. Not sure at what point I do that, but I don't think I'd want to keep outliving everyone. Maybe ... 110?

That's....kind of depressing. Wouldn't you be curious to learn and see how everything evolves in the future? It would suck to lose friends and family as you continue to live on, but as long as you're a healthy 75 year old mind and body, wouldn't you want to see what life is like in 2100?

[Squirrel]

 

That's....kind of depressing. Wouldn't you be curious to learn and see how everything evolves in the future? It would suck to lose friends and family as you continue to live on, but as long as you're a healthy 75 year old mind and body, wouldn't you want to see what life is like in 2100?

If there is life in 2100. Personally, I'm not sure what kind of world will be left by then, so, no ... I don't want to find out.

[Craig Arko]

Were I to find myself actually immortal the notion of interstellar travel suddenly becomes intriguing. Kepler 425b here I come.