John Kelsey

Wouldn't have been a good day to try to get started on the write up early, I don't envy you, Tom.

You would think after six years on the team, folks here could spell Duffey correctly. And Romo is probably around sixth on the list of guys I trust in the bullpen.

I've been pretty shocked that he's continued to get so many first pitches in the zone. It may be what you're suggesting that teams don't want to give him a free pass, but he's shown a penchant for getting himself out over the years. I wouldn't be surprised if they started to throw him a few breaking balls out of the zone with the first two pitches and see if he can lay off with the way he's been approaching ABs lately.

The Yankees lineup is still really good. However, the rotation is pretty beatable when Cole isn't pitching. Severino, German, and Paxton are done for the year which leaves them with Tanaka and a bunch of question marks. In the pen, Kahnle is also out for the year and Ottavino has been disastrous.

Agreed, Buxton has been swinging really early in counts and making contact which has helped his power, but has resulted in him drawing 1(!) walk all year. Not exactly what you want from the leadoff guy.

Fair enough, I'll readily admit that I was watching the Twins ABs closer and only checked the charts against Twins batters in comparison to last night. I guess we'll call it even.

After a frustrating first two games in Chicago, the Twins managed to take a victory thanks to bombas and the bullpen. Eddie Rosario, Byron Buxton and Miguel Sanó all hit home runs while the bullpen combined to throw 5 1/3 perfect innings after Jake Odorizzi’s early exit.Box Score Odorizzi: 3.2 IP, 2 H, 1 ER, 1 BB, 3 K Home Runs: Rosario (11), Buxton (10), Sanó (12) Top 3 WPA: Stashak .159, Buxton .125, Odorizzi .120 Win Probability Chart (via FanGraphs): Download attachment: Winchart.png Roster Shuffling Before the game, the Twins optioned Randy Dobnak and Travis Blankenhorn in order to activate Jake Odorizzi and Alex Avila. The two newly-activated Twins served as the pitching battery in a game that pitted Odorizzi vs. Lucas Giolito. On top of being an enticing pitching matchup, “Odorizzi vs. Giolito” sounds like it could have been a scene in the Five Families War portion of “The Godfather'', but I digress. An untimely finger injury ultimately forced Odorizzi out of the game after allowing just one run in 3 2/3 innings. Twins Get to Giolito Again Coming into the game, the Twins had hit Lucas Giolito better than any other team, having scored 11 runs in just 8 2/3 innings against the Chicago ace, while other teams had combined for 15 runs in 51 2/3 innings. Giolio pitched better this evening than in his previous two outings against The Twins, but Minnesota continued to make solid contact when it counted, mashing two home runs against the big righty. Of the seven home runs Giolito has allowed this year, five have been hit by the Twins. Byron Buxton, whose homer gave the Twins a 3-0 lead has now slugged five home runs in his last eight games. Bullpen Perfection The Twins got much-needed, flawless outings from three members of their bullpen following the abbreviated start from Odorizzi. Cody Stashak and Tyler Duffey turned in shutout, multi-inning performances, combining for 4 1/3 innings pitched with four strikeouts and no baserunners allowed. Trevor May was handed the ninth inning and in an effort to one-up his teammates, struck out the side to close out the win. Have a Game, Ump I don’t think I’ve ever written this when recapping a baseball game before, but I have to give kudos to home plate umpire Nic Lentz who delivered one of the best umpired games I can remember watching. It may have only stood out because it was following his colleague Will Little’s horror show from the night before, but better late than never. Tip of the cap to you, Mr. Lentz. Little last night: Lentz tonight: Download attachment: Ump0916.png Division Race Tightens With the victory, the Twins trimmed Chicago’s division lead to two games and improved their chances of winning the division to 33%, according to FiveThirtyEight. With Kenta Maeda taking the ball tomorrow afternoon, a series split is looking feasible and a week that began with some ominous signs is looking like it could turn around in a hurry. Bullpen Usage Spreadsheet Download attachment: Bullpen.png Click here to view the article

I think it has to be Bieber at this point. Weird year for hitters in the AL with the best candidates being a DH and two Angels players. Maybe throw in Tim Anderson if he can get hot at the end but he's pretty short on PAs.

Watching the game today should answer that question.

