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Vanimal46

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Everything posted by Vanimal46

  1. Vanimal46
    Why did you have to lock me in a cage, Intern? We had a good thing going.. Was it the FAME and FORTUNE of hosting a national sports radio show that drove you to eliminating me? All of those times tucking you in at night because you were too sad from a Twins loss.... Giving you the spotlight to talk about the lineups and weather on game threads... It's OVER. Maybe someone like Always will do better in your role...
  2. Vanimal46
    ANND Welcome Back! To Minnesota Twins Whine Line. It's been a crazy last 72 hours... You know in most every movie where the person the lead character LEAST expects to betray them? Well, that happened to your host over the weekend.. Let's reminisce about how we originally found the Intern, shall we? The original Intern was in over his head, letting Bark call in 2 times in a day. Granted, Bark used a different voice the second time around, but we needed more PROFESSIONALISM in the studio. So that's when I found the current Intern, playing MLB the Show at Target. He's done so well over the year, and was providing so many HOT Twins takes for the show... But apparently being an Intern wasn't enough for him... He wanted MORE, and to get that accomplished, tried taking me out of the picture. Long story short, I was locked in a cage over the last 72 hours. With nothing to eat but sunflower seeds, and water from a rusty hose... It was awful, guys. Just know, that every day I was wishing victory for our Twins, and cheered as hard as I could! I wasn't sure if I was going to die in that cage, so I recorded a video of me so you knew what I was going through.... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvVorYh_mng Needless to say, I'm actively hiring for a new Intern. Time to go back to Target and find the next kid playing MLB the Show. In the mean time, I have some calls to catch up on!
  3. Vanimal46
    Happy Monday. Hope everyone's feeling good after a 3 game winning streak! Today is National Animal Crackers Day! Nothing says childhood like animal crackers and juice before nap time... Today is also National Lineman Appreciation Day! Not the lineman in football... The people that keep the power on for us. Could you imagine going back in time 300-400 years ago and not having electricity for everything we do? I mean, we could still have a Twins Daily, but it'd be pretty hard sending letters back and forth as replies... I'd be sitting at home livid until someone replies back about why Max Kepler isn't playing Finally, today is National Columnist's Day! So be nice to Sid Hartman, Patrick Reusse, LaVelle E. Neal, and Phil Miller just for one day...
  4. Vanimal46
    Paging Max Kepler... Paging Max Kepler. Are you still on the MLB team?
  5. Vanimal46
    I'm happy to say the Twins are going to win again today! I'll be out on the golf course and not able to watch the game...
  6. Vanimal46
    Believe me North, there was PLENTY of liquid courage needed to go dancing...
  7. Vanimal46
    Not much is different from your experience in September of 1999, Bark. It was 85 degrees today in Austin... I was certainly sweaty, discombobulated, and NERVOUS as all get out. I'd like to think me being that way made it easier for her to have fun and enjoy the moment... We had some laughs and awkward moments. I went out of my comfort zone by dancing, and she was a great teacher!
  8. Vanimal46
    If you want to start posting on my behalf, you have my permission. You have that power as a moderator, right?
  9. Vanimal46
    Call me old school, but 5 and a half hours together is a win for me on a first date... I've got something planned for her on Sunday! Hopefully it's going to be a good time.
  10. Vanimal46
    You guys! It turned out to be a great night for all of us! 1st win for the Twins! Sorry I missed this historical moment for our favorite ball club... The first date turned out great! Drunk make out sessions are great in their own category, but there's nothing better than a first real kiss with a crush!
  11. Vanimal46
    Tonight's the night guys! For those that have followed the game threads the last couple of days you'll know what I'm talking about. Happy hour is set up after work.. After happy hour dinner is booked! If I don't check in later tonight, you'll know why!
  12. Vanimal46
    Pictured: David Murphy's phone conversation with TR DM: "Thank you for calling Jiffy Lube, this is David." TR: "David, hey this is Terry Ryan with the Minnesota Twins. I see you're doing well with yourself, but I was wondering if you'd like an opportunity to play for us." DM: "I'm not sure Terry, I've got to do an oil change scheduled at 3:30." TR: "I'll tell you what, we'll sign you to a minor league deal, but more than likely you'll be playing on the major league club within a week." DM: "DEAL!"
