This would largely be astronomers and engineers, mostly associated with the Kepler spacecraft. http://kepler.nasa.gov As near as I can tell Max Kepler is not related to Johannes. I wondered about that.
You got me thinking about Hooke's Law for a rubberband. Found this as a starting place: http://c21.phas.ubc.ca/sites/default/files/rubber_band_write_up.pdf
Really it's a matter of avoiding the kind of long losing streaks that killed them the past few years. Then at or near .500 is within reach. That should motivate the guys in September to keep those tails battled off, and the after its gotten.
Thanks, and to Seth as well, for doing some fact checking. It does seem likely that if this was a true report someone else would have at least mentioned it.
I like to think otherwise all the time. It's a habit picked up from this guy, among others.
Oh, and I think Fuld is the perfect fourth outfielder for this team.