Sean Doolittle of the Oakland A's did a guest piece for ESPN and made up some Sabermetric stats for Oakland, including in his list were BDP (Beard Dependent pitching), WPA/3+C (win probablitly added with three plus catchers in the lineup) and frFSR (right field fan scouting report) along with others, You can check the article for the full list.

What sort of tongue in cheek stats would the Twins have?

LAR (Legs above replacement) If you have bi-lateral leg weakness, that's an automatic -2.0 on the LAR scale.

HAH+ (Heart and Hustle plus) Adjusted to 100 for league average, above is better, below is worse. Gardy uses this stat to make his lineup. No heart, no hustle, no playing time.

2BB2 (Play second, bat second) The number one stat used to determine lineup construction on a day in, day out basis.

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