Blow your Mind (For the non-religious)

[TheLeviathan]

Aw...hell, for you religious folks too.

 

But holy crap I can't get over the bears story and it only gets better!

[PseudoSABR]

I wonder what responses "what is the most messed-up thing in the Bible" would elicit.  These verses are supposed to be "funny."

[formerly33]

 

I wonder what responses "what is the most messed-up thing in the Bible" would elicit.  These verses are supposed to be "funny."

Lot: "I can't believe you'd even dream of committing such a sinful act as homosexuality. Thankfully, I have two daughters who have never had sex ... you can go ahead and rape them all you want. But leave these guys alone because they're under the protection of my roof."

 

Geez, was that one messed up dude.

[TheLeviathan]

If you want to really have fun....google people trying to justify these. My favorite: God didn't kill those kids with bears, he just let them die to teach them a lesson.

[nicksaviking]

I'm sure it goes without saying considering the topic, but let's do everything we can to keep this lighthearted, not accusatory.

[diehardtwinsfan]

 

If you want to really have fun....google people trying to justify these. My favorite: God didn't kill those kids with bears, he just let them die to teach them a lesson.

 

Sometimes things get lost in the translation, but if this is the story I think you're talking about, the implication from the text was that this wasn't just a bunch of kids making fun of the guy, they had every intent of doing him harm. 

[diehardtwinsfan]

 

Lot: "I can't believe you'd even dream of committing such a sinful act as homosexuality. Thankfully, I have two daughters who have never had sex ... you can go ahead and rape them all you want. But leave these guys alone because they're under the protection of my roof."

 

Geez, was that one messed up dude.

yeah... Lott... not really a standup guy. 

[TheLeviathan]

 

Sometimes things get lost in the translation, but if this is the story I think you're talking about, the implication from the text was that this wasn't just a bunch of kids making fun of the guy, they had every intent of doing him harm. 

 

Still....bears?  You couldn't, I don't know, tie them in ropes?  Two angry momma bears was the only way to solve that problem?

[diehardtwinsfan]

 

Still....bears?  You couldn't, I don't know, tie them in ropes?  Two angry momma bears was the only way to solve that problem?

 

I'm guessing he couldn't, hence needing the help in the first place.  I'm sure there were plenty of ways to solve the problem, and it really doesn't matter how it was solved, you'll second guess it regardless, because that all you're really interested in doing. 

 

 

[Willihammer]

Elisha:

http://assets.dose.com/image/upload/v1452562547/prod/images/dd3e46b8a5554c0baf56cdfced42aa69.jpg

[TheLeviathan]

 

I'm guessing he couldn't, hence needing the help in the first place.  I'm sure there were plenty of ways to solve the problem, and it really doesn't matter how it was solved, you'll second guess it regardless, because that all you're really interested in doing. 

 

He didn't do it....God did.  So, there wasn't anything that "couldn't" be done.  And of course I'm going to second guess that - a dispute ended up with a guy unleashing two angry momma bears on people.  

 

I mean....cmon!  This is what happens when you believe it is the literal word of God and not identify things as exaggerations and parables instead.

[PseudoSABR]

A lot of the old biblical stories are about obedience to god and his believers and the privileges of reverence.  Not all religious parables are about morality per se; they often take the form of very practical concerns such as maintaining their ranks, by demonstrating what happens to those who don't believe and the protections for those who do believe.   

 

Would an all knowing God really need to test the faith of people? No, but if people believe that they must prove up their faith or face God's wrath, they become a lot more invested in that faith.

 

I mean it's really jarring the nature of the old testament vis-a-vis Jesus' actual teachings....

[Craig Arko]

Understanding > joke-making.

 

https://monoskop.org/File:Harris_Marvin_Cows_Pigs_Wars_and_Witches_The_Riddles_of_Culture_1974.pdf

 

Not that I'd buy everything Harris is selling. Still, it's thought provoking instead of judgemental.

[TheLeviathan]

I have no problem with religion, I love to talk philosophy and religion with religious believers who try to keep the Bible (or whatever holy text) in context.  I often find their ideas much mroe interesting than atheists in fact.

 

But I guess these would be my litmus tests....do you scoff at these and the ridiculous notion of the Bible being the direct word of God?  Yes?  Hey, then let's talk, it could be interesting.  After all, Jesus is one of our best moral philosophers.

[nicksaviking]

 

A lot of the old biblical stories are about obedience to god and his believers and the privileges of reverence.  Not all religious parables are about morality per se; they often take the form of very practical concerns

 

Yes such as I suspect is the case with things like not eating shellfish or pork. People were probably getting sick but didn't understand what was making them sick so they kept eating it because, YUM! An intelligent member of the group understood what was going on but the only way he knows how to get them to stop eating this sickening food is to say, "Hey guys, God said we can't do this anymore".