Bark's Lounge

Tremendous!

That makes a lot of sense. I feel bad for Klaus, but he needs to keep his anger in check - hopefully the umbrella shields him from the alimony suit that will be brought his way. I wish I would have run into you - it would have made the party a more positive experience for me - but what the heck - maybe next year.

Tonight I went to a MLB Draft Party. I never thought I would see that happen. I guess the times they are a changin’. I get to the party that is being hosted by a close friend, who I will call Lonny Frizzwhistle, and I enter his residence and see a mix of people that doesn’t make sense. When I am at my optimal sense of being, maybe I could have envisioned this sorted group of characters, right now, I am in a human slump, and in all reality, I was not mentally up to dealing with what I had to deal with tonight. The group who had gathered this evening was a mix between pencil pushing baseball fanatics, football adrenaline junkies, some stoners. Methamphetamine addicts, and just some people who wanted to drink out of a free keg and Whop. I fall into this last category. When the first pick was announced (Mark Appel), most were surprised and I am not too sure if anyone at this party thought that would be the outcome. No one seemed bummed out – and why should they? It’s not like the Twins would have selected him if they had the opportunity and it really did not change the draft scenario for the Twins. The second pick was Bryant. At this point I think the baseball guys were hoping that Gray would fall to us, but no matter what the MLB analysts said, I knew the Rockies would pick Gray. It was very clearly expressed by these analyst that they were looking for a position player to use the third pick on, but I think it was Gray or bust and they went with the BPA… hence Gray. The Twins took Kohl Stewart. I was damn happy with this pick and thought the Twins made out well. If the Twins would have picked Moran I would have been okay with that also. My original hopes were of Bryant or Stewart. 1st Round won! After this pick, the environment at the party changed. One of the baseball guys started sobbing, he was upset that the Twins didn’t select Moran. He moaned out to the crowd “The Twin’s always F**k this up. How can they pass on the next Cal Ripken?” One of the football guys who was drunk, got upset by this outburst and hit this individual over the head with the handle of his Umbrella. It knocked the baseball guy straight out. I thought to myself – This cannot be happening… WTF? The police were called, they arrested the football perpetrator and had EMT’s pick up the baseball guy to take him to Regions Hospital to check him out for any head injuries. I hung on a few hours more, milking my adult beverages and keeping tabs on my wife, who was chillaxin with the stoners. Once the Twin’s 2nd round pick was announced, the baseball pencil pushers had a collective movement of anger. My thought was Ryan Eades couldn’t be that bad? Because of the tense environment at this party – Mr. and Mrs. Bark’s Lounge deem it is necessary to leave this party. Once we get home I decide to check Twins Daily to see what the collective thinks about Ryan Eades. What I find is not too uplifting… my jury will be out for a while. My advice is this: settle down you maniacs – the MLB amateur baseball draft is a crapshoot… at best.

Tonight I went to a MLB Draft Party. I never thought I would see that happen. I guess the times they are a changin’. I get to the party that is being hosted by a close friend, who I will call Lonny Frizzwhistle, and I enter his residence and see a mix of people that doesn’t make sense. When I am at my optimal sense of being, maybe I could have envisioned this sorted group of characters, right now, I am in a human slump, and in all reality, I was not mentally up to dealing with what I had to deal with tonight. The group who had gathered this evening was a mix between pencil pushing baseball fanatics, football adrenaline junkies, some stoners. Methamphetamine addicts, and just some people who wanted to drink out of a free keg and Whop. I fall into this last category. When the first pick was announced (Mark Appel), most were surprised and I am not too sure if anyone at this party thought that would be the outcome. No one seemed bummed out – and why should they? It’s not like the Twins would have selected him if they had the opportunity and it really did not change the draft scenario for the Twins. The second pick was Bryant. At this point I think the baseball guys were hoping that Gray would fall to us, but no matter what the MLB analysts said, I knew the Rockies would pick Gray. It was very clearly expressed by these analyst that they were looking for a position player to use the third pick on, but I think it was Gray or bust and they went with the BPA… hence Gray. The Twins took Kohl Stewart. I was damn happy with this pick and thought the Twins made out well. If the Twins would have picked Moran I would have been okay with that also. My original hopes were of Bryant or Stewart. 1st Round won! After this pick, the environment at the party changed. One of the baseball guys started sobbing, he was upset that the Twins didn’t select Moran. He moaned out to the crowd “The Twin’s always F**k this up. How can they pass on the next Cal Ripken?” One of the football guys who was drunk, got upset by this outburst and hit this individual over the head with the handle of his Umbrella. It knocked the baseball guy straight out. I thought to myself – This cannot be happening… WTF? The police were called, they arrested the football perpetrator and had EMT’s pick up the baseball guy to take him to Regions Hospital to check him out for any head injuries. I hung on a few hours more, milking my adult beverages and keeping tabs on my wife, who was chillaxin with the stoners. Once the Twin’s 2nd round pick was announced, the baseball pencil pushers had a collective movement of anger. My thought was Ryan Eades couldn’t be that bad? Because of the tense environment at this party – Mr. and Mrs. Bark’s Lounge deem it is necessary to leave this party. Once we get home I decide to check Twins Daily to see what the collective thinks about Ryan Eades. What I find is not too uplifting… my jury will be out for a while. My advice is this: settle down you maniacs – the MLB amateur baseball draft is a crapshoot… at best.

