Minnesota Twins Relegated to International League After Embarrassing Secret Loss to St. Paul Saints

After the Minnesota Twins lost their first four games of the season, they hoped to get a mood boost from a quick scrimmage against their own Triple-A affiliate. Instead, they lost that, too. They were relegated to the International League and will play the remainder of the season at CHS Field. As a reward for beating the big-league club, the St. Paul Saints will play the remainder of the 2025 season at Target Field and take over the Twins' remaining schedule.

Commissioner Rob Manfred organized the face-off after the Twins were blanked by Martín Pérez and the lowly Chicago White Sox. Sources suggest that Twins players were caught off-guard when their gear was loaded on the team bus and they were shuttled to the Fosco Park neighborhood instead of their motel off Michigan Avenue. The game was secretly played at the home field of the Kekambas, with minimal fanfare and no cameras. Fortunately, Jefferson Albert Tibbs still resides in the area and shared the game from his perspective.

Tibbs reported that Simeon Woods Richardson and Zebby Matthews, two guys who just recently battled to anchor the rotation, went head-to-head in the matchup. After an immaculate inning from Matthews in the top of the first, Woods Richardson struggled to record outs. Austin Martin, on his revenge tour, led off with a bunt base hit and afterward looked into the Twins’ dugout screaming “ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE” like he just won an NBA championship. Top prospects Luke Keaschall and Emmanuel Rodríguez followed with back-to-back home runs, making it 3-0 Saints early.

Woods Richardson mostly settled in thereafter, but Matthews remained dominant. Tibbs, who spent most of the game trying to guess what "Zebby" was short for, was impressed with the 25-year-old.

“I don't know what that dude throws, but striking out 10 hitters and remaining perfect after five innings is hella impressive,” he said. "But I guess they must have had five dudes who are even better."

It was at that moment things truly went awry for the Twins. Woods Richardson, who was approaching the 80-pitch mark at the end of five frames, didn't leave the dugout for the top of the sixth.

“Yo Coach! Sup with Sim?” Tibbs recalled shouting to manager Rocco Baldelli. Before Baldelli could share his philosophy on pitch counts, though, Tibbs saw Jorge Alcalá headed to the mound in relief. For the second straight appearance, Alcalá failed to record an out—this time, against the seventh through ninth hitters in the Saints lineup. Cole Sands was called on to face the top of the lineup with the bases loaded, but the murderer's row of Martin-Keaschall-Rodriguez continued to make a case for the big-league club. Facing an 8-0 deficit, it was up to the Twins offense to mount a comeback in the final innings of the game.

“If there’s one thing I remember from Coach O'Neil, it's that they need to choke up on the bat and swing down on the ball like your chopping wood”, said Tibbs. “These hacks are going up there swinging for the fences and it isn't working. Put the ball in play!”

Wise or otherwise, these words fell on deaf ears, as Matthews continued to mow down hitters. After eight perfect innings and 84 pitches, Saints manager Toby Gardenhire shouted to the Twins’ dugout “Hey, Rocco! Check this out!” and sent Matthews back to the mound, all but guaranteeing he would throw more than 90 pitches in the game. Naturally, Baldelli countered with a trio of pinch-hitters. Naturally, those pinch-hitters went three up, three down, locking in Matthews’s perfect game and a victory for the Saints. It was barely more dominant than the White Sox's trampling of the hapless Twins earlier Monday, but it was enough to prompt a swap of one team with a long history in the majors with one who currently seems more deserving of being there.

"They sure as hell aren't goin' to the ship," Tibbs put it, bluntly.