Bring back the trees, hope St Peter doesn't notice. Cut concession prices in half, hope St Peter doesn't notice. Trade for Cole Hamels, hope spinowner doesn't notice. Trade for Troy Tulowitzki, hope spinowner doesn't notice. Start making moves in an attempt to fix the pen, starting with Oliveros, then dipping into AA, don't care which names, just give me someone who can break a pane of glass with his fastball, hope Mikewantswins notices.