Riverbrian

This isn't meant to be a slam on Plouffe because I was proud of how Plouffe progressed into a fairly dependable defensive 3B. There was a time when he clearly wasn't. But... It was hard watching Plouffe be dependable while Watching Arenado, Machado and Lawrie be absolutely amazing at the position. They are simply setting a new standard of what 3b are now capable of doing.

Castro has done that opposite way down the line thing a few times now.

If I had to pick a favorite player not wearing a Twins uniform. Nolen Arenado would be it. He is the best defensive 3B the game has ever produced and he can hit a little to. He is worth the price of admission. Must See TV

I thought the Salmon People attending the attending the tractor pull was more questionable.

I don't know what everybody thinks of the Joe M Conversation... I understand that it is random and weird but I will stand here and tell you this in all sincerity. It makes me laugh. It has become my favorite part of the Intro.

Bashing? I typed that with love in my heart. It felt like indigestion... but i'm sure it was love in my heart.

It is interleague action at Target Field as the Rockies come to town. It's a battle between two first-place teams that were not supposed to be in first place in the first place. Surprised… yes… but we shouldn’t be. After all this time we shouldn’t be surprised by anything in this game of baseball... or in life. If you are surprised following baseball… you have closed your mind to all the possibilities that have been displayed to us over decades of observation. We have enough data now… it should be harder and harder to surprise anyone these days. I tried to surprise my wife on Sunday for Mother’s day. It was an impossible task… she knew it was Mother’s day and she knew she was a Mother. Here are some things to think about: 1. Little Falls – Right in the middle of the state sits a town of 8,000 plus called Little Falls. Little Falls was voted, interestingly, as the most boring town in Minnesota. The 2nd most boring town in Minnesota is Chuckville located up in the boundary waters area. Chuckville has a population of 2, both residents are named Chuck and both are mimes. The Mississippi River travels through the town and it travels out of town just as quickly as it came. Little Falls is the boyhood home of Charles Lindbergh. Charles was the first person to fly across the Atlantic Ocean and he did so in a desperate attempt to escape Little Falls. If you are looking for something to do in Little Falls… good luck with that. Little Falls has always known that it lacks activities so it tried real hard to create something. After months of closed-room brainstorming they came up with the Greater Minnesota Two-Cylinder Club Annual Field Days, which instantly became the longest named event in world history. Every year many people swim upstream, jumping over the falls to attend this annual event. They watch an Antique Tractor Pull, check out the flea market and then they turn a bright red, fertilize their eggs and die. More people would attend this event if they were not eaten by bears along the way. 2. Our Twins – After winning the weekend series with the Indians in Cleveland, the Twins sit alone in first place in the AL Central. The Twins currently have a home run streak of 15 straight games and that is just 1 game away from the team record of 16 straight games set in 1979. If the Twins can hit home runs in the next two games… they will beat the record and Roy Smalley will be completely removed from all record books. 3. The Rockies – This team from Colorado can hit, they can play a little defense and this year… they have added some pitching to that mix. They have a difficult bullpen to navigate with Ottovino, Dunn and McGee setting up Greg Holland as the closer. It’s a good combination because the bats can get them a lead and the pen can hold it. The Twins should probably try to strike early… I’m not always certain that is what they are trying to do in some of the games I watch. 4. Today’s Joe M Conversation Montana: Hey Joe… Are you going to bring that picture back to me? McCarthy: The picture back to you… Mauer: What picture? Montana: The original photo of “The Catch”. I loaned it to McCarthy last week for his photo exhibit. Maddon: The Sports Illustrated Photo? You have the original? Montana: Yes I do… Dwight Clark leaping high in the air in the final seconds to beat the Cowboys in 1982. Mauer: I was born in 1983… that’s probably why I don’t remember it. Maddon: How did that photo exhibition go? Did a lot of people attend? McCarthy: Yeah… the place was packed… the photo was a big draw… everything went great until the building burned down and everything was destroyed including all the photos. Montana: Destroyed? It was destroyed? Do you have any idea what that picture was worth? McCarthy: A thousand words? 5. Chess Set - I have a very unique chess set. I bought each piece one at a time and each of the 32 pieces comes from a different chess set. Not one chess piece is the same style. I bought them all at the Pawn Shop. ____________________ Lineups: ROCKIES Charlie Blackmon CF DJ LeMahieu 2B Nolan Arenado 3B Mark Reynolds DH Carlos Gonzalez RF Ian Desmond 1B Gerardo Parra LF Pat Valaika SS Tony Wolters C Kyle Freeland P TWINS Brian Dozier 2B Robbie Grossman RF Miguel Sano 3B Kennys Vargas 1B Eduardo Escobar DH Jorge Polanco SS Jason Castro C Byron Buxton CF Eddie Rosario LF Phil Hughes P Weather: Mostly cloudy, 80 deg, wind at 11mph from the SW, but dying down; should get the game in before the rains come, but tomorrow could be a different story. Click here to view the article

I'm excited to watch him throw tomorrow. I'm hoping that he looks like we all want him to look. I'd like some excitement over his performance.

I look at it this way. She's one of us and therefore I feel pride in her accomplishments. She's not like that Ron Coomer fella who was one of us and then left us for the Cubs.

She's on NHL/MLB Network now. I see her every weekend on quick pitch. Good for her... making nice strides in her career.

SANO He makes it look easy

Yes But I have my own internet.

