Riverbrian

Ok... I'm sold!!! You're hired!!!

That's awesome... I would wear that

Dash Wrist Watch?

Ummm...Bakered Baking... Baking

That's what I wear when I'm baked

I was going to put a sun dial on my wrist.

You have 8 of them... That's plenty

I can't imagine this Ham Flavored coffee selling decently.

I did not think of that... That's Brilliant. You know... It's pretty clear to me. You could have helped me out on a lotta things like that... If I would have known you earlier. Let me ask you this question... When I need an oil change? How do you change Oil? I mean Oil is Oil right? It won't change into a Salad Dressing

Dodge Dart Baby

Daylight savings time... Just means that I have to get a new watch because I don't know how to change the time on my old one. I get a new watch twice a year

His Girlfriend was a slut?

This is the only way I'm going to be able to find out what my favorite flavor is. I'll have Butter Toffee in the morning and the Next Morning... I'll have Vanilla Whatever. But I can't decide which one I liked better because I've already forgotten what the Butter Toffee tasted like.

I don't know why the entire Eastern time population doesn't move to Kansas. They could at least watch Letterman or Kimmel at a decent hour.

And in this very location... The LUAWC Queen will post the lineups and WX. The LUAWC Queen just got home from work. I'm blocks from Draft Town, and if you think Chicago traffic is a mess on normal days, oy, it's just getting worse and will be so through the big event. But that has nothing to do with the game tonight in Seattle. So here goes. Game-time forecast: 54 deg F, mostly cloudy with a chance of rain (4-26% depending on where you look, but I'd say at game time the percentage will be down to 4%, coming down from 26% the hour earlier), winds from the SSW at 10mph. Lineups: TWINS Santana SS Hunter RF Mauer 1B Dozier 2B Vargas DH Plouffe 3B Arcia LF Suzuki C Schafer CF Hughes P MARINERS Jackson CF Smith DH Cano 2B Cruz RF Seager 3B Ackley LF Morrison 1B Zunino C Miller SS King Felix P

It's a late one tonight as we open up a series with the Seattle Mariners. My Kuerig will be fully filled with water. I'm thinking it'll be a night to try many different flavors back to back to back to back to back to back. After drinking all that coffee... I'll probably go to the bathroom obviously and then break out the LSD I've been saving since 1967. It's Ok... It came with the Jimi Hendrix "Are you Experienced" Album that I bought. It's going to be Phil Hughes vs King Felix. Get ready for it... I know I will be. Here are some things to think about: It's a late one tonight as we open up a series with the Seattle Mariners. My Kuerig will be fully filled with water. I'm thinking it'll be a night to try many different flavors back to back to back to back to back to back. After drinking all that coffee... I'll probably go to the bathroom obviously and then break out the LSD I've been saving since 1967. It's Ok... It came with the Jimi Hendrix "Are you Experienced" Album that I bought. It's going to be Phil Hughes vs King Felix. Get ready for it... I know I will be. Here are some things to think about: 1. The Mariners -- The Seattle Mariners are not in first place. They are loaded and not in first place... Nelson Cruz may have hit 77 homes in the first 15 games but they are not in first place. The Mariners are in 4th place with a 6-9 record. And that looks just like the Twins right now... 6-9 and in 4th place. You all see it now... Terry Ryan isn't so stupid... The Twins can do exactly what the Mariners are doing but we paid less for our "Robinson" 2. Seattle -- Seattle is rather large city nestled between Puget Sound and Lake Washington. This unique location between two bodies of water severely limits options when it comes to escaping hoards of zombies. In that scenario... residents can only flee to the North or the South. If the Zombies come from the North and South and they will because of those two bodies of water... It's going to be a problem. Seattle is also known for collecting nicknames. It is known as the "Jet City" "Queen City" "Emerald City" "The Gateway to Alaska" "The City of Flowers" "The City of Goodwill" along with "The City of Caffeine Freaks who wear flannel shirts who don't wash their hair and play a certain style of Rock Music". Queensryche is from Seattle and they wrote a song called "Jet City Woman" which basically means Woman from Seattle. Whoever they wrote the song about must have been flattered to be narrowed down to the half the population of Seattle. Gateway to Alaska is also an interesting nickname. But it's a little unfair because I don't believe any city in Alaska is known as the Gateway to Seattle. When visiting Seattle... The Space Needle is one of the top attractions. It's called the Space Needle because it came from Space. Martians didn't want it anymore because it is poorly shaped for practical needle uses. The large portion at the very top was leaving holes too big. 3. West Coast Night Games -- Here we go again... Another 9:10 Start... Oh Sure... Pacific Time Zoners like Glunn, Ash and Chief (and we can all agree that they are ZONED OUT) are all happy with the start time but that matters little to me. I only care about myself and a 9:10 start means that I will most likely doze off at some point during the game... I maybe even drool on shirt... My wife may even walk in the living room and Shut the TV off only to have me wake up and say... I was watching that. Besides West Coast Night Games... Here are some other things that make people doze off: Long Meetings with lots of charts and graphs on a projector. Church (Unless there is some Snake charming or Speaking in Tongues) then you kinda gotta pay attention. Seminars on the history of the Nickel or the Bay City Rollers. Watching the Yellow Line on the Highway when the wife turns the radio off to talk about the pro's and con's of different color bathroom towels. Being Anesthetized Having a conversation with an Anesthesiologist as they describe what they do for a living. and reading an entire game thread set-up authored by Riverbrian. 4. Felix Hernandez -- He's a pretty good pitcher and he's on the bump tonight. 29 years old and he comes from a land far away called Venezuela. Frodo had to travel through Venezuela to get to Mount Doom. I'm kinda confused about the nickname King Felix. To my knowledge... Venezuela is a Presidential Republic. It is not a Monarchy. Maybe he is just collecting nicknames like the city of Seattle. Maybe Queensryche can write a song about him... "Jet City Pitcher"... that should make him feel special. 5. Wild Turkeys -- I was driving through the Northwestern Minnesota country side Last night. I'm in the middle of nowhere... We are talking Farms and Fields as far as the eye can see. I'm not a hunter or even what you would call outdoorsy. I've never seen a Wild Turkey before... until last night. Driving along... I see this extremely odd looking bird cross the road right in front of me. I had to slow the car down and stop to let it cross. I didn't wonder why it was crossing the road at all... But at that moment... I did wonder why we always question the motives of chickens crossing the road. View full article

If Bark can do that? And He probably can... I think all of us would send Bark our heads

Ok... Welcome to the dog house... James and I are playing Gin... But we can change to some other three handed game.

You are to good a guy to have bad days. Can I type "Something Funny" to make you feel better?

If it was... It was a brilliant Audible

ROTFLMAO GOD is that funny!!!

GLORM!!! How's life treating you my friend? Now You Type "Like I've been sleeping with it's wife".

Yeah I agree... Hosken will probably be the post of the night... But I still hold out hope for the Siamese Cat Bob Newhart photo thing a whatever.

Well... That was out of context