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Vanimal46

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Everything posted by Vanimal46

  1. Diehard, now I know why you wanted me to look into this. After thorough research, the conspiracy runs DEEP, with historical family ties. Holy cow! In order to tell the whole story, we need to go back to the beginning of the stock market. Now a quick search on Wikipedia states the following, "The earliest recorded organization of securities trading in New York among brokers directly dealing with each other can be traced to the Buttonwood Agreement, signed on May 17, 1792." We investigated further, and found an interesting signature on the document.... Gütentag Roosevelt POHLAD. Could it be? The owners of our favorite ball club has family ties to the start of the stock market that we know today??? We NEED to know more. Ancestortree.com confirmed our beliefs, that the Pohlad's great great great great grandfather Gütentag created the stock market! What a huge find! Now you must be asking yourself, "Vanimal, what does this have to do with anything?" Well, let me BLOW your mind. The Pohlad's shouldn't be in the position they are in today as owners, because they made a TERRIBLE investment in the past... The Pohlad's got inside knowledge from Olivia Summers, one of their long lost relatives, to invest in InfoSpace. They bought thousands of shares in March 2000 at $1,305 a share. They thought at the time nothing's going to stop us now! However, in less than a year, the stock fell to $22 a share... Remember when the Twins were going to be CONTRACTED?? Hmmm.... Since then, the Pohlad's have been trying to collect all losses from the fan base, and cut all contact from Olivia. Now they only trust their broker cousin, George. I'm not sure if I answered your question at all, but I love a good conspiracy
  2. There's not enough beers in the world available where I can solve this riddle.
  3. "The Memory of Running" by Ron McLarty is one of the best books I've read recently. I've heard it's even better as an audio book.
  4. I don't see why not! I'm going to have to rest up this week and save the real hot Twins takes for this weekend!
  5. Mike, I'm really glad you brought up the story behind Vanimal. It goes a little something like this: It was 2012, and the Twins were beginning the complete rebuild of the team. I read online that Ben Revere was traded for Trevor May, and a guy named Vance Worley. After digging a little more, I learned that Worley gave himself the nickname VANIMAL. For a guy that was a spot starter for the Phillies and give himself that nickname, he must have major cojones to do that. And that's the kind of cojones needed to start a show like this. I couldn't have a handle like BillTwinsGuy and spit out HOT sports takes. It needs a STRONG name like Vanimal.
  6. Chief, great to hear from you again! Between you and diehard recording my every move, to pulling off the greatest heist in Twins Daily history, I can see why you had to lay low for a while. None the less, I'm glad you're back from your luxurious vacation paid for by TD members. I can see how you can get confused with Prince, the PURPLE RAIN magician, and Nigerian princes. You would think, yeah they have to be the same person. But we learned a few weeks ago that they are in fact NOT the same person. We emailed nigerian_prince@yesitsascamduh.com thinking it was Prince from Minneapolis. All he needed was some help moving funds over, and just needed our bank account number, social security, and password. I gladly obliged because Prince brought great joy to my life. HOWEVER, I have not seen a dime of his money, and all of my money is GONE! Now I have to do this show more often than I like to make up for it, including doing GAME THREADS. I really feel like this woman shown below http://shutupimtalking.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/02783.jpg Bring your popcorn this weekend, Minnesota Twins Whine Line is coming to a game thread near you!
  7. All that's missing is a shortcut for Oregon Trail & Backyard Baseball and it's my childhood all over again!
  8. You're up and at em with tough hitting questions this morning diehard! This is the first i'm hearing about a conspiracy about the Twins and the stock market. I promise to give a full report after extensive drinking, I mean RESEARCH, later tonight. By the way, happy Windows95 day! Seeing these screen savers is something that Brock sees everyday, but for others, it's a trip down memory lane. Feel free to explore with me here.
  9. Mike, I'm so glad to hear from you. The intern went rouge and traveled to your house to check in on you! I told him "What are you thinking?! You're breaking and entering in a regular caller's home! Grab the scotch from the liquor cabinet and get out of there." To answer your question, I don't know why we all can't get along on TD. Everybody seems to be on edge since moderator-gate 2015 was brought to light. I think if more people learned about the future of baseball like we do on Whine Line, we'd all be more positive.
