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Now if we can only make it to 50 pages...

We're crossing the streams?

Go Twins!

Just as long as he doesn't look lost at first... (and welcome to page 32...)

Being 14 wasn't a bad time for me. Coincidentally, it was when i last lived in MN as well...

What did he win? (I don't know, 3rd base?)

And i guess i'm glad folk here warned me about national black outs on mlb. Not sure if i'll just be listening to it all, or i'll find someplace to watch on local tv, but if i'm listening, i'll probably decide to do something away from the computer. You all will have to maintain my steady stream of inanity for me! Well, not really. But do take good care of the game in my absence!

Yup. All Donaldsons live up to expectations. Sadly ours is out for this series, making room for Kirilloff's call up, as i understand it. (full details, check Seth's article what i am too lazy to link to...

Some days ago, i entered into a dark forest and couldn't figure out what would be the most epickest of game thread intros to start off. Homer had already written the Illiad and Oddyssey (before he got DFA'd), and well, the Aeneid, i suppose might have worked well in '65 when the memory of the move from Washington was fresh in folks' minds, but this is 2020 when people just don't have the attention span for such long poetic forms. But Dante's work at least has thematic points i can hit, and be on my way. Post season = after life, or something like that. And he had a 3 game series too, before he got to the end of his journey. So onward... Game 1: "Abandon Hope all ye who enter here!" Leastwise, mere smeer hope won't get the job done... (I think that's as much as i thought about that. We're just travelors passing through) But more appealing are the halls of Hrothgar being ransacked every night by a cunning old monster that tears limbs off and whatnot, which more accurately recounts our recent post season experience. Yeah, now that fits! So fill your meade bowls, put a few more logs on the hearth, as we wait to see the epic battle between Beo-Cruz and Greinkdol... Indeed, Greinke with his formative years in KC is a most interesting opponent. I saw a bit of game 7 last year when he held Washington down, and wished they'd let him stay in. He was fun to watch, as he eschewed this whole "hide the grip you are using from the batter in your glove" that everyone does, as he could throw what he wanted using the same grip. Houston: 0. Zack Greinke (R ) P 1. George Springer (R ) CF 2. Jose Altuve (R ) 2B 3. Michael Brantley ( L) DH 4. Alex Bregman (R ) 3B 5. Kyle Tucker ( L) LF 6. Yuli Gurriel (R ) 1B 7. Carlos Correa (R ) SS 8. Josh Reddick ( L) RF 9. Martin Maldonado (R ) C Twins: 0. Kenta Maeda (R ) P 1. Luis Arraez ( L) 2B 2. Byron Buxton (R ) CF 3. Max Kepler ( L) RF 4. Nelson Cruz (R ) DH 5. Eddie Rosario ( L) LF 6. Miguel Sano (R ) 1B 7. Jorge Polanco ( S ) SS 8. Ryan Jeffers (R ) C 9. Marwin Gonzalez ( S ) 3B Man, i wish i knew more about Gilgalmesh, or the 3 kingdoms, or... well, i'm sure there are many other epics out there i don't know well enough to draw upon. And honestly, i'm not sure i can't help but make fun of whatever i borrow. This could well be the beginning of Marco Pollo's journey to the far east in search of that illusive coop of chicken dinners. I'd like to think it'll be as smooth as silk...

I'm gonna be contrary, and post the game thread intro i'd prepared anyway. Not that it's any better than this one. In fact, it is distinctly worse, not existing in time to accommodate folk who want to comment on the game that early. But we was given to understand that game threads go up ~an hour before game time so as not to tread to much on the toes of the pregame notes (indeed, that somewhat alleviates us writer types from havin' to pay close enough attention to how the team is doin' to make intelligent commentary thereupon) Anyway, i know there are thread mergin' superpowers that will be wielded momentarily to make me look good. Or at least not as bad as i normally look, so that said, i'm totally fine with this post disappearing.

And if it hasn't been pointed out yet, Buxton's batting second in today's line up. He must have had a speedier recovery than Donaldson...

I like to think that means their speed of recovery is relativistic. Look for them to be slightly younger than they would have been if they had recovered at a normal pace. (and just to head off the question, no, it has no observable effects on Buxton's service time)

Sorry i'm late. What i miss?

I am disappointed in losing our consecutive safety streak... Apparently Chief was right.

Winnah.

Oh well. Don't get a 9th double. Lilly doesn't get gilded today...

Hip Hip...

Buxton gets that.

Yeah, it is unfortunate...

And to honor the prevelance of doubles here...

Er... maybe next time.

He'll make it to 2nd eventually, i'm sure.

That is a chief draw for me too.

No, i think this is an omen...

My bad. I guess i just haven't watched it enough...