After taking the first game 2-0, the Twins trailed 2-1 heading into the final inning of the second leg of their doubleheader against the Tigers. Jorge Polanco drove in the game-tying run with his fifth hit of the day in the seventh inning before Marwin Gonzalez drove in the go-ahead run in the eight.Game 1: Twins 2, Tigers 0 (7 innings) Box Score Dobnak: 5.0 IP, 4 H, 0 ER, 1 BB, 4 K Home Runs: Polanco (4), Donaldson (2) Top 3 WPA: Dobnak .329, Donaldson .107, Rogers/Duffey .083 Win Probability Chart (via FanGraphs): Download attachment: Winchart1.png Game 2: Twins 3, Tigers 2 (8 innings) Box Score Wisler: 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 ER, 1 BB, 3 K Home Runs: None Top 3 WPA: Polanco .526, Gonzalez .256, May .222 Win Probability Chart (via FanGraphs): Download attachment: Winchart2.png The Twins squeaked out two close, low-scoring games and came away with a sweep in a doubleheader against Ron Gardenhire and the Detroit Tigers on Friday at Target Field. Rooker Time This morning, the Twins moved Max Kepler to the 10-day injured list with a left adductor strain which allowed them to promote Brent Rooker from their alternate training site in St. Paul. Rooker is a 25-year old out of Mississippi State who posted a .933 OPS in AAA last season with 14 home runs in just 228 at-bats. Rooker started both games in right field and got his first career hit…...by pitch before being substituted for Byron Buxton’s defense toward the end of the first game. In game 2, he notched his first hit and RBI on a sharp 112.2 MPH line drive to left to put the Twins up 1-0. For the purposes of this article, I’m just going to choose to ignore that each time the Tigers made contact while Rooker was in the field, I held my breath and hoped it wasn’t going to right field, not unlike in a beer league softball game. Twins pitchers cruise through Game 1 With Kepler out and Byron Buxton and Eddie Rosario taking a seat with Mathew Boyd on the mound, the Twins trotted out a Rooker-Cave-Gonzalez outfield in Game 1 that was reminiscent of the cast of Caddyshack 2 when compared to the original. The Twins kicked things off with a pair of home runs from Jorge Polanco and Josh Donaldson and that would be all they needed as Randy Dobnak, Tyler Duffey, and Taylor Rogers combined to shut out the Tigers offense in a game that only took 1 hour and 45 minutes to complete. After Randy Dobnak allowed two baserunners in each of the first two innings, the Twins pitching staff hardly broke a sweat. Dobnak settled down and cruised through five innings throwing just 61 pitches and lowering his season ERA to 2.72. It certainly didn’t hurt to get a little defensive help from Josh Donaldson to close out the fourth. Dobnak’s start was followed by a dominant two-strikeout inning from Tyler Duffey. Taylor Rogers then worked around a leadoff single to preserve the shutout and notch his eighth save of the season. Other than the two home runs in the first inning, the Twins offense was mostly held in check by lefty Matthew Boyd for the second time this week. Boyd has been awful this year, but in his last two starts against the Twins he has struck out 14 batters in 12 innings and allowed just three earned runs. Twins come from behind and score in extras in Game 2 In Game 2, the Twins scored in extra innings, in their own ballpark, but did not get to celebrate a walk-off win. The Twins were the road team in their home park, as they were making up a game that was scheduled to be played in Detroit earlier in the season. The Twins did their part to make the Tigers feel at home by using the Detroit home intro video and using the Tigers colors on the video board, which is about as comforting as hanging pictures from your house in a hostel that you’re staying in for six hours. Twins fans were subjected to another bullpen game in Game 2, which was started by the suddenly unhittable slider machine Matt Wisler. As good as Wisler was, for my sake and my therapist's sake, I hope it was the last bullpen game of the year. It started to come unraveled in a third inning that can only be described as “gross”. Sean Poppen actually pitched adequately in the inning, but a few misplays from players out of their natural positions allowed the Tigers to score the only two runs they would get all day. The offense continued to provide very little punch in the second game of the doubleheader against another Tiger lefty in Tyler Alexander. Despite collecting 11 hits in the game, the Twins did not have a single extra base hit after the two home runs in the first inning of Game 1 and did not draw a walk ALL DAY(!!!) until the seventh inning of the second game. Miguel Sano finished a very forgettable day 0-for-7 at the plate with five strikeouts and a GIDP. Jorge Polanco was the biggest bright spot, racking up four singles in Game 2, including a game-tying knock, to finish 5-for-7 on the day. After Polanco’s base hit to tie the game in the top of the seventh, Marwin Gonzalez came through with the winner on a ground ball up the middle in the top of the eighth. The Twins took advantage of having a baserunner on second at the start of the inning to push the winning run across, and as an added bonus we all got to watch Willians Astudillo round third base again. Avila injury Not everything was coming up Milhouse for the Twins on Friday though. Alex Avila was pulled from the second game with the same lower back tightness that prevented him from finishing his last start behind the plate. With Mitch Garver already out indefinitely and with Avila likely headed to the IL, expect to see a lot more of Ryan Jeffers and even some starts for Willians Astudillo at catcher in the coming weeks (gulp). Bullpen Usage Spreadsheet Download attachment: Bullpen.png Postgame Pint Immediately following the sweep, John Bonnes, Matthew Trueblood and David Youngs discussed the games with a live virtual audience. Download The Postgame Pint Podcast You can also listen to the Postgame Pint and never miss another one. Just head over to our iTunes page and subscribe. Every morning you'll have a new episode waiting for you. Or listen wherever you download your favorite podcasts. Click here to view the article

Romo is maybe the 5th or 6th best reliever on the team, hopefully Rocco starts treating him as such.

