Blake

Lineup go here: (I hope) Pitching: Twins: Ervin Santana (RHP) Yankees: Nathan Eovaldi (RHP)

I've been trying to come up with a reason why the Twins have had such trouble with the Yankees over the years. I've gone through a dozen theories and each one has been discarded for one reason or another. Finally, I think I hit on the real reason: Broadway. I think the Big Apple (as opposed to the Minneapple..yes, I lived in MN during that campaign) and Broadway have combined to seduce our starting 9 into thinking their true future lies with the lights on Broadway. How do I know this? I recently caught this exchange between a couple of players: (names have been concealed, for obvious reasons) Player 1: As he smooths his well-coiffed locks, "I've been approached by Axe to be a hair model. But first, I need to do some stage work. It must be karma, because the Yankees are in town and one of the players said he could get me an audition!" Player 2: Batting helmet falls off as he walks with Player 1, "Wow, that sounds like fun. But we've got practice today. In fact, don't you have to work with Bruno on going opposite field today?" (waits while Davis brings helmet) Player 1: Again, smoothing his hair, "Practice isn't a problem. Bruno wrote me a note, excusing me from BP today. Besides, a chance like this doesn't come along very often. Also, I don't want to risk messing up my hair before my audition." Player 2: Puts helmet on head, it promptly falls off again, "Bruno wrote you a note? Really? That seems a bit, ummm, odd, shall we say?" Player 1: Putting more gel on hair while chatting, "Well, I have a note and Bruno's signature is on it, what more do I need?" Player 2: "Hand me my helmet, will you?" "Anyway, this whole Broadway thing sounds like a setup or something. How do you know this is legit?" Player 1: "Look at this note I received from Axe! See, the official Axe logo and everything is on it!" Player 2: "Wow, I'll bet that's every bit as legitimate as your note from Bruno!" Player 1: "I know, right? Oh, wait..well, I'm going anyway!" Player 2: Puts helmet under arm for now, "Okay, we'll see you at the game this evening." Some things to think about: 1. First, a confession: I was supposed to do the thread yesterday and forgot. 2. Today is Father's Day. Bring back a win against the Evil Empire, Twins! 3. I'm getting this thread up early so as to not risk the wrath of ChiTown. 4. Sigh. 5. Go Twins!!

Yeah, it's not a nice even number like 20-50.

Volunteers can be fired? Learn something new every day....

Your's truly forgot to post the thread before he left for the day. Thanks for stepping in.

With the way the Twins are playing, I'm surprised the Yankees don't walk Kepler to load the bases, considering the bases loaded futility of the Twins.

Not necessarily. Could create a new username.

Unreal.

As a Twins Fan, this video just spoke to me. Brought a tear to my eye, it did.

I think the proper term is" quaking with laughter."

Drat, wait too long. Oh well. Lineups: Yankees: 1. Jacoby Ellsbury CF 2. Rob Refsnyder 1B 3. Carlos Beltran RF 4. Alex Rodriguez DH 5. Starlin Castro 2B 6. Chase Headley 3B 7. Didi Gregorius SS 8. Austin Romine C 9. Aaron Hicks LF Twins: 1. Eduardo Nunez DH 2. Joe Mauer 1B 3. Robbie Grossman LF 4. Brian Dozier 2B 5. Trevor Plouffe 3B 6. Eduardo Escobar SS 7. Max Kepler RF 8. Kurt Suzuki C 9. Byron Buxton CF

Lineups to follow.

And we're off...yes, a new game thread and a new day of Twins baseball! (insert approximately 2,000 words of positive remarks regarding the Twins. And if you don't know what they are, I'm not going to tell you. I'm not going to do all the work. Sheesh. Oh, all right, here's a hint: battled their tails off, got after it) Over a third of the way through the season and what can we say about Twins baseball? I think Thomas Hulce (Mozart) said it best in "Amadeus:" Antonio Salieri(Mozart rival): How... Did my work please you? Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: I never knew that music like that was possible! Antonio Salieri: You flatter me Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: No, no! One hears such sounds, and what can one say but... 'Salieri.' Some things to think about: 1. Robbie Grossman opted out of the Cleveland system and signed with the Twins. Since joining the Twins MLB club, Robbie Grossman is leading all AL left fielders, posting the following: Average:303, OBP:441, SLG:573, OPS:1.014 (Source: MLB.com) 2. Robbie Grossman has been penciled into the All Star game by me, because I think the idea is hilarious. 3. Robbie Grossman is only 26. 4. Interestingly, Joe Maur, in the last 30 days, has posted the following: Average:300, OBP:400, SLG:.470, OPS:.853, putting him #4 among all AL 1B for the last 30 days. 5. I ran out of relevant thoughts and am too lazy to write some irrelevant thoughts. You're on your own. Pitching for the Twins: Pat Dean (LHP) Pitching for the Evil Empire known as The Yankees:Masahiro Tanaka (RHP)

I don't get it either.

Arcia is a victim of poor management of the 40 man roster. I think Arcia was further victimized by poor lineup management by Paul Morlitor. I wish Arcia nothing but the best. Gad, could we be looking at Ortiz 2.0?

I'm responsible for the next three game threads. So far, I've seen absolutely no reason to change anything I've written. And I wrote the openers a while ago.

After living in MN for so many years, I laugh when people complain about the cold here. A cold night during the winter is 28 f. (roughly -2 Celsius for those who use those weird metric units, not that there's anything wrong with that..) I see people bundled up in winter coats suitable for the frozen north. Meanwhile, I'm wearing a sweatshirt. (yeah, I've become a cold weather wimp, relatively speaking)

I thought it was more like "time some things were left in the past." Just like this season needs to be in the rear view mirror ASAP.

This is a new one, a discussion about golf in a baseball thread.

Yeah, but the puppy has a chance to outgrow the problem.

What, exactly, is left to rescue?

Style? Sense of humor? The girl?

Hey, at least you tuned in late for the carnage. Can't say the same for the rest of us.

Looks like Twins FO material. Hire them!

You should see some of the car hacks. It's downright scary what can be hacked in a car and how helpless the driver becomes.