Otherwise Normal Man Purchases Diamondbacks/Twins Tickets

[RandBalls Stu]

Image courtesy of Flickr/Mac H

With fan morale plummeting almost as fast as the team’s winning percentage, it’s an inopportune time for the Twins to be starting a 10-game homestand to close out the home portion of their 2025 season. Even with the Yankees coming to town next week, good seats are still available, to put it mildly.

This makes the case of Ken Aamodt even more baffling.

Aamodt, a Lakeville father of two, bought two tickets to Saturday evening’s game versus the Arizona Diamondbacks. Multiple sources say he bought them on purpose.

“When I heard he did that, I thought maybe he had a connection to the D-Backs,” said James McTeer, Aamodt’s friend and co-worker. “He doesn’t. He’s never even been to Arizona. I don’t know what’s going on, but I shot him a text saying 'hey, you can always talk to me if ur ever going through something.'”

Aamodt’s spouse, Kate, is also perplexed.

“He said he had a surprise for Saturday night earlier this week, and I got excited,” said Aamodt. “We haven’t been on a date in a while, and the kids are staying with his grandparents all weekend.

“Then he said he got home run deck seats for the Twins and Diamondbacks. I thought he was kidding. But no. He wasn’t. He even got paper tickets. Paper!”

The Diamondbacks are on the fringe of the NL Wild Card race, but it’s not at all clear if Aamodt is aware of this, or if he even knows that they’re in the National League.

“He paid face value for these tickets,” said McTeer. “Go to StubHub! They’re like $10!”

Sports psychologists say they’re equally puzzled by Aamodt’s unprecedented behavior.

“Diehard fans are obviously going to the games regardless of record or weather,” said Dr. Lorraine Clay, a fellow at the University of Nebraska’s Institute for Recreational Psychology. “Aamodt hasn’t been to any games this year. He doesn’t subscribe to the Twins’ TV package. There’s no indication that he likes baseball at all. I hate to diagnose from afar, but he’s clearly had a mental break and should be in jail.”

Aamodt was unavailable for comment, though not in jail (for now), according to Dakota County Sheriff Department records.

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It's a lattice of coincidence.

Just part of the cosmic unconsciousness.

Like plate or shrimp.

[Hosken Bombo Disco]

Rumor has it that… Single game ticket buyers who bought directly from the official Twins site or MLB Ballpark app will see an additional surcharge of 11.11% billed to their cards for the 10th inning tonight. 

You think extra innings are free baseball?
Not no more!