How much you want to put on the Twins making the playoffs?

I'm not too worried about Rogers but I've thought Duffey should be the closer since the beginning of the year, he's just the better pitcher. I'd have Duffey at closer with Romo and Rogers working 7th/8th and occasional save chances.

A week ago, things were looking rosy in Minnesota sports land. Fast forward to today, the Twins are on a four game losing streak, the Wild crashed out of the playoffs and lost the draft lottery, the Timberwolves sill exist, and the Gopher football team went from losing their best receiver to likely losing their entire season. Perhaps tonight is the night for the Twins to turn this ship around. I follow the Twins very closely, but I rarely, if ever, sit down and watch an entire Twins game uninterrupted. With the Twins playing their Wisconsin “rivals” to the east, and with nothing better to do on a Monday, I figured I’d jot down my thoughts as I take in a game and avoid going outside on a perfectly lovely 78 degree night. I’m coming to you from my living room in Minneapolis, about 2 miles away from Target Field and roughly 50 Culver’s locations away from Miller Park. The Twins are sending former angsty Pittsburgh-area teen with dad shoes Randy Dobnak to the mound, and the Brewers will counter with Adrian Houser. It looks like Mitch Garver is out of the lineup again tonight for no other reason than to try to get his head right and reset from his horrific slump at the plate. Naturally I drafted Garver in my fantasy baseball draft along with two other Twins players. I broke my age-old ‘Don’t draft Twins players too early’ rule and this is what I have to show for it: Josh Donaldson (injured list), Rich Hill (injured list), Mitch Garver (Hasn’t gotten a hit in 8 DAYS!!!! list). Such is life. 6:30 p.m. CT -- The Twins Live pregame show is already trotting out the tired Randy Dobnak Uber storyline in the pregame show. Now that Dobnak is arguably the Twins best starting pitcher, I think it’s time for everyone to move past the cute, “he used to be an Uber driver” story. Unfortunately, I don’t expect it to slow down at all, and therefore I will be starting an UBER COUNTER for all the times they say “Uber” in the broadcast tonight. 6:35 -- UBER COUNTER: 8 7:05 -- I was hoping Justin Morneau would be handling color commentary, but as luck would have it, it looks like Jack Morris is working with Dick Bremer tonight. That’s right. Three hours……. With Jack Morris….I’m trying to stay calm, but….... 7:11 -- One of the things I love about the Brewers is they always have at least one guy on the roster who looks like he could have been out in the tailgating lot pounding beers and sausages before the game. I usually refer to these players as “Brewers Guys” but I think it would be more fun if they created an award for this called “Mr. Brewer” to be handed out each season to the player who most exemplifies what Brewers games are all about. By the way, has there ever been a pro sports franchise whose team name matches the vibe of their team better than the Brewers? They know what their fans are interested in and what makes a Brewers game experience great, and have really leaned into it. When I lived in Wisconsin (2008-2012), they had some all-time great Brewers Guys, including but not limited to: Corey Hart, Prince Fielder, Casey McGehee, and the legend, . After scanning the roster, the 2020 candidates for the Mr. Brewer award don’t seem quite as strong, but I think the best early options would have to be Brandon Woodruff, Justin Smoak, Ben Gamel, and Brett Anderson. Now that I’m thinking of it, Dobnak would be a perfect candidate if he played for the Brewers; more deliberation on this as the night moves along. 7:18 -- After Houser got through the top of the Twins lineup in just eight pitches, Dobnak walked the Brewers leadoff hitter Eric Sogard in four pitches. A sign of good things to come, surely. 7:20 -- It’s a shame that the Brewers best player, Christian Yelich, will never be a candidate for Mr. Brewer. He’s too thin and he’s just too much of a Cali guy. The same was true of Ryan Braun when he was the Brewers best player. 7:22 -- UBER COUNTER: 9 7:24 -- It looks like the Brewers don’t do the cutouts behind home plate that are in vogue right now. I’m just going to assume they have a cardboard cutout of a drunk fan peeing on his seat in the nosebleeds to keep the vibe alive. Side story: I have seen this happen twice in my baseball-going life; once at a Brewers game at Miller Park and once by a White Sox fan at the Metrodome. 7:28 -- END OF FIRST INNING: Tied 0-0 7:35 -- Luis Arraez comes up for the first time. Can we all agree the “Luis Arraez might hit .400” thing was really dumb? I don’t think his slugging percentage will even get to .400 this year. Just as I say that, he slaps the Twins first hit to left field. I guess I’m now committed to criticizing Arraez before each of his at-bats. 7:39 -- GM Thad Levine has joined the broadcast and is talking at length about Byron Buxton’s effervescent smile. Shortly after, Buxton strikes out. No effervescence, for now. 7:45 -- Jack Morris complains about Zoom for the first time. Mark it off on your Jack Morris “Back in my day” bingo card. 7:49 -- Orlando Arcia comes up to the plate for the Brewers. Twins fans may remember his brother Oswaldo as the only Twins outfielder who was somehow worse defensively than Josh Willingham and Delmon Young in the early 2010s. In what I assume was a joint tribute to his brother, Orlando hits one to the wall and allows Eddie Rosario to crash into the wall and not make the catch, putting the Brewers up 1-0. 