"but you don't seem to be too interested in figuring out your role in why it cannot be had" This is not a defensive reaction but I feel the exact same thing about your opinion on this. And that makes the conversation really difficult to have for different reasons than I've outlined in previous posts. White people hold the vast majority of influence and power in this nation. We simply do not see what it's like to walk around with privilege on a daily basis because it's invisible to us (I actually dislike the phrase "white privilege", as it's too easy to shrug off... I prefer something more along the lines of "white default", which focuses on how we walk through life as "Basic Human" and everyone else is "Other"). I don't get harassed by the cops, no one has ever asked to touch my hair, people don't mock my name, people don't avoid me on the street, people don't assume negative stereotypes about me unless they're completely benign and silly like "he can't dance". And because we simply don't know what we're talking about here, I feel we need to curb our outrage when things get uncomfortable; when the conversation goes to a place that makes us squirm in our seats a little bit. I don't pretend that everything that comes out of the left is intelligent or well-worded; hell, I disagree with loads of stuff said by people both to the left and right of me on the political spectrum. But what I try to do is ignore the most idiotic things that come from those sources and focus on the message. Because it's obvious that there are very real, systemic issues surrounding race in this country. I can either get upset about how the message is phrased or I can get upset that the message needs to be conveyed at all. I choose the latter. And if someone asks indirectly if my dislike of a player is racially-motivated, I'm not going to lose my **** over it because it's a legitimate question given the deep-seeded biases institutionalized in this nation. Again, I choose to pause and consider whether their statement has merit. That doesn't mean I need to agree with their statement. Agreement is not required with anything but we should always be listening and we should not seek out accusatory tone to deflect the conversation to semantics at the expense of the message. TLDR: white Americans have held the microphone for 242 years. It won't kill us to sit down and listen for a couple of minutes, even if the things said make us uncomfortable.