My favorite "Riverbrianism" was from a couple of years ago. It was too long so I don't think many people read it... But I liked it and that's all that counts. I myself once traded my car for an actual polar bear. I did research and a polar bear was 100,000 dollars in value at the time. My car had 100,000 miles. It was a no brainer. The truck shows up and drops the bear off at my house. The neighbors started complaining immediately. I had to build an enclosure because it turns out it was pretty strong and the rope and stake that worked for my dog wasn't getting it done. You would be surprised at the cost of seal meat and how much they eat and how much there was to clean up after, and worst of all, The bear didn't like to be hugged at all and those claws are real. I tried to give it a hug and it sliced me pretty good and I had to walk to the emergency room bleeding terribly because I had traded my car.