7:52 -- END OF SECOND INNING: Brewers lead 1-0 8:02 -- GRAND SLAM ALERT: Eddie Rosario atones and hits his fourth career grand slam to put the Twins up 4-1. If Bernie Brewer is not going to go down the slide, I will slide down a flight of stairs. 8:05 -- Terrible hitter Luis Arraez comes to the plate again. (It didn’t work this time, Arraez strikes out.) 8:07 -- Tough to say what the worst local commercial being played on Fox Sports North is these days, but it seems like they have retired the worst of all time aka “the WOAT” from Kinetico: Someday I am going to break into my worst enemy’s house and hang this framed image in their living room: 8:12 -- Justin Smoak is showing signs of a mullet coming from under his helmet, greatly aiding his Mr. Brewer candidacy. I think it has to be down to him and Brett Anderson at this point. 8:13 -- Jack Morris hates social media, mark it on your Bingo cards. 8:14 -- END OF THIRD INNING: Twins lead 4-1 8:29 -- END OF FOURTH INNING: Twins lead 4-1 8:31 -- In an effort to be transparent with my dear readers, I’ll admit I ate dinner throughout the entirety of the fourth inning. Shoutout to my lovely girlfriend Sophie for the rice bowl. I can’t even imagine what newfangled technology from the last 20 years Jack Morris complained about while I was away. 8:45 -- Alex Avila just chased a foul ball in a dead sprint at an eight second 40-yard dash pace, which draws chuckles from the broadcast duo. 8:47 -- Dobnak continues to cruise and has barely broken a sweat on his handlebar mustache. He’s retired eight batters in a row and has only allowed one run through five. 8:48 -- END OF FIFTH INNING: Twins lead 4-1 8:52 -- Byron Buxton strikes out on three pitches against Freddy Peralta and his career 11.9 K/9 rate in the most predictable at-bat result since Buxton struck out on three pitches against James Karinchak earlier in the year. Buxton has struck out in all three at-bats tonight and each one has looked worse than the last. 9:00 -- Elsewhere, the Detroit Fightin’ Gardy’s just beat the White Sox to move to 9-5 on the year. Twins legend Niko Goodrum went 4-4 for the Tigers as they moved into first place. <<<<This is an insane sentence. 9:02 -- UBER COUNTER: 10 9:03 -- I’m removing Ben Gamel from the Mr. Brewer list. With his hair and tattoos he’s got more of an amphetamine-loving biker look than a true Wisconsin party guy look. 9:04 -- END OF SIXTH INNING: Twins lead 4-1 9:06 -- Dick is still holding out hope that the Twins might have fans at their games this year. Who wants to tell him? After looking at these Brewers jerseys for two hours, I’m convinced their sets with updated branding this year are among the best ones they’ve ever had. A huge improvement over everything that featured their 1994-2019 logos. 9:18 -- “First time I’ve broadcast a Milwaukee game without being there, but what I wouldn’t give for two bratwursts and sauerkraut” -Dick Bremer. Same Dick, same. Dick goes on to mention he’s not a fan of the Secret Stadium Sauce at Miller Park. I’ve always liked the sauce and now I’m going down a rabbit hole trying to figure out what it’s made of. 9:20 -- Secret Stadium Sauce has its own Wikipedia page, who knew? Here’s the story: “We were sort of running out of ketchup and mustard, and we needed a condiment. I took barbecue sauce, a little ketchup and mustard and smoked syrup and other ingredients and came up with secret stadium sauce. We said, 'We don't have [ketchup and mustard], but we have secret stadium sauce.' — Rick Abramson 9:25 -- Apparently they didn’t pause the game so I could read up on the Miller Park brat sauce. While I was away, Tyler Duffey worked another scoreless inning. His ERA stays at 0.00 on the year. 9:27 -- END OF SEVENTH INNING: Twins lead 4-1 9:30 -- The Miller Park music crew goes from “Regulate” by Warren G and Nate Dogg (RIP Nate Dogg) right into “Xxplosive” by Dr. Dre. Apparently the eight inning is G-funk inning at Miller Park. The Twins have looked mostly helpless against Freddy Peralta for three innings now. He has six Ks and no hits allowed as we head to the bottom of the eighth. 9:38 -- Swashbucklin’ Sergio Romo is out to pitch the eighth. Romo struggled in his last outing against the Pirates, which is ironic, because he currently looks like one, mixed with Serpico. 9:39 -- “I’m sure a lot of fans are wondering why teams use so many pitchers now. Starters used to go so much deeper into games and maybe they think that was better.” Jack Morris, projecting his own thoughts onto some mysterious “fans” that definitely don’t just exist in his head. 9:45 -- END OF EIGHTH INNING: Twins lead 4-2 9:53 -- As the night (hopefully) begins to wind down, it’s time to hand out the hardware! This year’s Mr. Brewer winner is Brett Anderson! Congrats to Brett for looking like an older version of roughly half of the really drunk guys I went to college with at UW-Eau Claire. 9:56 -- Freddy Peralta’s reign of terror (hopefully) comes to an end. He struck out eight batters in four innings, allowing just one hit. Now for Taylor Rogers time…. 10:00 -- Jedd Gyorko (pronounced Jerk-O) leads off for the Brew Crew. His name will always remind me of the “Jerk Store” episode of Seinfeld. Jerk Store flies out for the first out. Rogers strikes out something called "Mark Mathias" to end it. Phew. 10:10 -- FINAL: TWINS WIN 4-2 Only three hours later, the game is a wrap and the Twins get back in the win column. I wasn’t sure if this format would work for a game article and to be honest, I’m still not, but thank you for reading if you made it this far. I’ll leave you with this image of a brat with Secret Stadium Sauce as we reflect back on better times at the ballpark.

