Twins Introduce the Monster Energy Harmon Killerbrew Experience, Other Changes

[RandBalls Stu]

“If we’ve learned anything from the tech and entertainment industry, it's that alienating your customers and making things gradually worse is the space we want to play in.”

Image courtesy of Unsplash/Emmanuel Edwards

In the wake of the Minnesota Twins removing longtime TV play-by-play man Dick Bremer from the broadcast booth, there were concerns that the team might further disrupt their operations and upset diehard fans.

The team sought to allay those concerns on Thursday and said any further moves would only be in the best interest of the team and its supporters, including their plans to update the Target Field statues of Twins Hall of Famers.

“We think a refresh on the Target Field experience is one worth exploring,” said Twins president Dave St. Peter. “People like the Harmon Killebrew statue, but they’ll love the new Monster Energy Harmon Killerbrew Experience.”

Per St. Peter, the new monument will feature the late Twins slugger clad in Monster Energy’s neon green-and-black colors. Rather than swinging a bat, he’ll be riding a BMX bike in an abandoned swimming pool. As a sign of respect to the game, the statue’s ear gauges will be miniature baseballs with the Monster logo.

Killebrew’s statue isn’t the only one getting overhauled.

“Rod Carew’s greatness can’t be captured by a single sculpture, which is why we’re reimagining the concept,” said St. Peter.

Although he didn’t say what this would entail, a source close to the front office said that they would smelt the Carew statue down and craft the molten heap into limited edition Carew Rods, which Champions Club season ticket holders could purchase as an add-on.

“Think about how often you need a rod to prop a window open, or bash something real good,” said the source. “Now you can do all that and more with a limited-edition commemorative rod that used to be a statue of a beloved Twin.”

While plans for the other monuments haven’t been announced, the Star Tribune’s Phil Miller reports that Tony Oliva’s will be replaced by a living statue that is the actual Tony Oliva. The existing statue will be retrofitted to become MMA/YouTube celebrity Jake Paul in an attempt to grow the game with both Gen Z and guys who yell at their girlfriends in Buffalo Wild Wings parking lots.

“If we’ve learned anything from the tech and entertainment industry, it’s that alienating your customers and making things gradually worse is the space to play in,” said one source.

“Also, you can only pay for hot dogs with Bitcoin now.”

 

Image license here.

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[Johnny Ringo]

The Twins beat you to this punch Stu when they inducted Dan Gladden into the Twins Hall of Fame. His outstanding career accomplishments include having the same lifetime WAR as Nick Punto. (Sadly this is not a joke.) 

People were amazed at "Dazzle's" bravery in showing up at the event as there had been some pretty nasty threats from those punks over at Webster's Dictionary. 

But he didn't scuffle. He went up there whompin'.  

[BobAzar]

An inanimate carbon Rod, you say?

[Teflon]

I also read that the Twins have made a sponsorship deal to heavily feature the K-A-R-S Cars for Kids jingle between innings.

[saviking]

People think Dick Bremer resigned but my read is the decision was made for Dick and he showed his unseal class .. But the more I think about it I'm very disappointed. I see no reason to move Dick out of the box. 

The Twins need to be very, very careful who they pick to replace Dick or this could really backfire. The MOVE was a monster move and from this article it sounds like the Twins are already gating blowback. 

I would gladly sign a bring Dick back petition ..

[Jocko87]

Wait'll they get ahold of the broadcast booth. Amiright? @Riverbrian 

[LanceJS]

3 hours ago, saviking said:

People think Dick Bremer resigned but my read is the decision was made for Dick and he showed his unseal class .. But the more I think about it I'm very disappointed. I see no reason to move Dick out of the box. 

The Twins need to be very, very careful who they pick to replace Dick or this could really backfire. The MOVE was a monster move and from this article it sounds like the Twins are already gating blowback. 

I would gladly sign a bring Dick back petition ..

I’m glad I’m not the only one who didn’t think was a mutual decision. I am wondering if the need to negotiate a new TV deal has anything to do with this - new network, new announcers?

[adamsa804]

Carew Rods. It took me 2 seconds and then I burst out laughing.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

About time they took my bit coin!

 

How much sausage do i get for two bits?

[FossSellsKeys]

On 11/3/2023 at 6:33 AM, Johnny Ringo said:

The Twins beat you to this punch Stu when they inducted Dan Gladden into the Twins Hall of Fame. His outstanding career accomplishments include having the same lifetime WAR as Nick Punto. (Sadly this is not a joke.) 

People were amazed at "Dazzle's" bravery in showing up at the event as there had been some pretty nasty threats from those punks over at Webster's Dictionary. 

But he didn't scuffle. He went up there whompin'.  

Dan Gladdens only those who cannot speak the language any better than he can. They are few in number, fewer in brain cells, but numerous in hygienic diseases and parasites. I love baseball on the radio, but I have to turn it off whenever Danny is near the mic. What a waste of the FCCs precious airwaves.