Lockout Lookup: Jose Mijares

[RandBalls Stu]

At the turn of the last decade, one man bestrode the mound like a colossus. This is the story of Jose Mijares.

Subject: Jose Mijares

Why You Remember Him: Mijares was part of the Minnesota Twins bullpen from 2008-2011. A promising start (2.34 ERA with 55/23 K/BB in 2009) deteriorated to the point where he was non-tendered after the 2011 season. If you recall the Twins bullpen of that period, that wasn’t a ringing endorsement of Mijares’ continued viability.

Mijares rebounded with Kansas City and San Francisco in 2012, appearing in 78 games and snagging a World Series ring with the Giants.

Of course, the real reason you remember him is that he was, well, a big fella. We love the hefty relievers, don’t we folks? Terry Forster, Rich Garces, and Mijares all sort of looked like regular dudes instead of world-class athletes with 2.1% body fat who only eat protein shakes, plain chicken breasts, and broccoli. It also plays into the fiction that, hey, if these guys can do it, we could go out there and strike someone out, return a Serena Williams serve, get a bucket in an NBA game, etc. Please understand that this could never happen, not in a million billion years. The humiliation on your face as you attempted and failed to do any of these things over and over would power a large Ohio city if it could be harnessed for electricity. Let’s say Youngstown.

What You Don’t Remember: He was dinged for using a banned substance (non-performance enhancing) in 2015.

What You Might Remember: Some other 2011 bullpen denizens: Alex Burnett. Dusty Hughes. Eric Hacker. Chuck James. Lester Oliveros. They went 63-99 for a reason, man. 

What’s He Up To: There’s nothing super current out there. I don’t even think Seth knows what he’s up to, and Seth knows everything about Twins past, present, and future. Hopefully he’s somewhere eating whatever he wants and living a nice retired life.

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[Jeff A]

I remember seeing somewhere that Mijares had returned to his native Venezuela.  I couldn't find the source for that, though, so I wouldn't want anyone to rely too heavily on it.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

3 hours ago, RandBalls Stu said:

The humiliation on your face as you attempted and failed to do any of these things over and over would power a large Ohio city if it could be harnessed for electricity. Let’s say Youngstown.

Let's say Toledo.

 

For some reason i always want to think it is also a dish of Mexican cuisine, like a Tamale. So the notion it is electrified to the point of spicy seems like validation on all fronts.

 

And i for one don't want to discourage these hopes and dreams. I hope and dream it becomes a viable source of green energy, and we save the ecosystem.

[Brandon]

I remember him hitting a player then Deleon Young got hit in retaliation and went after Jose instead of the opposing pitcher

[RJA]

Stu, why don't you put together a Twins All Time Dad's Body Team?  Mijares would qualify, as would Garces, Astudillo, Sano especially a couple years back, Herbie in his later years and, of course, Bartolo Colon, the Big Sexy.