Riverbrian

It’s a 4-game series over 3 days in Kansas City this weekend. If all 4 games are played, the Twins will reach the 81 game mark for the year at the conclusion of Sunday’s game and that is the midway point. Being in the middle isn’t always a good thing. Being in the middle of a project means you are not done yet, in the middle of the night means more sleeping needs to be done… or more partying if you are Vanimal. Being in the middle of a tornado is usually a bad place to be, you don’t want to get in the middle of a mama bear and her cub. Jan Brady didn’t handle being the middle child very well and middle management means that you are going to wake up, go to work and get hit from both sides until you put up those funny desk signs that are actually true statements disguised as humor so you can get away with it. Yep… 81 games is the equivalent of lunch time Wednesday during the work week. You are smack dab in the middle of it and you got to keep at it and try not to kill anyone accidentally… or… on purpose. Here are some things to think about: It’s a 4-game series over 3 days in Kansas City this weekend. If all 4 games are played, the Twins will reach the 81 game mark for the year at the conclusion of Sunday’s game and that is the midway point. Being in the middle isn’t always a good thing. Being in the middle of a project means you are not done yet, in the middle of the night means more sleeping needs to be done… or more partying if you are Vanimal. Being in the middle of a tornado is usually a bad place to be, you don’t want to get in the middle of a mama bear and her cub. Jan Brady didn’t handle being the middle child very well and middle management means that you are going to wake up, go to work and get hit from both sides until you put up those funny desk signs that are actually true statements disguised as humor so you can get away with it. Yep… 81 games is the equivalent of lunch time Wednesday during the work week. You are smack dab in the middle of it and you got to keep at it and try not to kill anyone accidentally… or… on purpose. Here are some things to think about: 1. Ames, Iowa – If you are going to road trip from Minneapolis to Kansas City, Ames Iowa is basically the midway point. Ames Iowa is also pretty close to the middle of nowhere. Unless, you feel that corn fields and hog farms are somewhere and if that’s the case… you are in the middle of somewhere. Ames is the home of Iowa State University… they call themselves the Cyclones because cyclones rotate around the middle of a deep low pressure system and in Ames, you experience deep emotional lows and the pressure to live somewhere else is intense. Ames is also almost exactly in the middle of Iowa and this causes people from Ames to give up trying to escape Iowa because it seems like a never-ending task no matter what direction you flee. 2. Our Twins – The Twins were 12-11 in April, 14-12 in May and they are currently 14-14 in June with one final game to go in June. If the Twins win tonight, it will be the third straight winning month of baseball. If the Twins lose tonight, our fans will start watching bowling instead. Only Ervin Santana can save us from buying Pete Weber T-Shirts. 3. The Royals – When it comes to June performance in the AL Central, the best team this month has been the Kansas City Royals with a 16-9 record. As a matter of fact, the Royals have the best record in the American League for the month of June. Something clicked because they had the worst record in the American League in April. My guess is that somebody reminded all those soon to be free agents on the roster that they were soon to be free agents and they may want to kick it up a notch. 4. Today’s Joe M Conversation: Mauer: Here comes Joe with the Food! Montana: Thank God… I’m starving! McCarthy: Hey, Joe… what did you bring this morning? Maddon: Real simple today guys… peanut butter on toast. Mauer: I love peanut butter on toast… did you bring any honey? Maddon: I did… here ya go. Mauer: Why does honey come in a bear bottle? Montana: It should come in a bee bottle. Maddon: Well… bears like honey… so… it works. McCarthy: Yeah, but the bees make the honey… what would bears be without bees? Mauer: Ears? 5. Driver’s License – When I took the picture for my driver’s license photo… they asked me to smile, and so I did. I got pulled over for speeding… the officer asked for my license… I wasn’t happy about it so I wasn’t smiling at the time and the officer thought it was a fake. Next time I take a photo for my license… I’m going to have Chief stand in for me and that should take care of the problem. View full article

Just let the team decide what to do and support them in whatever direction they travel. If they go into a tailspin and fall out of the race. Support the team by acquiring some future assets that will help in the coming years. If they remain in the hunt and keep defying all logic and prognostications... Support them by letting them continue doing what they are doing. They don't have to sell the farm to support them... leaving them alone to continue doing what they are doing is support as well. I hope they let the team decide what they do in July.

Everyone hold your cards. We will check if this a good one. Next Game is Blackout. 55 numbers or less.

I forgot about Busenitz. We are the Filler B's.

Hey I just realized that we have Belisle, Breslow and Boshers in the Bullpen. We got our own killer B's.

Yeah FSN is spending a lot of time looking back at the Polanco Bunt Attempt. I'd rather they played those two strike calls against Vargas in a loop.

I just looked up Heath Hembree to figure out where he was from and it says "Pleistocene Epoch".

