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Exciting, no?

I wouldn't blame ya if ya hated me... I set you up.

In the immortal words of Ash, "Good, Bad, I'm the guy with the gun."

That's right. They're playin' someone like Alabama, right? As immortalized in song by those lyrics "We'll try to stay serene and calm when Alabama gets the bomb."

I can still try, can't i? Though i do concede that perhaps discretion is the better part of valor...

naughty naughty after 3. CBU.

Let me know when it's 10 feet away. I'll try and catch it.

Now it's the bottom of the third. Funny that.

I make it a practice to always mote correctly the first time... And it looks like BYU won. Alright, now i'm on the job.

I made the mistake of leaving a football game on that isn't over before the baseball game starts. Lemme know what i miss.

How's that also line up with his home/away splits? I'm under the impression he's done better on the road? Has Suzuki caught all his home games?

No No ir... It was a hot and humid Houston as i sauntered into my Private investigator's office. Business was slow, and i was even slower. Hadn't been any decent action in who knows how long. And i had gotten used to it, in a slovenly sort of way. I stumbled to the door, pulled it open, and got the shock of my life! There in my office was a sight to behold! But alas, it wouldn't do to discuss my clients... Suffice it to say, someone got away with a crime yesterday, at trope i canna field i mean minute man maid field. maid... man... that could even be the problem. On the outside, it looked like your average, even expected baseball game last night. A home team won going away, 8-0. But i'll have to dig deeper. There are play off implications. The whole country could be watching. There's another game tonight. This time we'll catch the miscreants. I'm staking out Minute Maid Park, where, under the guise of an innocent national pastime, a most hanous crime might be recommitted. But this might blow up in my face, so i'm not going alone. I'm calling all my favors in... Every one of you's got my back, right? Here's the files on the usual suspects: (Please add anything relevant to these files, as "Knowing is half the battle" -GI Joe) Twins 0. Ervin Santana {R} -- Done time for PEDs 1. Aaron Hicks {S} RF -- Fresh of the DL 2. Brian Dozier {R} 2B -- Demolishes fastballs of the high variety 3. Joe Mauer {L} 1B -- The Face 4. Miguel Sano {R} DH -- The Bat 5. Trevor Plouffe {R} 3B -- The Plouffe 6. Eddie Rosario {L} LF -- The canonical cannon 7. Eduardo Escobar {S} SS -- The spark plug 8. Kurt Suzuki {R} C -- Iron Man 9. Byron Buxton {R} CF -- The Kid Astros 0. Lance McCullers {R} 1. George Springer {R} RF -- No relation to Jerry? 2. Jose Altuve {R} 2B -- Little Batting champ? 3. Carlos Correa {R} SS -- 1 upped the Kid in the Draft? 4. Evan Gattis {R} DH 5. Jed Lowrie {S} 3B 6. Carlos Gomez {R} CF -- The X factor 7. Marwin Gonzalez {S} 1B 8. Preston Tucker {L} LF 9. Hank Conger {S} C -- The center of last night's intrigue... Gametime Forecast: 85°F • Mostly Cloudy • 2% PoP I know better than to let the cat out of the bag. Just be ready for anything!

Good to know i wasn't alone... I too was multitasking, in the parlance of our times.

Finishin' my coffee... (well, Mountain Dew, but that's not the line from the movie)

Oh my... Is anyone else still watching?

Er, premature. It was a pitching change, not the end of the inning. Come on Joe (and those who follow) prove me wrong!

BCBU (belated CBU) Astros of Houston are leading the Twins of Minnesota seven runs to no runs going into the bottom the 8th.

But he's pushing it already. That's how fast he is.

My bad. Shoulda held my breath like everyone else.

Pelfrey with 2 bases loaded Ks. One more out to get, and now we ain't picky...

If the twins pull a fly out triple play, does the outfielder get two assists with one throw?

Perhaps. On the other hand, wasabi up the nose sounds like a self correcting problem.

Oh, sorry. I didn't answer the question like i meant to... I refer you to the scene in total recall (er the original, if there was a remake)

So... Up the nostrils as opposed to reading a funny gameday post in the midst of eating (and laughing too hard)

Concur. I do kinda wish it hadn't been that close, but i also wish someone had brought him in.