There are no fans in attendance, but Target Field’s impressive sound system will still be put to good use. The player music list for the Twins was recently revealed, so let’s take break down some of these selections. If you have a Spotify account, we've created a playlist for you to listen to it. Just click here.In an effort to break it all down and so this doesn't spin out of control, I’m mainly just going to cover the batting order for the home opener, but I’ve added a few other favorites from the pitchers and bench players, as well as a much-needed walk-up song for manager Rocco Baldelli. STARTERS Max Kepler: I am going to be completely honest here, I don’t know the song and I hardly even listened to the song. Every year I just shake my head when I eventually hear Kepler’s walk-up song. Maximillian is the only legitimately German baseball player in all of Major League Baseball, and I don’t mean ‘was born on a military base and spent the first 6 months of his life in Germany’ German. This man grew up in Berlin, the most notorious clubbing city in all of Europe and probably the world, and he goes with a song by Lil Baby? What I’m looking for here is a grimy, Berlin basement techno club staple, but Kraftwerk and Rammstein would also be fantastic consolation choices. Imagine this scene: Kepler walks up to the plate at Target Field with the bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth against the Yankees and “Du Hast” comes on. Either the Twins win or Vin Diesel’s character from the movie “XXX” charges the field and fights Aroldis Chapman, and I’m not sure which option I’d prefer. All I ask is that you embrace the German, Max. Embrace the German. Josh Donaldson: I would have bet my house on Josh Donaldson having a country song for three reasons. 1. He is originally from Florida. 2. He went to high school and college in Alabama. 3. He looks like this: Download attachment: Donaldson.jpg © John E. Sokolowski-USA TODAY Sports Despite all of these factors, Donaldson goes with the Playboi Carti track. Looking at his walk-up song history he’s cycled through hip hop songs throughout his whole career other than a period in 2015 when he went with “In the Air Tonight” by Phil Collins, after presumably watching The Hangover and gaining a newfound appreciation for Phil’s first single away from Genesis. Never judge a book by its cover, folks. Jorge Polanco: Those of you who have been clamoring for the Dominican version of “Without Me” by Eminem are in luck. The music video even features a teddy bear humping a boombox, what more could you want? Nelson Cruz: Nelson Cruz can do no wrong right now, and that streak continues as he keeps this merengue banger by Juan Luis Guerra as his walk-up music for another season. Juan Luis Guerra also gets bonus points for looking like the type of guy that moms would be really into, like Jimmy Smits or Andy Garcia. Eddie Rosario: Bad Bunny is everywhere right now, not unlike Rosario’s strike zone *ducks*. The Puerto Rican trap artist made it into three different tracks that are included in this list, so it’s not surprising to see Eddie yet again go with a song by his countryman this season. Mitch Garver: It almost goes without saying, but this song is absolutely unimpeachable, so props to Garver for sticking with it for another year. I think it’s natural to worry that any catcher who goes by the nickname “GarvSauce” and whose intro song makes reference to stardom might be heading towards a Pierzynskian-level likability crash, but Garver genuinely seems like a very likable guy. He certainly backed up the song choice with his play last year, so here’s hoping he can do it again. Luis Arraez: First off, I think we need to commend Farruko for wearing a mask in this music video. That, coupled with the rest of the video, which feels like one Eric Wareheim would have made for Major Lazer about 10 years ago, gets some major points for the Twins second baseman. Not that anyone will be there to see it, but I’d love to have this video playing on the video board at Target Field before Arraez’s at-bats instead of a picture of Luis in a Hammer Made shirt. Miguel Sano: Our old pal Ceky Viciny, who you may recognize from Polanco’s song, is back featuring on another NSFW video, this one alongside Rochy RD. Ceky Viciny legitimately sounds like a