formerly33

How hard did your pitchers throw? Edit: or perhaps you'll give the same reply you gave for your dog ... Don't let that beard deceive you. It's a she.

Will the Twins sign Harper when he reaches FA in 2019, or will his agent demand no less than $500 mill? The answer, my friend, is not yes.

You're doing good, but you missed one factor. 1700/12=x And I think we can safely factor in decline, etc. etc. But, for simplicity's sake, we'll leave that out of a game thread. This could turn into quite the discussion in any other thread, though ... how many career hits will Joe Mauer accumulate? This question has me thinking ...

It would be an understatement to say that this ad was successful at auto redirects if that had happened.

Considering that by the end of this season Joe will be averaging about 150 hits a year, I don't think it would be unreasonable to expect him to get his 3,000th by the time he's Torii Hunter's age. Simple matter of arithmetic, my friend ... or should I say ... elementary? And, I might add, we might want to give him a huge contract extension.

****ity ****ity **** **** ****. ****.

Mauer Power. Just think ... if they hadn't scored that last run ... dammit.

I did not. I said "****" ... oh **** ... it censored it again.

I think it's lyrics to a song or something... Like ****ity ****ity ***. <casts severe glance SSo1's way> Does that even remotely resemble what I said?

This thread is suffering from banausic language syndrome. I'll spice it up a bit and then maybe the Twins will listen. ****ity **** **** ****.

Is this what we used to call Twinning?

Well, considering that I didn't ask two questions in one sentence, I'll pardon you this time for failing to reply "yes."

I have an idea. Trevor Plouffe should stop trying because when he does well, he raises fans' expectations to an unattainable level and then they are more likely to be disappointed when he GIDP. And, as an athlete, your best interests lie in living up to expectations and not disappointing fans. Correct?

Santana would have caught .... oh wait. I can't say that anymore? That was half the fun of watching.

I thought you were going to say accumulatively.

Since there have been about 20 or so songs about Tigers posted thus far, I'll contribute to the best of my abilities. How Tigers Cry by Walking Eagle I can't seem to find it anywhere online. Look it up on Spotify if you want to listen ... not exactly my style, but the name is fitting.

I never made a habit of randomly shouting at helicopters before, but this might be a good trend. They seem to be going just fine. http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FsSSDPwmbgw/Tc-SqffzORI/AAAAAAAAAE4/-k4KQSRNLkc/s1600/Black+Hawk+Chopper+%25286%2529.jpg

That was the Packers talking, bro.

Who ... myself?

