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A horse walks into a bar- n.

And Houston has one before Minnesota? Inconceivable!

An out! Hooray for Hunter! He had that.

8-3... How can that be? I miss Duffey...

Hicks... 2 more to go at least.

Well, that was something... Um. CBU Houston 5, Minnesota 2 After 7 innings. And Mr. May is learning the hard way to come into the middle of an inning?

CBU after 6 is 2-0 Minnesota.

My first experience with Maine lobsters was to take so long managing to get shells off, that it was cold and rubbery. But once that manual dexterity is mastered, it's good stuff. I'm always blown away how good butter tastes with seafood...

I stand corrected. I guess i've just eaten wings as snacks late at night in lieu of a full meal, and probably from an establishment making their money on the beverage to drowned the ultra spicy flavor... My thoughts should be put in the same place as "popcorn does not a meal make" advice. "Just speculatin' upon a hypothesis. You know i don't know nuthin'."

Yeah, kinda like it. It's why it's a snack food, and spiced up the wazoo for the spice's taste, rather than to compliment its substance. And that's why eating 15 of 'em is no big deal.

It isn't dead, but wings don't always live up to their hype. Especially hyper hype. Escobar makes it 2-0. And these festivals are large numbers, making the individual attention that makes food best a bit difficult.

End of 4, it's a tieless score by Dozier and the Twins up 1-0. CBU

I like double plays... At least that one.

I came across this picture in the Buffalo area apparently. If you was still in the area, i'da asked what it looked like live. Oh well.

Dozier doin' it.

CBU: Second verse, same as the first. Little bit louder... Er, i mean scoreless tie. It's quite formal and unscratched.

CBU: Scoreless tie continues into the second inning.

Now Duffey mounts the mound...

What, me worry? BTW, they say it's Star Wars day at Minute Maid. Chief, are you thematically garbed? If not, how would ya be if you were?

And a very tactful shutout at that.

(Submitted To the Guild of Twinsdaily Game Thread Intro Writers for approval as Master Writer of Game Thread Intros with all the rights and privileges pertaining there to. And the silly hat. Must have one.) 0. "We the Posters of the Twins Daily, in Order to enjoy a more perfect Game, establish Camaraderie, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common entertainment, promote the general Knowledge of Baseball, and secure the Pursuit of Happiness to ourselves and our Posts - eary, earier, or otherwise, do ordain and establish this Thread for the Game pitting the Twins of Minnesota against the Host, the Astros of Houston, this September 6th, in the year of Buxton/Sano 1" 1. Tyler Duffey, locate thy fastball such that Astro's batters don't. At least not precisely. Also thy curve ball, as per Suzuki's calls and set ups. 2. Figure this here Dallas (in Houston?) Keuchel out as a team. Doesn't help so much when one person goes 3 for 3 with 3 triples if no one else can get him in. Whereas 6 consecutive outless at bats goes a long ways towards winning the game, no matter how weak. 3. Get to the ball. Catch it. Throw it as per established force and cut off practices. Repeat. All are important, and how last night's game ended is a good indicator of how important it is. Ah, fielding... 4. So... i guess it all boils down to: "Play ball!" Wait a minute. Surely the Twins aren't reading this... Why am i addressing it to them? Besides, i bet they've heard it, and better said, from people who know more than me. I guess it's a convenient literary device? Yeah, i suppose that's all it is. 5. Game Threads. This is one. Game Thread, meet Twins Daily Posters. Posters, meet Game Thread. Now that you've been introduced, you can talk all ya want! Anyway the playahs: Twins 0. Tyler Duffey {R} P 1. Aaron Hicks {S} LF 2. Brian Dozier {R} 2B 3. Joe Mauer {L} 1B 4. Miguel Sano {R} DH 5. Trevor Plouffe {R} 3B 6. Torii Hunter {R} RF 7. Eduardo Escobar {S} SS 8. Kurt Suzuki {R} C 9. Byron Buxton {R} CF Astros 0. Dallas Keuchel {L} P 1. Jose Altuve {R} 2B 2. Jed Lowrie {S} 3B 3. Carlos Correa {R} SS 4. Evan Gattis {R} DH 5. Colby Rasmus {L} RF 6. Carlos Gomez {R} CF 7. Marwin Gonzalez {S} LF 8. Luis Valbuena {L} 1B 9. Hank Conger {S} C Gametime Forecast: 89°F - Mostly Cloudy - 12% PoP (Outside) Brought to you in 9 acts, with a possible extemporaneous sequel following immediately without intermission. Oh well. I guess it isn't so bad being an apprentice...

I'm sure RiverBrian's got your back. He'll eat wings for us all. And we'll find out about the blue cheese once and for all (did it take the high road or the low, to say nothing about Scotland) Anyway, thanks for the company!

I know. Just givin' ya hard time, i guess. Sorry about that.

I don't think you're allowed to pinch hit for the other team... But that would be a brilliant strategy if we could pull it off.

Concur.