Dominican Mystikal when his verse starts at the 2:14 mark in the song, which is probably the greatest compliment I could give any artist. Byron Buxton: This song will hit a little too close to home for the home opener as Buxton returns from another injury tonight. Unfortunately Mark Morrison never made a song called “Sustained Health of the Mack” or “The Mack Will be Here Every Day and Promises Not to Run Into Walls”. Alas, the song is a first ballot 1996 R&B hall-of-famer alongside “Pony” by Ginuwine, and one I would never dare complain about. However, I will say Byron set the bar extremely high by picking “Flashlight” by Parliament as a 21-year old rookie in his first season. At that moment, knowing that the best prospect in baseball was a Twins player and more importantly a P-Funk fan, I think I would have given him one of my kidneys. OTHER STANDOUTS Rich Hill: Starting pitchers get walk-up songs too. Unfortunately for them, most fans are still trekking over from Kieran’s or stuffing Dollar Dogs in their pockets and miss the whole affair. I could not wait to see what TeamDad Rich Hill would choose, and I was not at all disappointed to learn that he went with an early ‘90s grunge classic by Pearl Jam. While I do admit that song has some very strong dad energy, I was hoping he would go with something by the Replacements or Hüsker Dü as he attempts to ingratiate himself with his fellow Twin Cities Gen X dads. I’m assuming the guy who had “Dick Mountain” on his players' weekend jersey would prefer the more irreverent ‘Mats, so “Bastards of Young” would have been a strong pick. Randy Dobnak: Of course. Tyler Clippard: Speaking of first ballot 1996 R&B Hall of Famers, every track off of the Fugees album “The Score” meets that criteria. Clippard also pulled a Donaldson and surprised me with this pick. This is not a face that screams Fugees fan, but I’m happy to be wrong in my preconceptions: https://lh5.googleus...8gjbTYANLcAPfLb Kenta Maeda: A much-needed change of pace from Maeda here. My Japanese is a little rusty, so I have no idea what they’re saying but I dig it, right down to the Tom Morello-esque guitar solo. Devin Smeltzer: DEEP CUT ALERT! Smeltzer picking maybe the 4th most popular song on a not very popular Eagles album cracks me up for some reason. The dude does not abide. Aaron Whitefield: Whitefield might not get a single at-bat all year as he’s expected to primarily be used as a pinch-runner until rosters are cut. However, unlike Kepler, I have to give him credit for leaning into his heritage going with Australian artist Day 1. I personally think that “Land Down Under” by Men at Work, while perhaps a little too on-the-nose, would have really popped. Taylor Rogers: I would argue that closer walk-up music may be more important than any other member of the team, and we as Twins fans are in good hands with Taylor Rogers. Picking any song from "Rumours", the album that everyone’s parents own five copies of on vinyl, seems like a can’t miss proposition, but this might be the only track that would work for a closer. Now the question becomes do they have time to play the whole song, or can we just cut to the chase and start it at the bassline around the 3:00 mark? BONUS TRACKS Willians Astudillo “La Tortuga” is still recovering from a bout of COVID-19 so he did not make it back in time to be included for the home opener. by krautrock band Can seems like a fitting choice when he is able to return. Rocco Baldelli The skipper, Rocco Baldelli needs some walk-up music love as well, mainly because he’s shown more interest in music than any of his predecessors combined. Rocco is a noted Phish enthusiast so I think we’ll have to go that route, but I’ll admit to not being much of a “Phan” and therefore not overly qualified to make a pick. My only assumption is that the choice will be over 20 minutes long, will feature a solo from every member of the band, and when you watch it live you’re not sure if they’re still playing the same song about 15 minutes into it. seems to fit the bill. Finally, I would have loved to have had “What You Know About That” by TI playing in the background right as this page loads ala 2005 Myspace pages as a tribute to Joe Mauer, but I’ve been told that was not possible. Turns out I do not know all about that. Click here to view the article