  10. J Dude, as always you're really making Vanimal dig DEEP for answers. AJ very well could have passed waivers, and is anticipating his next move to a contender like the Twins! But the inside scoop we heard on Whine Line is he was really interested in trying out the edibles vending machines in Denver! And really, who could blame him? As far as making an offensive impact on the Twins, I just don't see it. The link below will show AJ's bunt form... And you'll see just like me, it's TERRIBLE. The ball went straight in the air!! We can't have those types of mishaps when the Twins are contending. http://www.chicagotribune.com/chi-ct00251170b_alcham1120051016185245-photo.html
  11. I can see the viewpoint of declining on Reyes, because I was anti-Reyes as well at the deadline. But it's something to ponder on an off day. And if his next trade is a pure salary dump for salary dump, I would certainly try throwing out Nolasco or Santana to get out of those contracts. And me personally, I'm just not buying into Escobar yet as the SS of the present or future.
  12. The honey moon phase ended quickly for Jose Reyes and the Colorado Rockies. Judging by this article, Reyes will quickly accept any trade to a contender, and the Rockies will try to unload his this offseason as they rebuild. http://www.denverpost.com/rockies/ci_28686281/jaded-reyes-would-welcome-trade Any new thoughts on potentially targeting him this winter?
  13. AND we're back! It's been a crazy weekend of talking to lawyers, accountants, and TD owners to settle on Moderator-gate 2015. I heard the Twins won a couple of games in a row. YES! My intern said that Tyler Duffey's curve ball has increased to 87 overall on MLB the Show. So ALL IS GOOD in Twins land. Since the Ashley Madison hack, we've yet to hear from regulars like diehard, Chief, and mike. Hope they're not in the doghouse! We'll take calls in the order that they were received.. Hello?
  14. I think there's a couple of things that goes into it. Most announcers are "old school" ball guys and may not value the advanced stats. It's more so appealing to the casual fan and 7 out of 10 in the world. Sad to say but you know there would be people calling in and complaining because advanced metrics are shown on the screen instead of traditional stats.
  15. It certainly could be just conjecture, but I also wouldn't put it past a guy like Reusse, forever a ball guy, getting an inside scoop like that. Heck, even Lavelle E. Neal and Berardino could know that too and saving it for the inevitable Torii Hunter puff pieces written all throughout September.
  16. Best news I've heard today!
  17. Question for those that have been to Target Field. How many Sano jerseys/t shirts do you see in the crowds compared to Mauer? Is it 1 Sano jersey for every 10 Mauer? I'd imagine by next year we'll see more Sano jerseys in the stands than Mauer.
  18. It's our first call in from a TD owner!! Did you not get the numerous voice mails from my intern?! Break it down for us Brock, what IS the end goal of moderator-gate 2015? Buying a Caribbean island with the millions from advertising?? Letting down your fan base with an inferior Windows Vista product??
  19. AND we're back! After my breaking news story about the moderator-gate 2015, the intern tucked me into bed so he can research on MLB The Show 2015. When I was away, I received a voice mail from spycake! Thank you for the call spycake. Now that we learned that TD is being run off of unused Windows Vista cds, we are all AT RISK for hackers to leak our true identities..... The question is, what will be the downfall of this hack? Will we all lose our jobs, knowing that anyone can read our HOT Twins takes? Will Bark's wife take him back after seeing the messages he's typed on this site? Will diehard and Chief be thrown in JAIL for being USSR spies? We can only hope!
  20. Little did you know I found the cameras stashed in my apartment by Chief and diehard... And hid them in your OFFICE. You really need a better hideout for diabolical planning.....
