Nine of twelve

I hate to sound cynical but there goes any trade value Cave might have had.

It has been a very, very long time since I bought a traditional American mega-brewery beer.

FTFY.

This is an excusable newbie error. Those of us who have been here a while have a high level of appreciation for RandBalls Stu's excellent satirical work.

I think they'll probably win more than one.

Well, the predicted score is correct, but it's only the bottom of the fourth.

Well, what fun that was. That drops me to 0-2 in game thread openers this season.

So for a player making the minimum you would be OK if he let it get by him?

Can Cruz get special dispensation to use a Segway on the basepaths?

Thank you to whichever moderator moved the lineup and batting order to the OP.

Greetings and welcome to the game thread du jour. As we all know, game threads involve baseball only to the extent that comments are posted in conjunction with that day's game. There is no requirement that these comments have anything to do with anything. With that in mind today's opening post will consist simply of some some quotes attributed to Steven Wright. No, not the 8/30/1984 Steven Wright who is a pitcher in the Pirates organization. I'm referring to the 12/6/1955 Steven Wright. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you. I went to a general store but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific. If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer? I named my dog Stay. When I call him, I say, "Come here, Stay". He went insane. What's another word for Thesaurus? All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand. If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate. Someone asked me if I could choose someone living or dead to have dinner with, who would it be? I said someone living. I spilled spot remover on my dog. He's gone now. I was trying to daydream but my mind kept wandering. I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. I felt sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, "Got any shoes you're not using?" Gametime weather forecast: Mostly cloudy, 54F, winds NW at 8 MPH. Lineups TBA. Go Twins! Complete batting order and lineups: Twins: P: Jose Berrios ® 1. Max Kepler (L) RF 2. Josh Donaldson ® 3B 3. Nelson Cruz ® DH 4. Jorge Polanco (S) 2B 5. Trevor Larnach (L) LF 6. Jake Cave (L) CF 7. Miguel Sano ® 1B 8. Ben Rortvedt (L) C 9. Andrelton Simmons ® SS Tigers: P: Jose Urena ® 1. Robbie Grossman (S) LF 2. Harold Castro (L) CF 3. Jeimer Candelario (S) 3B 4. Miguel Cabrera ® DH 5. Nomar Mazara (L) RF 6. Jonathan Schoop ® 1B 7. Niko Goodrum (S) SS 8. Willi Castro (S) 2B 9. Jake Rogers ® C

And most of us remember 2006. The first 58 games: 25-33. The following 104 games: 71-33. Although, keep in mind that that team's bullpen was a brick wall.

Really? I thought everyone knew about this. But here it is.

This is a good thing. But is there still a difference in games suspended after 5 innings?

It's too bad we couldn't have gotten through the bottom of the fifth (with a lead) before the rain came. I've never understood MLB's rationale on handling unfinished games. If the reason for not finishing after 5+ innings is the weather the game becomes official (if one team is in the lead). If the reason for not finishing before 5 innings is the weather the game is wiped out and replayed in its entirety. If the reason for not finishing is anything else, such as a power outage, the game is suspended no matter at which point play stopped and is completed from the point of suspension.

I'm not a meteorologist but based on the radar I'm sure the starters are done for the evening. The fate of this game lies with the bullpens.

His salary is immaterial. Is a pitcher making the major league minimum is allowed to pitch badly?

There are only two words we need to know: Phil Cuzzi.

I'm not going to even attempt to say what an equitable trade would be. But I will say two things. One, a player, no matter who he is, should be traded if the return results in a net improvement of the organization. Two, any time a very high-profile player is traded away or traded for, the GM had damn well better win the trade. If he or she doesn't, his or her reputation is shot and so is his or her career. (see Lynn, Mike.)

Well, Byron Buxton is looking like the guy we hoped he'd be.

It would be appropriate if all of those walks were the outcome of nibbling after getting ahead 1-2.

G. H.

Kepler with a doinky RBI single off a lefty. Maybe that bodes well for him.

Kiriloff with a nicely-struck double off a lefty. Just the latest of many things that bode well for this guy.

It's not only the call on the Arraez play that this home plate umpire is missing.