The excitement of the home opener is a bit muted this year, but the excitement surrounding the release of the Twins walk-up song list is virus-proof, judging by the response to this Dustin Morse tweet this afternoon: In an effort to break it all down and so this doesn't spin out of control, I’m mainly just going to cover the batting order for the home opener, but I’ve added a few other favorites from the pitchers and bench players, as well as a much-needed walk-up song for manager Rocco Baldelli. Starters: Max Kepler: “All In” by Lil Baby I am going to be completely honest here, I don’t know the song and I hardly even listened to the song. Every year I just shake my head when I eventually hear Kepler’s walk-up song. Maximillian is the only legitimately German baseball player in all of Major League Baseball, and I don’t mean ‘was born on a military base and spent the first 6 months of his life in Germany’ German. This man grew up in Berlin, the most notorious clubbing city in all of Europe and probably the world, and he goes with a song by Lil Baby? What I’m looking for here is a grimy, Berlin basement techno club staple, but Kraftwerk and Rammstein would also be fantastic consolation choices. Imagine this scene: Kepler walks up to the plate at Target Field with the bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth against the Yankees and “Du Hast” comes on. Either the Twins win or Vin Diesel’s character from the movie “XXX” charges the field and fights Aroldis Chapman, and I’m not sure which option I’d prefer. All I ask is that you embrace the German, Max. Embrace the German. Josh Donaldson: “Shoota” by Playboi Carti I would have bet my house on Josh Donaldson having a country song for three reasons. 1. He is originally from Florida. 2. He went to high school and college in Alabama. 3. He looks like this: Despite all of these factors, Donaldson goes with the Playboi Carti track. Looking at his walk-up song history he’s cycled through hip hop songs throughout his whole career other than a period in 2015 when he went with “In the Air Tonight” by Phil Collins, after presumably watching The Hangover and gaining a newfound appreciation for Phil’s first single away from Genesis. Never judge a book by its cover, folks. Jorge Polanco: “Te Siento en Para” by Liro Shaq ft. Ceky Viciny Those of you who have been clamoring for the Dominican version of “Without Me” by Eminem are in luck. The music video even features a teddy bear humping a boombox, what more could you want? Nelson Cruz: “Soldado” by Juan Luis Guerra Nelson Cruz can do no wrong right now, and that streak continues as he keeps this merengue banger by Juan Luis Guerra as his walk-up music for another season. Juan Luis Guerra also gets bonus points for looking like the type of guy that moms would be really into, like Jimmy Smits or Andy Garcia. Eddie Rosario: “Bendiciones” by Bad Bunny Bad Bunny is everywhere right now, not unlike Rosario’s strike zone *ducks*. The Puerto Rican trap artist made it into three different tracks that are included in this list, so it’s not surprising to see Eddie yet again go with a song by his countryman this season. Mitch Garver: “Shining Star” by Earth, Wind & Fire It almost goes without saying, but this song is absolutely unimpeachable, so props to Garver for sticking with it for another year. I think it’s natural to worry that any catcher who goes by the nickname “GarvSauce” and whose intro song makes reference to stardom might be heading towards a Pierzynskian-level likability crash, but Garver genuinely seems like a very likable guy. He certainly backed up the song choice with his play last year, so here’s hoping he can do it again. Luis Arraez: “Temblor” by Causa, Farruko & El Alfa First off, I think we need to commend Farruko for wearing a mask in this music video. That, coupled with the rest of the video, which feels like one Eric Wareheim would have made for Major Lazer about 10 years ago, gets some major points for the Twins second baseman. Not that anyone will be there to see it, but I’d love to have this video playing on the video board at Target Field before Arraez’s at-bats instead of a picture of Luis in a Hammer Made shirt. Miguel Sano: “Vengo de la Pobreza” by Rochy RD & Ceky Viciny Our old pal Ceky Viciny, who you may recognize from Polanco’s song, is back featuring on another NSFW video, this one alongside Rochy RD. Ceky Viciny legitimately sounds like a Dominican Mystikal when his verse starts at the 2:14 mark in the song, which is probably the greatest compliment I could give any artist. Byron Buxton: “Return of the Mack” by Mark Morrison This song will hit a little too close to home for the home opener as Buxton returns from another injury tonight. Unfortunately Mark Morrison never made a song called “Sustained Health of the Mack” or “The Mack Will be Here Every Day and Promises Not to Run Into Walls”. Alas, the song is a first ballot 1996 R&B hall-of-famer alongside “Pony” by Ginuwine, and one I would never dare complain about. However, I