Vanimal46

Have no fear, Michael Bowden is on the way!

There's nothing that grinds my gears more than when something controversial happens with the Twins (not calling up Berrios, 1 minimal trade at July 31 deadline) and seeing the inevitable "Back in March I thought they would win X # of games, enjoy the ride!" Yes, there's no doubt that the Twins have out performed early March expectations. You know the beauty about a 162 game season? Expectations CAN CHANGE after seeing evidence of REAL games. Were posters still expecting to win 75 games at the All-Star break when the Twins had the 2nd best record in the AL? Still at 75 on Aug. 1 when they still had the WC lead? How about now when they're at 69 wins? No? Then let's stick a fork in that talk. It seems like there's only 2 channels on this TV. One that only talks about early March and one that only talks about 2016 and beyond.

Annnd Welcome Back! To Minnesota Twins Whine Line. I took some time off to reflect on the GAME THREAD debut. The intern was worn out from researching so many hot twins takes in a short amount of time. Anyway, the threads are HEATING UP again with plenty of topics to talk about. Is Sano an MVP?? Will the September call-ups make an impact? Are we still in a playoff race? I'm also looking for very specific stats that I can't seem to find anywhere on TD... If anyone can tell me ABW's HR, 2B, and RBI totals, let me know. We'll take some calls as they come in today. hello?

Is there any science behind how you become right or left handed? I'm absolutely right hand dominant, but swing left handed for golf, hockey, and baseball.

I get that. Back to my first point. If Kepler, a more polished prospect than ABW, has concerns on hitting MLB pitching, then ABW, an all or nothing player, currently on a month long slump I should add, is going to be better?

And are we going to ignore the fact that he's slashing .193/.305/.339 over the last month in AA? If there's doubts about Kepler facing MLB pitching, who's a much more polished prospect currently, ABW will be humiliated on the big club.

I'm 25 Shane and those shows were still relevant in my day too. Also Schoolhouse Rock if you recall that show as well. For those with little ones today, how do you navigate the maze of garbage on TV today?

The ABW Fan Club is back in full force after taking a couple months off of the Minnesota Twins Talk forums. It always makes me smile how hard a few try to convince us all that ABW is the reincarnated version of Babe Ruth....

If that's the case then we need to start a "Pick-up Polanco" and "See ya Santana" ad campaign on TD.

On the 99% club, the hitters are really the only thing of interest. I'm sorry but I'm done with Achter and Tonkin. They haven't proven anything except being AAA, borderline AAAA pitchers. Also hope to see Polanco get more than a cup of coffee to see if he's worth the hype.

So from the sounds of it, we have until the end of today to add Berrios to the 40 man for him to eligible on the playoff roster. Does anyone think this is going to happen?

Any updates from the great MN get-together on other food to try?

There's no need to push Plouffe out of town, but I would certainly mention his name in any trade negotiation this off-season to gauge his value. If he can be included in a package deal to get a young near MLB ready player where we lack options, he's expendable. But I'd be fine if Plouffe were back in 2016 on an arb. contract if the right deal wasn't found.

Believe me North, Mr. Orange is absolutely real if only they could realize their true identity again to surface on TD... I just don't think Mr. Orange is at that point yet coming off a DEEP undercover mission.

That might be a good thing that others think you can "organize" organized crime!

This interview wouldn't be possible without the help from Mr. Orange! Thank you for working with me

