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The Great Hambino

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Everything posted by The Great Hambino

  1. The Great Hambino
    Pro tip for those looking to take advantage of the $2 pregame brewskis: Many of the lines have you grab them from a cooler while you wait in line before checking out, so be prepared to be standing in line while holding cold cans of beer. As you might have heard, it was chilly at the game, and they frown upon you drinking your beer before you pay for it, so be prepared to come with a hand-warming solution, uh, in hand. Luckily for us, they were handing out these convenient knit beer satchels to the first 10,000 fans in attendance. A bunch of the uncultured rubes in attendance made fools of themselves by putting these satchels on their heads, but it became immediately obvious that there true value lies in the ability to use it to hold your beers while you wait in line so you don't freeze your fingers. But they're not gonna be handing those out every game, so come prepared. Or you can buy a coozie for six bucks. They're not worth three beers, but to each their own.
  2. The Great Hambino
    I cannot believe that is true, but it is. That's wild to me
  3. The Great Hambino
    Gray’s homer cleared the wall at its apex. That thing was a laser. If you’re gonna slog through a cold wet miserable afternoon, might as well win. Hopefully Buxton isn’t too bad
  4. The Great Hambino
    You’re not wrong
  5. The Great Hambino
    Power just went out at the park. Definitely not a metaphor whatsoever
  6. The Great Hambino
    Full disclosure, I thought it was implied that I was showing 5-year-old me’s thoughts, and it might not have been as clear as it was in my head
  7. The Great Hambino
    Nah, pretty sure it's Monday. I know my days of the week Of course I'm being ironic - it's a game thread
  8. The Great Hambino
    When I was a kid, it was always confusing to me why Good Friday was called Good Friday. Like, they killed him. How is that good? I would also get thrown off by Monday Thursday
  9. The Great Hambino
    Some of the hidden value of Caratini is that because of his presence on the roster, Bell hasn't yet made an appearance in the field. So far exclusively he's been a DH. There will come a time when that's no longer true, and I think we'll have a greater appreciation of Caratini's competent 1B play at that time. Plus, I think his real value is as the bridge C between Jeffers and Tait/the next bridge to Tait, depending on his development. It's not a coincidence that he's the only new guy brought in with a guarantee for next year And if he starts to take off above expectations, he could be the inspiration of some avant-garde custom cocktails at the bars in the park. Do I want a carrot-infused martini? Probably not! But I'd give it a try anyway
  10. The Great Hambino
    Isbel doesn't exactly have a cannon
  11. The Great Hambino
  12. The Great Hambino
    JFC Clemens, look who's crawling down the line Edit: Don't mean to absolve Lewis, take your time with the throw for the same reason
  13. The Great Hambino
    Glad to see Taj out for the sixth. Steal innings away from the bullpen wherever you can
  14. The Great Hambino
    Buxton taketh, Buxton get takeneth away
  15. The Great Hambino
    This is a fun game. Mark Teixeira is the all-time leader in this category for me
  16. The Great Hambino
    Perkins suggested the same on the TV broadcast
  17. The Great Hambino
    Those poor CF camera guys look like they're on Deadliest Catch
  18. The Great Hambino
    I'd like to see Martin get an opportunity to lead off against some RH pitching. I'm sure he'll take some lumps, but Kody Clemens: leadoff hitter is not a super high bar to clear
  19. The Great Hambino
  20. The Great Hambino
    Challenging a pitch in a blowout in the 8th should get you suspended
  21. The Great Hambino
    Wallner is lost
  22. The Great Hambino
    This is day 1 of 15 in a row. It's either a position player or make Kent wear it on the way back to St Paul
  23. The Great Hambino
    At least they make a boatload of outs on the bases
  24. The Great Hambino
    As we all know, it doesn't rain in rural areas and small towns
  25. The Great Hambino
    I'm over this Eric Byrnes Car Shield commercial they've played 37 times already. Very strong "How do you do, fellow kids" energy
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