According to wire service reports, tonight's game for Cleveland is in jeopardy. The opponent's players are threatening a walkout crawlout if certain demands are not met. Apparently only apple juice is being provided during mid-inning nutrition breaks, and a radical faction of the young players' union is insisting grape juice be offered as an option as well. Also, a Designated Napper is being demanded by the babies, for both teams' lineups. The Indians are not totally averse to the idea, since third baseman Jose Ramirez has been caught napping several times on defense this season, but the league is not yet on board with this. Finally, the Sunshine Kidz are holding firm that all sliding be done on actual playground slides, to be installed at each base. In one concession, the babies are dropping their demand that Cleveland players change their diapers when needed. "I'm not taking **** from any team," second baseman Jason Kipnis stated, claiming to speak for others as well. At press time, agreement had been reached that brand-name Crayola crayons will be used by both teams in writing out the starting lineups, and not those waxy ones you find at the dollar store - observers were surprised that Manfred let the Indians cave, on this cost-be-damned initiative. These are no babes in the woods, at the negotiating table.