will say Byron set the bar extremely high by picking “Flashlight” by Parliament as a 21-year old rookie in his first season. At that moment, knowing that the best prospect in baseball was a Twins player and more importantly a P-Funk fan, I think I would have given him one of my kidneys. Other standouts: Rich Hill: “Even Flow” by Pearl Jam https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CxKWTzr-k6s Starting pitchers get walk-up songs too. Unfortunately for them, most fans are still trekking over from Kieran’s or stuffing Dollar Dogs in their pockets and miss the whole affair. I could not wait to see what TeamDad Rich Hill would choose, and I was not at all disappointed to learn that he went with an early ‘90s grunge classic by Pearl Jam. While I do admit that song has some very strong dad energy, I was hoping he would go with something by the Replacements or Hüsker Dü as he attempts to ingratiate himself with his fellow Twin Cities Gen X dads. I’m assuming the guy who had “Dick Mountain” on his players' weekend jersey would prefer the more irreverent ‘Mats, so “Bastards of Young” would have been a strong pick. Randy Dobnak: “Take Me Home, Country Roads” by John Denver https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vrEljMfXYo Of course. Tyler Clippard: “Ready or Not” by The Fugees https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aIXyKmElvv8 Speaking of first ballot 1996 R&B Hall of Famers, every track off of the Fugees album “The Score” meets that criteria. Clippard also pulled a Donaldson and surprised me with this pick. This is not a face that screams Fugees fan, but I’m happy to be wrong in my preconceptions: Kenta Maeda: “Hikoutei” by King Gnu https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSv7NbfbtU8 A much-needed change of pace from Maeda here. My Japanese is a little rusty, so I have no idea what they’re saying but I dig it, right down to the Tom Morello-esque guitar solo. Devin Smeltzer: “Outlaw Man” by The Eagles https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Mu0c2iwC2E DEEP CUT ALERT! Smeltzer picking maybe the 4th most popular song on a not very popular Eagles album cracks me up for some reason. The dude does not abide. Aaron Whitefield: “Boss” by Day 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=je6mesy5HEA Whitefield might not get a single at-bat all year as he’s expected to primarily be used as a pinch-runner until rosters are cut. However, unlike Kepler, I have to give him credit for leaning into his heritage going with Australian artist Day 1. I personally think that “Land Down Under” by Men at Work, while perhaps a little too on-the-nose, would have really popped. Taylor Rogers: “The Chain” by Fleetwood Mac https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDG2m5hN1vo I would argue that closer walk-up music may be more important than any other member of the team, and we as Twins fans are in good hands with Taylor Rogers. Picking any song from "Rumours", the album that everyone’s parents own five copies of on vinyl, seems like a can’t miss proposition, but this might be the only track that would work for a closer. Now the question becomes do they have time to play the whole song, or can we just cut to the chase and start it at the bassline around the 3:00 mark? Bonus Tracks: Willians Astudillo: “La Tortuga” is still recovering from a bout of COVID-19 so he did not make it back in time to be included for the home opener. “Turtles Have Short Legs” by krautrock band Can seems like a fitting choice when he is able to return. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=my8T7hB992k Rocco Baldelli: The skipper, Rocco Baldelli needs some walk-up music love as well, mainly because he’s shown more interest in music than any of his predecessors combined. Rocco is a noted Phish enthusiast so I think we’ll have to go that route, but I’ll admit to not being much of a “Phan” and therefore not overly qualified to make a pick. My only assumption is that the choice will be over 20 minutes long, will feature a solo from every member of the band, and when you watch it live you’re not sure if they’re still playing the same song about 15 minutes into it. “Everything’s Right” seems to fit the bill. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unFQogrCsrs Finally, I would have loved to have had “What You Know About That” by TI playing in the background right as this page loads ala 2005 Myspace pages as a tribute to Joe Mauer, but I’ve been told that was not possible. Turns out I do not know all about that.

Mize, Manning, and Skubal are fun, the Tigers at least have some hope there, unlike the Royals.

Jeter was overrated, but I'd pretty thrilled if he ended up being Derek Jeter.

I've seen that comp before, and he kind of looks like him and has that star quality like Jeets had, which certainly feeds into it. Lewis is a different kind of athlete though.

I don't trust Graterol at all at Yankee Stadium, I wouldn't have him on the roster.

Gerrit Cole had low K numbers until he was 27.