I was out for a walk this morning, and up ahead, I saw a man on the bridge who was climbing onto a railing and looked like he was going to jump into the Mississippi River. Very awkward but tense situation, and I knew I had to do something. “What are you doing?” I shouted, but he didn’t answer. I picked up my pace and caught up to him. “Nice day, eh?” “Doesn’t matter anymore,” he said, and swung his leg over the rail. An awful pause followed. I felt terrified and had no idea what to do. Out of instinct, I blurted out, “how about them Twins? Sure are terrible this year.” Still no reaction from the guy, but he did stop moving, and just sat on the railing, looking out at the river. I noticed that he did chuckle. Then I heard him whisper, “yeah they are terrible.” Maybe this was my opening! I said, “Baldelli has made mistakes, but I can’t lay it all on him. The bullpen has been awful.” The man thought about it, and nodded. “The bullpen is awful,” he said. “Yes! The bullpen is truly awful,” I said. A rush of energy surged through me. I seized on this. I asked him, “do you think Baldelli has mismanaged the bullpen, or did the front office not give him the pieces?” “The front office did not give him the pieces,” he said. “Yes!” I said, and asked, “Do you think we should trade or DFA Colomé, or keep him in low leverage situations until he gets straightened out?” “Keep him in low leverage situations until he gets straightened out,” the man said. “Yes, me too!” I said, and asked, “do you think it’s too late or can the season be fixed?” “The season can be fixed,” he said. “Yes, I agree!” I said, and asked, “do you think we should keep calling up journeyman veterans like Derek Law, or call up some good young starting prospects to pitch out of relief?” “Call up some good young starting prospects to pitch out of relief,” he said, smiling. “Yes! Me as well!” I said. “We should go watch the Twins game today,” he said. “Yes, let’s go watch the Twins game today!” I said. “Come on down from that railing!” The man who had been so ready to jump off the bridge asked if I could help him back down onto the sidewalk. Seriously an amazing moment. But then he said something about trading Buxton, trading Buxton, and honestly I just have no patience for that sort of thing and I pushed him into the river after all. Maybe I should have asked him what he meant, if he was serious or joking? Not sure (h/t emo philips)