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Ryan Costello Dead

Twins Minor League Talk Today, 12:10 AM
Article:   https://www.nzherald...jectid=12286274   He was in New Zealand preparing to play for the Auckland Tuatara in the Aus...

Front Page: Offseason Blueprint: Bet the Farm

Minnesota Twins Talk Yesterday, 11:07 PM
As much as I would like to design my offseason blueprint around the Twins pushing all of their chips into the middle of the table and upp...

Sign Yasmani Grandal, be open to trading Nelson Cruz if M...

Minnesota Twins Talk Yesterday, 10:49 PM
Mitch Garver had a tremendous home run rate in 2019. If he is anything close in 2020 to the hitter he was in 2019, the Twins' have a spec...

NYT Lists MiLB Teams Targeted For Extinctio

Twins Minor League Talk Yesterday, 10:15 PM
Emily Waldon Tweeted out a link to a New York Times article that lists the 42 minor league teams that have been targeted for extinction b...

Front Page: Offseason Blueprint: Spending Every Penny

Minnesota Twins Talk Yesterday, 06:18 PM
Jim Pohlad has had it up to here with you people. After checking his burner twitter account (@matthew_btwins) and once again seeing someo...

Photo

Twins Admit "Engelb Vielma" Is Not A Real Person

Posted by Jon Marthaler , 23 February 2017 · 2,256 views

irreverence
Thursday, the Twins officially announced what many had suspected all along: "Engelb Vielma," supposedly a light-hitting middle-infielder from Venezuela, is actually a fictional creation, a la Sidd Finch.

"Frankly, we were surprised that our joke went on so long," said Twins spokesman Dustin Morse. "It seemed obvious that it was a prank, especially when we put it out that his middle name was 'Stalin,' but in the internet age, people just assumed that he was a prospect and didn't question it."

Vielma, whose name was created by scrambling the letters in "Level Beaming," the title of a feature on Rob Antony's new car, supposedly batted a combined .265 across High-A and AA last season. With the Twins' dearth of shortstop options, some wondered if Vielma could potentially provide some much-needed depth.

"I think people just wanted to believe," said Antony. "After things with Levi Michael went south, people just needed something to grab onto."

When asked about the status of Ehire Adrianza, whose name is an anagram for "Zanier Airhead," or Wander Javier ("A Redrawn Jive"), Antony only grinned cryptically and said, "Hope is definitely around the corner for Twins fans."

  • LimestoneBaggy, Oldgoat_MN, TheLeviathan and 4 others like this



Thanks for the laugh!!

That was splendid!

Thank you.

 

Um, Alex Kirilloff is real though, isn't he?