  13. Vanimal46
    Pictured: Dick Bremer contemplates over the commercial break what silver linings he can say to keep casual fans from changing the channel.
  14. Vanimal46
    Now that Flip is no longer with us (RIP) is there anyone else that could convince Izzo to leave his kingdom at Michigan State and come to the Timberwolves as either the HC or GM? Would we want him to be either one?
  15. Vanimal46
    BREAKING: The Whine Line investigative team discovered an audio clip of Joe Mauer speaking with the High Priests in Haiti! Here is the transcribed conversation: HP: "What is your greatest desire, my son?" JM: "Shucks, I guess I'd want to hit and play 1B at an all-star level." HP: "We can do that for you, son. With a slight side effect for others...MUAHAHAHAHA." JM: (laughs nervously) "Well golly, that'd be great if you can do that! What's the side effect?" HP: "Nothing that will concern you, my son. Now if we don't start the ritual right now, you must leave and never return." JM: "I mean, gosh, I'd like to play great baseball again. Let's get started?" HP: "Wonderful! Jobu will show you what to do." Dun-Dun-DUN!
  16. Vanimal46
    Bark! Welcome back to the show! Your debut call is off to a STRONG start! We're back to conspiracy theories, something that I hold near and dear to my heart. It is pretty strange that Joe Mauer is having a revelation season, while the other players suddenly can not hit a pitch. During the winter I was stalking...er... I mean investigating Miguel Sano in the Dominican Republic to make sure he wasn't cheating on his diet. I should have had someone stalk Joe Mauer too! If he did go to Haiti, I could absolutely believe that he performed voodoo black magic rituals in order to start hitting over .300 again. Did they not tell him that if he goes through with this, that others on his team will lose ALL ability to hit a fastball? They must not have... Your rumor about Eduardo Escobar also makes a TON of sense to me. Both players are doing suspiciously well at the moment, almost TOO good if you catch my drift. MAGIC......
  17. Vanimal46
    Thank you for the call, Platoon. Quite frankly I feel like a piece of my soul is GONE because of the loss of Glen Perkins.. That could also be a reason why the team is struggling right now. Without Perkins, who is the person that can direct the new players on which restaurants are the best places to eat? We all know Joe Mauer is not allowed to leave the house except to go to the ballpark. Especially with twins of his own. He has no idea about all of the new bars and restaurants in town. We NEED Perkins' home town knowledge to show the others the way!
  18. Vanimal46
    Thanks for the call, diehard. I love me a good conspiracy, and this may be the reason why the Twins are starting off 0-9! The bar was set pretty low when the Braves, Reds, and Brewers started signing guys from the California Prison League. Our Twins decided to go a different route by signing players who could strike out every other at-bat! I believe they ARE trying to go 0-162 and be the worst team in MLB history. Hopefully we'll start seeing Rick Vaughn signings in the near future!
  19. Vanimal46
    ANND Welcome Back! To Minnesota Twins Whine Line. Sorry I've been missing some calls as of late. I was on a week long bender, and the intern just bailed me out of jail.... When the Twins start losing, Vanimal starts boozing. I feel like a new man! It's amazing what goes through your head when you're left in a jail cell for 35 minutes. Will I ever get out? Do I need to start creating a shank to protect myself like you see in TV shows? THANKFULLY, the Intern had the $35 bounty to get me out of jail and breathe that FRESH air.... I'll never take freedom for granted again. Anyways, those Twins, huh? What can you say. It's times like these when I pay more attention to the Intern's season on MLB the Show and wonder what could be! Let's return some calls and see what happens the rest of the night.
  20. Vanimal46
    That's because more of us are actually able to drink beer and watch the games at night! Sorry for missing most of this riveting afternoon game...
  21. Vanimal46
    You, good sir, are on FIRE today!
  22. Vanimal46
    Not able to watch the video feed at work... Does the MLB Network or whoever's broadcasting the game have an Audra reporting from the stands?
  23. Vanimal46
    He has risen from the dead! Welcome back to the game threads Bark!!
  24. Vanimal46
    If he could stop resembling Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson and swoon every woman in sight, that's a start.
  25. Vanimal46
    This is A- material Platoon. As much as I want to give you the like, I'm holding out for the whoppers later this afternoon. I've arranged a happy hour at Top Golf after work on Friday where she will be attending. After a few drinks, maybe there will be an after happy hour dinner!
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