Baseball Commissioner: Hey Derek... This is a courtesy call letting you know that the vote passed and starting next season the strike zone will be automated. Derek: NOOOO!!! You can do that!!! Baseball Commissioner: I'm not sure why you are concerned about It. Every pitch will be called correctly from here on out. We have the technology... this will be good for baseball. Derek: Hey... I just spent 24 million on a pitch framer. You can't do this now. Wait a couple of years if you don't mind.

Not me Vargas can drive one at any moment.

Alright... I have officially changed my mind. Automate that strike zone.

When I think of Tuba... I think of clumsy cartoon bear walking.

http://www.gifimagesdownload.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/top-head-exploding-gif.gif

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgpiOU94kKo Since I know that this girl exists and since I know that she can do this stuff. There is no excuse for Blair Walsh.

Kicker making at least 6 figures who can't consistently make a FG under 45 yards.

And Pants

I wouldn't unless that Sport Almanac in Biff's pocket suggested that I should. Otherwise... I'll stay with Berrios and all that service time he has left.

Yes it does. But after all these years... I've decided that "Ish" is anything liquid like. If I'm wrong... It doesn't matter because I'm going with that so I don't end up diving back into that pool.

GIMENEZ

Post of the night thus far

When we went to Boston we stayed here. http://www.nantasketbeachresort.com/ It's on the Ocean and very affordable and a decent hotel to boot. We took a Ferry Across the Harbor and walked through the city of Boston to get to Fenway. I'd do that again... If I do Boston again... Which I probably won't.

One of the great thinkers of our time… Eddie Vedder once said: “The best revenge is to live on and prove yourself”. Take that Cleveland! Jeremy spoke in class this weekend and he said “We’re Still Alive”. I wish we had someone on the team named Jeremy because this section would have tied together better that way. Now it’s four games in Boston at Fenway Park. The Twins are Smokin’ and Feelin’ Satisfied. It’s More Than a Feeling to have this kind of Peace of Mind… So… Don’t Look Back. Here are some things to think about: One of the great thinkers of our time… Eddie Vedder once said: “The best revenge is to live on and prove yourself”. Take that Cleveland! Jeremy spoke in class this weekend and he said “We’re Still Alive”. I wish we had someone on the team named Jeremy because this section would have tied together better that way. Now it’s four games in Boston at Fenway Park. The Twins are Smokin’ and Feelin’ Satisfied. It’s More Than a Feeling to have this kind of Peace of Mind… So… Don’t Look Back. Here are some things to think about: 1. Boston – I’ve been to Boston once in my life and it was a nice visit but once was enough. I remember losing my pants in the hotel room. I swore I brought some Khakis but I couldn’t find them in my luggage and I was looking around the hotel room when the maid came in and asked what I was looking for. I told her that I couldn’t find my Khakis and she held up my car keys and said “they are right here”. I said “Thanks” and went for a drive around Boston without pants. 2. Our Twins – Just like that… we are back in first place. The experts don’t know what to say. They keep saying the same thing over and over. They still expect the Indians to eventually run away with the Central and they still don’t believe in the Twins. The Twins obviously can’t read. 3. The Red Sox – Things have been below average for the Red Sox this past week. They lost 2 out of 3 to the Angels over the weekend and they lost 2 out of 3 to the Royals before that. Expectations were high for the Red Sox and they are sitting tied for 1st place but it’s not like the starting pitching has held up. Chris Sale is the only starter that is punching teams out on a regular basis and that’s who we get to face tonight. 4. Today’s Joe M Conversation: Mauer: Hey, Joe… can you look this over and see if it looks alright. McCarthy: What is it? Mauer: It’s a letter to Twins payroll department. I’m asking for all 23 million in one big check. Maddon: Why? Mauer: I’m tired of running to the bank every time I get a smaller check like this one. Montana: Smaller check? That check is 1.6 million. Mauer: I’d rather do it all in one trip. McCarthy: You spelled receive wrong. Mauer: I can never spell that word right. I’m bad at spelling. Maddon: Use mnemonic devices… they help with spelling. Montana: I before E except after C… that's a mnemonic device. Mauer: Receive… I before E except after C… hey, that works… is it always like that? Maddon: Yep Mauer: That’s weird. McCarthy: With mnemonics I can spell any word. Mauer: How do you spell mnemonic? McCarthy: I don’t know. 5. Invisible Ink – I bought an invisible ink pen about 20 years ago. I think it’s still working but I can’t be sure. _____________________ Lineups: TWINS Brian Dozier 2B Eduardo Escobar DH Miguel Sano 3B Robbie Grossman RF Kennys Vargas 1B Jorge Polanco SS Chris Gimenez C Eddie Rosario LF Byron Buxton CF Jose Berrios P RED SOX Mookie Betts RF Dustin Pedroia 2B Xander Bogaerts SS Mitch Moreland 1B Andrew Benintendi LF Chris Young DH Jackie Bradley CF Sandy Leon C Tzu-Wei Lin 3B Chris Sale P Weather: sunny to partly cloudy, 76 deg F, no rain, winds up to 14mph from the WSW Play ball! View full article

Cross away... As long as I don't end up crossing my arms in disgust after.