Riverbrian

HICKS

That does sound good... I'll be there in 10 hours. Now that I got Bacon down... I could make that... My biggest problem is Bread and Lettuce for the BLT. I buy them with the intention of making a sandwich and then I never make a sandwich and about the time I want a sandwich. The Bread is moldy and the Lettuce is all brown. I guess timing is part of this shopping thing I need to learn.

The way Perk has been pitching... This might be the perfect time to bring him in. That'll give us a chance to come back.

Dozier is back Welcome back Brian

No doubt about it... I gotta get a new hat

I can't read Moose and Squirrel together without a Russian accent sliding into it.

See it's all good until we need the bullpen.

Damn... My MLB Package is way behind.

Not only do pitchers refuse to throw meatballs to Sano... Players also seem to struggle throwing to 1B when he is running toward it. He's an intimidating dude.

There we go DOZIER

Cool... bout time... it's getting dicey.

While we hear nothing but trade deadline silence coming out of the Twins camp, other teams have been eating us alive. The little bit of cushion we once had in the wild card chase has almost gone away. We had a larger lead a couple of innings... umm... weeks ago but that lead is shrinking... I got the innings... weeks thing mixed up because the end of July is starting to feel like our bullpen. Hey... Here come the Mariners to town for a 4 game series and we need to right the ship. Get it back on course. Here are some things to think about: 1. The Mariners -- Seattle is a team that had been expected to be contenders yet they just can't seem to find their way. This from a team that sports a compass for a logo. Seattle has pitching... they've spent money on bats... yet they appear to be lost and I think it's because of that logo. Look at it... go ahead... open up another browser and look at it while you read this. The N for north is almost due south and just a tish to the east. E for East is pointing 3 directions... NW... ENE and SSE. The S for south is located in two directions and you can't go west at all because you can't find a W anywhere. And if you are sailing out of Seattle... you'd have to go west at some point. This is why they are stuck at port, folks. The Mariners need to stop worrying about players until they fix this obvious faulty navigation. Maybe upgrade to GPS or something. 2. The All Star Break -- Remember when the Twins came from behind to beat the Tigers and then won 2 more games to head into the All Star Break? Those were good times. Let me say this... Screw the All Star break for sapping all that momentum and leaving us to restart almost exactly like we started the season, all cold and stuff. If there wasn't an all star break... the Twins probably would be on 15-game winning streak right now. 3. Crickets -- On a quiet night... you can hear the sound of crickets. Crickets have enlarged thighs and those thighs are what produces that well known sound. Crickets will rub their legs together to fill the night with chirps. Only the male can chirp... so I assume it's the male that tells the female to take out the garbage and to quit drinking so much in the cricket world. The primary reason for chirping is to attract a mate. Right now... those of us listening for news on trade deadline deals to improve our club are hearing nothing but crickets. It's good to know that Terry Ryan is busy rubbing his legs together. 4. Deals Deals Deals -- I suppose it's possible that the Twins make a deal between the time 'Thought #3' is posted in the wee morning hours and game time... (Pause) Nah... that wouldn't happen. Meanwhile… everyone else is busy making deals. Hamels is heading to the Rangers... the Dodgers made a 45-team deal picking up two players off the roster of every major league club plus 15 Japanese teams... Carlos Gomez was almost moved to the Mets which made Wilmer Flores cry... Tulo to the Jays... the deals are happening and the deadline expires soon. 5. Days off -- I've been busy at my job. I'm lucky when I can get a day off… However, when I do... I catch up around my place. Laundry, cooking, cleaning and shopping. All I'm thinking is... this is what they call a day off? -------------------- Game-time forecast: 82 deg F, sunny and clear, 0% chance of precipitation, winds from the WNW at 12mph. Lineups: MARINERS Jackson CF Seager 3B Cruz RF Smith LF Trumbo 1B Gutierrez DH Miller SS Taylor 2B Zunino C Happ P TWINS Dozier 2B Hicks CF Mauer 1B Sano 3B Hunter RF Rosario LF Escobar DH Suzuki C Polanco SS Hughes P Go Twins! Play ball! Click here to view the article

Mitch Hedberg: Dude... You gotta give me time to guess.

And when Perkins goes bad... It really gets bad don't it.

Yeah... Where has Bark Been?

LOL Somewhere in a parallel universe... Or I mean City. Pittsburgh Fans are on Pirates Daily Screaming NEIL HUNTINGTON... FIX THIS F%&&ING BULLPen!!!

Dear Terry Ryan, Bullpen... Bullpen... Bullpen Sincerly, Riverbrian

Ahh... Portland... I've heard it's nice. They have an annual naked bike ride there. Any place that does that... Is OK in my book.

Cuz.. May goes in like a lion and out like a lamb.

You should have added... BTW... I look great in this robe.

No... I'm talking about me... Fortunately... I'm too big for a box. Or she would have brought me to a farm a long time ago.

Moving from where to where?

Not True You can hop around on one foot and swear.

My wife yells that at me... A lot.