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Cap'n Piranha

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Everything posted by Cap'n Piranha

  1. Cap'n Piranha
    Not if the band is Tyrion Lannister and Friends.
  2. Cap'n Piranha
    Because solo acts aren't allowed?
  3. Cap'n Piranha
    Tillman is averaging 11 pitches per out. At this rate, the Orioles will need to throw 297 pitches to complete today's game.
  4. Cap'n Piranha
    It sounds like the Baltimore outfield is rather buffoonish thus far today.
  5. Cap'n Piranha
    Bert always gets his California math correct.
  6. Cap'n Piranha
    Dammit, you just jinxed him! What's the matter with you?
  7. Cap'n Piranha
    Which reminds me of the time in college my fraternity brother got drunk and started telling women he was an "FBI". It went well--until it didn't.
  8. Cap'n Piranha
    Not only that, the bum didn't even get on base!
  9. Cap'n Piranha
    Man these Baltimore guys are just as bad as ours. Baltimore play-by-play guy: "Well, last year, Berrios was 21. This year, [pause for effect] he's 22."
  10. Cap'n Piranha
    The Baltimore color guy is now saying he doesn't think Berrios has the best stuff on the Twins staff. I'd love to know who has better.
  11. Cap'n Piranha
    Baltimore Color Guy: "I don't think Berrios is as good as his numbers right now". Wait, you're saying Berrios is NOT the greatest pitcher in baseball history? Bold.
  12. Cap'n Piranha
    Two foul pop-outs. Gross. I hope this doesn't come back to haunt us.
  13. Cap'n Piranha
    Cut Gimenez.
  14. Cap'n Piranha
    It took Tillman 8 batters before he got a first pitch strike.
  15. Cap'n Piranha
    In watching Gameday pitch tracks, I don't know that Tillman has thrown a single pitch that would be a called strike yet.
  16. Cap'n Piranha
  17. Cap'n Piranha
    Hey Chief! How ya doin' today?
  18. Cap'n Piranha
    moot point now--nice work Kennys.
  19. Cap'n Piranha
    The Baltimore analyst said he thinks Dozier could easily steal home right now, since Machado is almost 60 feet away from the bag. Begging the question--why isn't Dozier doing that?
  20. Cap'n Piranha
    I believe he actually started the season opener last year--the rain delay must have prevented him from going at least 5.
  21. Cap'n Piranha
    Baltimore play-by-play guy; "Now, Minnesota is the one team that Tillman has never beat. I kid you not"
  22. Cap'n Piranha
    So for fun, I'm listening to the Baltimore broadcast. They're starting out by playing radio clips of previous games--since it's the same play-by-play guy introducing the clips that is in the clips, I'm very confused on whether or not the game has started.
  23. Cap'n Piranha
    Prank #2. I worked for a major retailer, and once a month we had to meet with senior management to update them on our team's financial performance. A couple days before this meeting, we discovered that one of our buyers had a Goo Goo Dolls songs as a ringtone for when his fiance called. I downloaded the same ringtone to my phone, ensured I sat next to the buyer in question, and had another buyer call me in the middle of the meeting--the first buyer was so panicked and embarrassed by his inability to stop the song from playing he literally fell out of his chair.
  24. Cap'n Piranha
    During college, I worked at MSP airport as a baggage handler. Once we had a new guy, and told him the next flight had a number of oversized bags, and we would therefore need a "bin stretcher" (a bin being the name for the baggage compartments in the bottom of the plane). We took it to the next level by letting him know that we didn't own one, so he would need to go to United to borrow theirs. Once he left, we called United, told them the gag, and had them send him onto another airline. An hour and 6 airlines later, he returned, very embarrassed he was unable to complete the task set for him.
  25. Cap'n Piranha
    Because they're very situation dependent. A triple is better than a single, but judging by RBI, a single with the bases loaded that scores two is better than a triple, or for that matter, a homer, that comes with the bases empty. RBI's should be used, but should be used in conjunction with some sort of rate stat that details how often a player gets to bat with runners on.
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