  21. Did we just stumble upon moderator-gate 2015?!! BREAKING: TD posters duped and bamboozled by internal staff. More to come at 10... But have you heard the OTHER side to the story? Date: April 29, 2015. It started off like any normal day to monitor the site as the team played a 12:10 game vs. the Tigers. North was wired in with spot on posts, and everything was running smoothly. That is, until 1:34, when he receives 5 PMs simultaneously from glunn, head moderator. Glunn is a man of integrity, with one major flaw.....MICROMANAGEMENT. North read through the messages, and it all started blending together. Go do this. Go do that. We need your eyes on the Hunter thread. Dave is going off the rails again... North couldn't take it anymore! So he came up with a plan, you see. One that did not include glunn. He organized a secret moderators meeting, notable attendees: diehard, Chief, Riverbrian, and chitown. The plan: rebuild a replica Twins Daily run on Windows95 and sell valuable ad space to entities with ads that take up the entire screen OR videos. They could make millions! And at the same time, promote the illusion to their fan base that they're still an improving website coming off a successful rebuilding effort. The next thing they needed was buy-in from ownership. First target: Brock. Luckily for the moderators, they caught Brock on a stressful day. He was busy trying to prevent a meltdown on the Hunter thread.... The only words Brock listened to were millions, promote, improvement, website, and successful. He immediately says "yes, now let me get back to what's important here PLEASE!!" North and Chief high-five, and move on.... To Seth. Crazy enough, the moderators benefitted by catching Seth on the road. You see, Seth was in Chattanooga that day to watch our elite prospects. North volunteered to call, knowing that his service was the worst out of the group. Seth picks up, but IRONICALLY, Seth heard the exact same words as Brock, and gave the go ahead. After north hangs up, chitown and diehard jump for joy! Chief laughs maniacally, knowing they're one step closer to paradise. Last but not least, John needed to sign off. The mission needed to be extended into the night. John just completed the Gleeman and the Geek podcast, and was on the way home... Until he receives a call from North. John changes plans and instead drives to Hubert's for a drink with him... North knew they couldn't get lucky 3 times in a row, he had to bend the rules. As soon as John took off his jacket, 12 flights of craft IPAs were delivered to the booth. "I've had a rough day John, the one thing I need right now is a drinking pal," north announced. "Anything for you, my friend," John replied. Everything was going as planned 3....4....5....8 flights in. North, as usual, was on his game, spitting one hilarious joke after another. Enough to make John spill off the booth chair in laughter. And cleverly, in-between jokes, he snuck in the plan. All it needed was John's signature. He bribed the waitress to hand the document to John instead of the credit card receipt... And it WORKED!! So yes, the moderators achieved their financial dreams, and staying in fancy hotels. And it hurt their fan base..... But at the end of the day, isn't the OTHER side of the story more fun?
  22. I suppose it boils down to having better options out there, and something could have been changed with quality. To me the bread is the most important ingredient of a good sub. JJ's is forgettable at best... Equivalent to Suzuki leading off. They really started to hold back on the meat.. I'd like to have more than 1 layer of turkey. But they have the green light to load you up on lettuce that's on the brink of spoiling!
  23. Are you thinking Mesa Pizza? I didn't go to the U of M, (go Mavericks) but my times partying there I recall going to that place.
  24. Good to hear from you again. I've been sitting at home counting the hours until I could go back on the air. After window peeping was endorsed over these airwaves, the activity increased 77% in Minnesota. Also, with Chief and diehard recording my every move, there's several things that get Vanimal in trouble..... Your question has a no brainer solution, Kwak. When I come across situations like this, I drive to the library. Go ahead and print out each players' photo. The next step is going to take some time, but you have to introduce each player to your friend. This is Ervin, he SMELLS baseballs. This is Worley, the Vanimal. If he still can't see the difference, I'm at a complete loss on what to do.
  25. Bark, it wouldn't be a real show without your input. For someone who just learned that you may be kicked to the curb by a Nigerian prince, you're handling this well..... I would continue to ignore her and continue the quest of reliving your 20s! At first glance, Jared sounds like a once in a lifetime friend to make. But i can see why you declined the offer... I mean, he's promoting a TERRIBLE sandwich shop. How can you like anything else he likes if that's the first impression? Look at me, speculating over a guy in Indiana named Jared. I'm sure we'll never hear of this guy..... Now the fun part, TWINS TALK. Miguel Sano is the only player that gets the green light to swing away on any pitch. He will ABSOLUTELY top Bonds' HR record next year. In fact, I can predict the stats that matter for 2016: 180 H - 74 HR - 106 Bunt singles. Here's how this happens: We've already decided bunting every at bat is the FUTURE of baseball. Eventually a pitcher will get bored and disinterested. His judgment lapses, and there it is, Bark... An 80 MPH meat ball down the pipe. Sano shows bunt, pulls back, and BAM! Go to Vegas now and bet everything you have.
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