Twins and Phillies Set to Play Vampire Baseball Game Saturday Night

RandBalls Stu · August 14

Image courtesy of Summit Entertainment

Hoping to build on both the goodwill generated by and fan response to this year’s Field of Dreams game, MLB announced that Saturday’s Twins/Phillies game would be played in Forks, Washington, home of the vampire baseball scene in the 2008 film Twilight.

“Field of Dreams is a generational touchstone for so many baseball fans,” said MLB commissioner Rob Manfred. “And the same can be said for the story of Bella and her immortal vampire lover Edward in Twilight. The fact that a game of baseball is foundational to her acceptance into Edward’s family of fellow sparkly vampires makes this an ideal sequel to our game in Dyersville.”

The game was originally slated to be played at Target Field. Anyone with tickets to the game will have them honored if they make the trek to the remote Washington town.

“We understand it’s a bit of a haul from the Twin Cities to Forks,” said a source in the Commissioner’s office. “And there obviously aren’t any direct flights. What we’re hoping is that people will hop in the minivan for a fun weekend road trip with the family to share the beauty of baseball. I don’t really drive. Gas is still cheap, right?”

When told that it’s actually quite expensive at this time and that there might be some age gap discourse given that Bella is 18 while Edward is 108, the source pointed out the window and said there was a beautiful baby bird. No such bird was observed, and when this reporter turned back around, the source was gone.

Team sources say the Twins and Phillies will be wearing old-timey uniforms like the vampires do in the Twilight scene. The players will be allowed to add as much sparkly glitter to their skin as they are comfortable with.

While many MLB greats replicate the Field of Dreams scene where legends enter the diamond from the adjacent corn field, It’s not known how they would be utilized in a Twilight-themed game. At least one Hall of Famer is skeptical.

“Vampires are pretty scary,” said Twins great Joe Mauer. “And if they’re sparkly? No way, Jose. Real rough stuff.”

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