Twins Video
1. Draft Beer – Beer out of the keg is draft beer. Miller Genuine Draft is served in bottles and they call it Genuine Draft because it’s supposed to taste like it’s out of the keg. That’s Wisconsin for ya… only that state is drunk enough to call that 'genuine.' It just doesn’t seem like a genuine Genuine to me.
2. Draft Horse – A draft horse is a horse that pulls stuff. If it didn’t pull stuff it would be called a “horse that doesn’t pull stuff”. Draft horses are larger and stronger than a horse that doesn’t pull stuff but still smaller than Earl Campbell. A draft horse has never won the Kentucky Derby and they are insulted when the race track patrons yell out “Unhook the Plow” when they lag behind in a race.
3. Conscription – There have been moments in our history that our young men have been drafted into military service. Currently… there is no draft but young men are asked to register with the Selective Service a month before reaching their 18th birthday. This acts like a jack in the box because the draft can pop out rather quickly. As long as nobody turns that handle which produces the song “All around the mulberry bush... the monkey chased the weasel… the monkey thought twas all in fun..."
Yes I realize that that song is stuck in your head now.
"'Pop!' goes the weasel!"
4. The Overdraft – Our credit score is up around 8 million or something so I’ve never felt the pain of an overdraft. I do remember the disappointment a friend of mine had when he got an overdraft notice. I stopped by his place… and he was holding the notice in his hand and he said… “I don’t know what to do… that was all the money I had and I’m overdrawn by $20 according to this… My net worth is negative 20 dollars." I had his fridge open as he was speaking so I could take his last beer and I told him that he was worth more than that because this jar of olives and the half pack of bologna in his fridge was worth maybe a couple of bucks.
5. The 1st Draft – If you’ve ever wondered how these Game Thread openings get so strange... it’s simple… I don’t allow a 2nd draft. That way I have no chance to come to my senses. But I have an editor. She tries to make sense of it all so you can, too. I said, she tries.
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Lineups:
RED SOX
Mookie Betts [R] RF
Dustin Pedroia [R] 2B
Xander Bogaerts [R] SS
David Ortiz (L) DH
Hanley Ramirez [R] 1B
Jackie Bradley (L) CF
Travis Shaw (L) 3B
Chris Young [R] LF
Christian Vazquez [R] C
Steven Wright [R] P
TWINS
Eduardo Nunez [R] SS
Robbie Grossman (S) LF
Joe Mauer (L) DH
Trevor Plouffe [R] 3B
Brian Dozier [R] 2B
Byung-ho Park [R] 1B
Max Kepler (L) RF
Kurt Suzuki [R] C
Byron Buxton [R] CF
Tyler Duffey [R] P
Game-time forecast: 89 deg F, 46% chance of rain/thunderstorms, (although another source says it will be clear at gametime), winds at 9mph from the SW. Just for perspective, it's about 20 deg higher currently in Minneapolis than it is in Fort Myers. Hmm.







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