In 1919 the population of Fergus Falls was around 7,000. Back in those times towns would grow significantly when the railroad came to town. During the 1920 census shortly after the Otter Tail Valley Railroad was established through Fergus Falls. The Population exploded to 1.8 Million as a result of the railroad. A census taker named Bob came to town on a train and he got stuck in a loop executing the door to door census and he counted the same ten households over 60 thousand times. There were 60,014 people named Vern Wright in Fergus Falls according to the Fergus Falls census figures. By the time the 1930's census was completed... Almost all of the superfluous fictional people had left and the town population plummeted to 9,000.

The Twins open up a 3-game series against the Indians. Here we are… mid-May… tied for 1st place with the Indians. This series is a head to head battle for the AL Central lead. How is this possible? We are working with a 4-man rotation (closer to a 3-man, actually) and a bullpen that has been lit up like Foster Brooks, and last night Polanco was our clean-up hitter. This might be one of those seasons where the Twins contend and the Twins Daily faithful hate the moves made to keep them contending. This might be one of those seasons of satisfactory results from unsatisfactory methods. Maybe the means won’t justify the ends. Maybe it will be like winning a race across town and using the sewer as a shortcut. If you win a race that way… nobody will want to hug you afterwards. Here are some things to think about: 1. Cleveland – Cleveland tries to claim to be the birthplace of Rock and Roll but we all know that Pat Boone was the originator and he was born in Jacksonville, Florida. Cleveland had Aaron Boone and currently has Boone Logan so now Cleveland is building the Boone Hall of Fame with a big Daniel Boone statue in front of the main doors. Cleveland has built itself up on the backs of others throughout its history. It’s a little known fact that Cleveland originally became a major city because of Minnesota. As a major shipping port on the Great Lakes, Cleveland was the destination for Iron Ore out of the Iron Range and this started the growth spurt. Cleveland was the 5th largest city in America in the 1920’s… behind New York City, Chicago, Fergus Falls and Philadelphia. When it comes to Iron Ore… apparently it takes more people to receive Iron Ore than it does to ship it. While Cleveland grew to major city status on the back of the Iron Ore trade, it should be pointed out that Hibbing does not have a professional sports team. Yes… Cleveland has stolen almost everything from everyone else but they have produced a couple of things that we all enjoy… Smuckers Jelly and Progressive Insurance. Cleveland may lack a certain flow but Cleveland… ironically… brought us Flo. 2. Our Twins – Minnesota is currently 10th in the American League in Runs Scored and 12th in the American League in ERA. If you look at those numbers… of course we are in 1st place… where else would we be? 3. The Indians – All everyone talked about was that Cleveland rotation going into 2017. Who could match that rotation? Boston adds Sale, Price and Porcello and people say it’s almost as good as the Indians. Fast forward to mid-May and the Indians starters have combined for a 4.85 ERA and that is last in the American League… but of course they are in 1st place… where else would they be? 4. Today’s Joe M Conversation Maddon: Would you call these skies partly sunny or partly cloudy? Montana: Good question… Where does partly cloudy end and partly sunny begin? McCarthy: I wonder if it’s in the dictionary… does anybody have one? Maddon: I do… I keep one in my back pocket at all times Mauer: What’s a dictionary? Montana: You don’t know what a dictionary is? Mauer: I never went to college McCarthy: It’s a… well… how do I explain this? It’s a book… it has every word in it. Mauer: Every word? McCarthy: It’s tough to explain. Maddon: Guys, I have one right here. Montana: Grab your phone… look it Up. Maddon: Guys Mauer: I’m not getting any reception Montana: Yeah me neither Maddon: Guys, what are you doing? Montana: Hold your phone in the air… see if that helps. Mauer: It’s not helping. McCarthy: Maybe there is a dictionary pamphlet somewhere or something? Maddon: I'M LOOKING UNDER D 5.Quicksand – You don’t hear about quicksand anymore. In the 60’s and 70’s we had people dramatically sinking in quicksand in lots of movies and TV shows. These days nobody seems to sink in quicksand anymore. I wouldn’t even know where to find quicksand. The closest thing I have to quicksand is the bean bag chair in the basement and I have one hell of a time getting out of that so I get the concept. ____________________ Lineups: TWINS Brian Dozier 2B Joe Mauer 1B Miguel Sano 3B Max Kepler RF Kennys Vargas DH Eddie Rosario LF Jorge Polanco SS Jason Castro C Byron Buxton CF Ervin Santana P INDIANS Carlos Santana 1B Francisco Lindor SS Michael Brantley LF Edwin Encarnacion DH Jason Kipnis 2B Jose Ramirez 3B Lonnie Chisenhall CF Yan Gomes C Brandon Guyer RF Josh Tomlin P Weather: meh ... mid-50s, cloudy, 10mph breeze from the NNE. Click here to view the article

Not really sure who he is... I had to look him up on Wilkapedia.

Berrios is a beautiful new gas station with a grand opening scheduled for June 29. Duffey... You nailed it.

The Twins started spring training with 8 sensible defensible SP options: Santana Santiago Gibson Hughes May Mejia Berrios Duffey May is out with injury Duffey was moved to the pen Gibson and Mejia have been tried and sent down. This starting pitching tank is on "E" and there isn't a gas station to be found. Wilk... That's our front office walking around with a gas can... looking for drips of fuel... in the couch cushions.

A late contender for post of the night

On second thought... You should have expressed it this way: Mrs. Chief: So he could make a clean getaway Chief: Mmffmmffmf

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