Sunday 9/13, 1:10 PM CT at U.S. Cellular Field TV: FS-N; Radio: Go 93-3, TIBN, BOB FM Weather: Sunny, with a high near 70. West wind 5 to 10 mph. Now that's the kind of weather I like ... not that I'm in Chicago ... but the weather up here is pretty similar. Unfortunately, Chicago and St. Paul alike are going to warm up again. Oh well ... can't rush the seasons. I'll simply have to wait. Lineups: TWINS (73-68): 1. Hicks CF 2. Dozier 2B 3. Mauer 1B 4. Sano DH 5. Plouffe 3B 6. Hunter RF 7. Rosario LF 8. Suzuki C 9. Escobar SS Kyle Gibson, RHP (9-10, 3.87 ERA) WHITE SOX (67-73): 1. Eaton CF 2. Saladino SS 3. Abreu DH 4. Laroche 1B 5. Thmpson RF 6. Shuck LF 7. Olt 3B 8. Flowers C 9. Johnson 2B Chris Sale, LHP (12-8, 3.31 ERA) Alright ... I need to think of five things for you to think about ... let me see .... 1. Chicago -- There are two things that Chicago has over Minnesota: hockey and hotdogs. When it comes to hockey ... well, that's just a regrettable fact that only time can change. However, when it comes to hotdogs and ketchup (or, better phrased, hotdogs and NO ketchup), Minnesota will never learn to do it the Chicagoan way. We just don't seem to be progressive enough to change that. In my most humble opinion, Chicagoans know the real (and only) way to eat a hotdog. But nobody seems to want to hear this ... must be a pride issue or something. (Alright ... I kid ... but seriously, ketchup on a dog is absurd.) 2. Speaking of Chicago, the Bears are playing this afternoon as we Vikings fans patiently await Monday night. Obviously I’m not a Bears fan, but … well, go Bears! You know why. 3. White Sox -- I always wonder why the Sux call themselves the White Sox but wear black sox instead. Maybe it’s in honor of the 1919 World Series … who knows? The South Siders pride themselves in being more knowledgeable of their team’s history than the inhabitants of the North Side. Or maybe it’s their never ending desire to do everything wrong. Like I said, who really knows? 4. Gibson vs. Sale -- If these were the only two pitchers in the AL, Sale would win the Cy Young award by a landslide. Luckily that’s not the case, and we don’t have to worry about one of those bloody South Siders taking that award this year, but the fact remains that if the World Series was decided by voting and the only contenders were the Twins and the Sox, we would win by a landslide. At least one would hope. And again, luckily that is not the case. But the point is that it doesn't really matter who's got the better players or who's got the better teams because of fluky games. Yesterday was a fluky game ... the Twins should have been able to win it. Let's hope for another fluky game today, because Sale should be able to win it. Sigh ... that was supposed to make sense, but it doesn't really. I just feel really dumb this morning ... so tired. Anyway ... 5. Nothing -- I know that I'm supposed to talk about the game at hand for the first four and then something else for the fifth, but my mind is drawing a blank (per usual), and I can't for the life of me think of anything worth talking about. Hotdogs ... Black Sox ... it's all the same. I'm glad this season is almost over ... I know we're technically still in the race, but I wrote the Twins off after the Yanks swept us last month, and though I had fun during the Royals series, for instance, I just don't see us making it. Oh well ... it was fun while it lasted. But I can't help but be a little sad about the playoffs thing. Oh well ... exit baseball, enter music. I'm going to the SPCO concert at the new Ordway with Hrb and a few other family members this afternoon. I took one look at the program and decided that I was going to that concert. To the rest of my family who had to miss out because I got dibs on the ticket before they had a chance ... sorry, but not sorry.

I agree ... I'm sure it was unintentional. I'm sure Rosario knew that too and wasn't bothered in the least. How many times have people said "How's it going?" and you didn't respond? Maybe none ... but people space out sometimes. It's a fact of life. Start thinking about something else and you completely tune out everything else, even if just for a moment. I can't say this conclusively, of course ... but imho it's not a matter of concern.

I figured out a couple months ago who killed JFK (it's top secret ... don't ask or I might tell), but I was still at a loss when it came to Lincoln. NOW I KNOW!!!

Concur.

That's explainable because the older you grow, the less you remember. At least that's the case in my family ... I'm doomed when it comes to Alzheimer's ... especially with my bad eating/sleeping habits. Well, actually I consider my sleeping habits to be better than some (if not most), but when it comes to eating ... I'll admit I'm not the person you want to model yourself after. My family accuses me of being anorexic, but I'm not, really. I just forget to eat. Though ... that's probably a common anorexic excuse, so I shouldn't even try to convince you. My sisters are constantly saying, "Always, you're not fat." I know I'm not fat. I don't need to be told that ... but they think I'm anorexic and probably googled the best things to say to anorexic people. It gets a little old. But the favorite is, "You don't want to end up like Terri Shiavo, do you?" Hmm ... next time I think I'll respond that no, I don't ... can you please take care of me when I go into a coma? Their expressions will be truly priceless.

WHAT??!! Chief doesn't remember JFK's assassination?! Were you asleep? You must have been at least 92 then. Somehow I feel like I shouldn't post that ... as if it's somewhat disrespectful to switch moods suddenly. Maybe? Will you forgive me?