Annd Welcome back! To Minnesota Twins Whine Line: GAME THREAD edition. Yesterday's game happened. It wasn't very fun, so I hope you all went to the Great MN Get-Together instead! The only update from the intern is that Mike Pelfrey has now decreased from 72 to 65 overall in MLB The Show. Meanwhile JO Berrios is sitting there in AAA, all 74 overall of him..... It's a day game today, which is prime drinking weather for Vanimal. I'm going to prepare a bloody mary while the intern goes through all of the garbage again. Intern, you're up........ Hi. It's going to be nice again. Sunny. 77 degrees for the first pitch. Getting hotter as we go along. TWINS Lineup: Dozier 2B Escobar SS Mauer 1B Sano DH Rosario RF Nunez 3B Robinson LF Hermann C Buxton CF P - Ervin Santana ® 79 overall on MLB the Show! Dreads that are still too long! ASTROS Lineup: Altuve 2B Gonzalez SS Gattis DH Rasmus RF Gomez CF Valbuena 3B Carter 1B Conger C Marisnick LF P - Lance McCullers ® Coming off of dead arm in AA! Fantastic, I wouldn't be able to do this without your help intern! NOW, we're going to do something a little bit different this morning, I ran out of HOT Takes of the Day in 1 day. Sunday mornings are made for investigative stories and interviews. It's no different for Minnesota Twins Whine Line..... Moderator-Gate 2015 was a shocking discovery for all of us to read a couple of weeks ago. And for those unfamiliar with the story, you can find it HERE. In order to find out WHY the Moderators did this, we brought in an INSIDER to learn more details. This person went so DEEP undercover, that they actually became the cover that was given to them. It's UNCLEAR whether we will hear from this person anytime soon.... In order to protect their identity, their name was changed to Mr. Orange.. The following is our conversation: Van: Mr. Orange, thank you for joining me in the Whine Line SCORCHING hot lounge. The TD community is shocked after reading the news of Moderator-gate 2015, and we're all looking for answers to the biggest conspiracy in the site's history. Mr. O: Thank you for having me, Vanimal. I was expecting something a little more, high-tech, for a show this successful. Van: That's something we're working into the budget. Let's get into it Mr. Orange and talk MODERATOR GATE. Now, The story states that North was the originator of this master plan. How did he convince you to join his cause? And were there other moderators already bought in before you? Mr. O: We all met last summer ... some may recall references to ModCon ... this is where most of the planning took place. North arrived at ModCon very decided that we were going to do this and had a general plan. After promises of lifetime supplies of Canadian delicacies (of beaver tails and poutine) we were all on board and detailed planning began in earnest. We kind of all were 'all in' together ... once the promised delicacies were promised. I'm not sure about the others, but I'm still awaiting my first shipment of beaver tails. (I declined the poutine ... Brian needed a double supply of poutine to get on board.) Something about postage being too high from Canada. Hey, North!! Where the hell are my beaver tails? Yes, a few of us are bit disgruntled. Van: Were there any doubts in your mind about the plan overall? Mr. O: Well ... part of the plan involved sea kayaking. I wasn't sure about this so we decided to test this out by kayaking around Lake Calhoun/Lake of the Isles/Cedar Lake. Unfortunately, we only made it around two of the lakes. A couple of the moderators needed a bit more coaching. Sadly, Brian and glunn just could not keep up ... literally and figuratively ... as their kayaking abilities were ... questionable. Van: Which TD owner was the easiest to convince that this was a great idea? Mr. O: Oh, Parker, absolutely. We just filled our proposal with all kinds of graphs and charts and video clips ... because we know how much he loves these things ... and he was immediately in love. I mean, his eyes did that thing you see in cartoons when a character is hypnotized. It didn't even matter that all those charts and graphs and video clips were fake ... the affect they had was all we needed for him to get all caught up in it. And Brock was pretty easy, too. I mean ... he's a young whippersnapper who easily bows to older authority figures. Van: FASCINATING! What was Chief's role in the group? He seemed to be even more invested than North in the plan with his high-fiving and maniacal laugh.... Mr. O: He kept us all on task and in line. I mean, Chief's kind of scary. I just don't want to find out what his bite is like, no one did. Fear can sometimes be a good motivator. I mean, he would just scream at random people on the street 'GET OFF MY LAWN!' and 'THAT'S MY EKORNES LOUNGER!' Talk about maniacal. And scary. Van: Yikes! I've been told don't mess with Texas, but Chief sounds TERRIFYING! While the plan was going on, were there any Moderators that got cold feet and thought, this isn't right? Mr. O: Well, ChiTown, a little. I mean, you have to understand how ChiTown works. She's all about process and 'doing it right.' I mean, she knows how to do all this stuff here as a moderator better than anyone else, so sometimes can be a little ... well ... 'know it all.' And I don't mean that disparagingly, because she really does ... know it all. But it can come out as sometimes seeming like she knows it better. So, she sometimes questioned the plan here and there ... not in 'should we really do this?' but in 'are we doing this the right way?' I mean, she's about process and doing it right. After all, she was able to give proper directions through Minneapolis so Chief was able to get to Lake Calhoun from downtown without a hitch, while Riverbrian ended up somewhere east of Lake and Lyndale, going the wrong direction, and nearly getting into accidents a few times. Van: Clearly ChiTown has the background to organize a big crime like this....It was a smart choice to trust a Canadian to outdrink an American. Did North have any insider help with closing the deal at Hubert's? Mr. O: That was a lucky bit there. I mean, all he offered was a lifetime supply of Molson Candian Light. Good thing he got the owner drunk first so he didn't know any better. Surprised North didn't know any better. But that was almost the downfall right there. Van: It get get ugly quick after 8 flights of IPA beer, but mission accomplished. So at the end of the day Mr. Orange, you're all $34 MILLION richer after this heist. Was it worth it? Mr. O: No. It really wasn't. Even pooling our spoils, we were still unable to buy the Twins from the Pohlands... Van: At least the advertising money was going towards buying the Twins. Have you taken any vacations to luxurious hotels yet? Or was that just North? Mr. O: Well, considering vacations to luxurious hotels is North's MO, how is that any different now? Van: Touche, Mr. Orange. Well, any final thoughts you want to get off of your chest? Mr. O: Um ... oh! I know! Go Twins! This has been THRILLING radio. Thank you for listening and let's WIN TWINS!

If you think planning went into today, tune in tomorrow for a special Sunday morning interview in the SCORCHING Hot Lounge......

I was hoping it would be a better debut... Now I feel like playing this song in memory of the 2015 playoff race for our favorite ball club... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSz16ngdsG0

Absolutely! Let me just plug in the phone lines again..... And we're live! Testing, hello?

Well mike, the only thing to say is not good my friend, not good. The intern is more intent on watching the game than I am. The mimosa turned into a vodka later on in the day, and, well it's the weekend. Quite frankly I don't know if we're watching the game, or if he's playing MLB The Show to find more show material. The graphics are so realistic! Either way, you made the better choice of going to the breweries and house warming party.

Can someone for the love of GOD go hijack the sound board and BLAST "Careless Whisper" the next time he's at the plate??

By the way TD community. Are we getting any closer to covering my portion of the $217k needed from each member to buy off the Twins? Maybe a kick starter campaign?

Platoon! Welcome to the show. You hit the Nail right on the head with your assessment of Trevor Plouffe. He swings the bat WAY too hard when runners are on base. I couldn't tell you how many times I've screamed at the TV BUNT!!! But they never listen... Ugh. The frustrations of knowing the future of baseball but no one listens.

Okay the hot take meter is rising.....