Riverbrian

It depends on how high you raise them and the support structure that keeps them from falling back to the ground.

Head made of rubber and bottom made of springs?

This was the right move and it's something that I have advocated for the past few months. I do want to say that it was very painful to advocate that and now that it has happened... it's still somewhat painful even if I got what I wanted. Here's the deal... The Twins are mine. I've invested myself in this club and I plan to continue investing myself into this club. I don't know another way and I don't want to know another way. We all got to put our passions into something. Anybody else who invests themselves in my club is my teammate and that is how I viewed Terry Ryan all these years... Regardless of how I felt he performed in his very important role. I wish Terry nothing but the best and I honestly thank him for his efforts on my behalf as the biggest Twins fan in the world. I realize that this is how it must begin... but it can't stop here. Yes... Terry Ryan was where the final decision buck stopped. However... I assume that he was operating on the advice of his many employees and that is what needs to be assessed next. I certainly hope that someone will be reading all reports to find out who advocated what and that each member of the front office is properly assessed on the merits of each suggestion that led to getting us to where we are.

From Tigger to Vanimal. Darwin may have underestimated you.

The Twins are in Detroit to open up 3 game series against the A.L. Central 2nd place Tigers. The Twins didn’t do the Tigers any favors losing 2 games out of 3 against the 1st place Indians over the weekend. The Tigers could use a few favors. Every sub species of Tiger is listed as endangered and that’s because the other 29 teams are encroaching on their habitat. The Bay of Bengal, Siberia, Indochina, Sumatra, Southern Ohio, a handful of college campuses and Michigan are the only locations on earth where you can still find them in the wild. Here are some things to think about: 1. Tony the Tiger – They’re Grrreat!!! Maybe so… but if you knew the history… that line will send a chill down your spine. Tony the Tiger is actually quite frightening. The Kellogg Company headquarters is located about 120 miles to the west of Detroit in Battle Creek, Michigan. Battle Creek was the ideal location for production of all the cereal brands they produce because of the rich springs of high fructose corn syrup that flows through the town creek. The fructose was so valuable that people would come from many miles to wash their pants in it. It was a muscular, deep voiced, English speaking, scarf wearing Tiger named Tony and his violent gang of Toucan Sam, Snap, Crackle and Pop, under the employ of Kellogg’s, that secured the creek’s resources for cereal production exclusively; and they did so through a series of bloody battles at the creek. 2. Tigger – North of Detroit lies the Hundred Acre Wood and an extreme subspecies of Tiger called a Tigger. Tiggers are slightly different from tigers… for example… the double G proves that they can’t spell… they have redickerous speech impediments… they tend to bounce around instead of stalking low to the ground... they go a very long time between meals... and they are clever enough to lull prey into a false sense of security by pretending friendship until they can catch them easily off guard. Tigger’s favorite foods are Rabbits, Piglets, Owls, Donkeys, Kangas, Roos and Pooh Bears. 3. Maneater – Oh-Oh Here she comes… Watch out Boy… She’ll chew you up. Brett Hull and Adam Oates wrote this song at Joe Louis Arena between periods of a hockey game between the Blues and Red Wings. They were inspired to write it after witnessing a female tiger burst into the visiting locker room and eat Boy O' Conner (Blues equipment manager). The Tiger was smuggled into the arena by a fan intending to replace the goofy octopus thing they do. 4. Siegfried and Roy – In October of 2003 during a show at the Mirage, Roy Horn was bitten in the neck by a 7 year old Tiger named Montecore in front of a live audience. Both Siegfried and Roy defended the Tiger’s behavior by saying that the cat was trying to protect him. After an extensive investigation… it was determined that the Tiger actually attacked Roy because it didn’t like the name Montecore and it was sick and tired of being painted White before every show. 5. Tiger Woods – His fame began in 1978 at the age of two when he putted on the Mike Douglas Show. At Age 3 he shot a 48 over nine holes. At age 8, he broke 80 over 18 holes for the first time. He won the Masters at age 20 and by the time he was 33… he had won 14 Majors. In 2009… Forbes Magazine declared that Tiger was the first athlete to earn over one billion dollars. Tiger was on top of the world but his much publicized fall from grace proved to be very costly. Not only did he lose his wife because of numerous affairs, a 2009 study estimated the shareholder loss from the affairs to be between 5 and 12 billion. Scrutiny was reaching a fever pitch so Tiger retreated from public life and attended a 45 day therapy program in the Virgin Islands. Afterwards they were renamed… “The Islands.” ____________________ Lineups: TWINS Eduardo Nunez (R] SS Joe Mauer (L) 1B Miguel Sano (R] 3B Brian Dozier (R] 2B Max Kepler (L) RF Robbie Grossman (S) DH Eddie Rosario (L) LF Kurt Suzuki (R] C Byron Buxton (R] CF Ricky Nolasco (R] P TIGERS Ian Kinsler (R] 2B Cameron Maybin (R] CF Miguel Cabrera (R] 1B Victor Martinez (S) DH Nick Castellanos (R] 3B Justin Upton (R] LF Mike Aviles (R] RF Jarrod Saltalamacchia (S) C Jose Iglesias (R] SS Matt Boyd (L) P Game-time forecast: 87 deg F, mostly clear, no chance of rain, winds at 10mph from the WNW. Play ball! Go Twins! Click here to view the article

OK That's That

No That's Joe Mauer

A couple more photo thoughts: 1. Grossman looks like he was placed there by Bark 2. It's pretty clear that not every Minnesotan knows exactly where to look.

A couple of things: Based on that photo: 1. I'm under the impression that you love Arms? 2. I pressed ESC and it didn't do anything

I've been thinking that for quite some time. His stuff moves pretty nice. He's looked sharp almost every time.

He looks like he needs one of those cones.

No All those years living in the desert Chief has evolved away from fur. He looks more like this: http://animals.sandiegozoo.org/sites/default/files/juicebox_slides/gila_01.jpg

No... but...

Before the game is done... I meant... I should have typed that.

I'm calling it now SANO will homer You may ask how I know that and I'll tell you. It's because I benched him tonight on my fantasy team to play Billy Hamilton cuz I'm facing someone with a bunch of rabbits. So Sano... will homer.

Yeah So you can't lick him.

Might be It was getting kind of hypnotic.

How did you know that I have one of those on right now?

I like that Sano is hitting 3 Vargas is hitting 6 Buxton is hitting 9 This makes it... for sure... that somebody will be up every inning that I really want to watch.

DOZIER

That reads like you are cheering for it

Our family as well. The kids always chose it... when we allowed them to... you know... have input. I didn't meet Tom Prince but while sitting on a bench waiting for the kids to finish getting wet... I did meet a guy from Indiana that owned about 30 Convenience Stores. I think his name was Tom. I remember this because I asked him how business was going and he then told me absolutely everything. I think he covered the profit margin on every single thing he sold from Gas to Twinkies and after it was all done... I realized I never got an answer to the original question so I can't say for sure if Business was good or not.

One of my favorite Rock stories was Steve Miller telling everyone that he made up the word Pompitous. A song from the 50's called the "The Letter" by the Medallions had the line "puppetutes of love" along with another unique word "Pizmotality" that Steve used in a different song so it was clear that Steve Miller was very aware of this song. Long story short... Steve Miller plagiarized a made up word and got it wrong and ended up making up a word. Love that Story

Yeah Sometimes... I'd like to shake her tree.