As to the OP. Wallner leading off would be fine by me. As Indiana Twin notes, Schwarber works out just fine.
I also note Schwarber isn't getting PH for in the 5th.
"...many of whom have been seen at camp with metallic prosthetics, wires, circuits and tubes engrafted into their arms and legs" –
Tubes?
TUBES??!?
Frickin cheap Pohlads. Tubes are so 1960s. What, did we get this equipment at a yard sale??
I think 99 percent of the posters at TD understand most regulars don't take many ST road trips. MLB even had to make up a rule a few years back requiring teams to take at least "4 regulars from the previous season" onnroad trips. "Regulars" is pretty loose and teams stretch it even further, but the point is, teams don't ask many regulars to make trips.
That doesn't explain the deployment of the players that DID make the trip.
"This was a lineup full of players that are guaranteed nothing this year. They almost all played positions where they are being tested, or where the team hopes they won’t have to play"
How on God's green earth does tbis make any sense?
"...and depending on radar gun readings, a possible MLB contract--at league minimum, natch--might just be in the offing!" stated the spokesman. "Who says we don't sign free agent talent?"
I LOVE these, Al From SoDak! Easily among my favorite reads on TD. I like the reminiscing, and always so well chosen and well written.
And I do remember The Klaw!
If only because I have something of a soft spot for people born in 1958. Lots of tremendously intelligent and easy-on-the-eyes folks born that year.