On this site there is obviously a lot of chatter about firing Ron Gardenhire and Rick Anderson. I do not disagree with those opinions, but I have to stop short of fully supporting them. The Twins are a mess right now and it is quite clear changes need to be made. Maybe changing out some of the starting pitchers will help a little – I cannot see how it would hurt at this junction in time. My greatest disappointment with this club is the absence of an emotional leader, preferably a starting position player, one who has fire in his eyes and can impassion the spirits and desire of low key teammates. Watching Dustin Pedroia in the 2 series we have played against the BoSox has been a religious experience. This guy is fired up and wears his heart on his sleeve. He takes nothing for granted and fights till the very end. When something positive happens for his ballclub he ignites the fire in his eyes and burns holes through his teammates. Dustin Pedroia represents an element that is necessary in a winning baseball club. This is an element that has been missing for a very long time from our Minnesota Twins. Some say that Pedroia plays above his talent. I disagree and believe that Pedroia has a ton of talent and would be an All-Star no matter what his personality or passion dictates. It is his Guts, Glory and Take No Prisoners style of play that makes him great. All-Star often does not equate to greatness. I understand the Twins have a soft spoken Franchise player and a few other guys who can swing the bat a little. I understand that without excellent starting pitching the Twins will not go far. I also understand that without a Field General who will burn your soul with the imprint of Guts and Glory, that glory will never be obtained. Maybe the Twins should look deeper into this draft and take a chance on a player with Pedroia’s intangibles instead of going with the Best Player Available… if that kind of player is out there. In my heart of hearts, I do not feel the Twins will reach the promised land without this kind of player. Maybe Kirby Puckett was a once in a lifetime for this franchise… I hope that is not the case.

On this site there is obviously a lot of chatter about firing Ron Gardenhire and Rick Anderson. I do not disagree with those opinions, but I have to stop short of fully supporting them. The Twins are a mess right now and it is quite clear changes need to be made. Maybe changing out some of the starting pitchers will help a little – I cannot see how it would hurt at this junction in time. My greatest disappointment with this club is the absence of an emotional leader, preferably a starting position player, one who has fire in his eyes and can impassion the spirits and desire of low key teammates. Watching Dustin Pedroia in the 2 series we have played against the BoSox has been a religious experience. This guy is fired up and wears his heart on his sleeve. He takes nothing for granted and fights till the very end. When something positive happens for his ballclub he ignites the fire in his eyes and burns holes through his teammates. Dustin Pedroia represents an element that is necessary in a winning baseball club. This is an element that has been missing for a very long time from our Minnesota Twins. Some say that Pedroia plays above his talent. I disagree and believe that Pedroia has a ton of talent and would be an All-Star no matter what his personality or passion dictates. It is his Guts, Glory and Take No Prisoners style of play that makes him great. All-Star often does not equate to greatness. I understand the Twins have a soft spoken Franchise player and a few other guys who can swing the bat a little. I understand that without excellent starting pitching the Twins will not go far. I also understand that without a Field General who will burn your soul with the imprint of Guts and Glory, that glory will never be obtained. Maybe the Twins should look deeper into this draft and take a chance on a player with Pedroia’s intangibles instead of going with the Best Player Available… if that kind of player is out there. In my heart of hearts, I do not feel the Twins will reach the promised land without this kind of player. Maybe Kirby Puckett was a once in a lifetime for this franchise… I hope that is not the case.

All is good John!

If it is any consolation, Ah-Ha had the best song of the three I mentioned... and their video for "Take On Me" was totally RAD for that period of time.

You know something is going wrong when after watching the hometown boys get walked-off on, Don Henley’s song “Boys of Summer” starts repeating in your head. I am positive that the inner workings of my mental mechanics has short circuited. I am an individual that holds a great amount of disdain for the music of the 1980’s (mainly pop). I believe I was around 10 years old when Mr. Henley’s aforementioned song hit the charts. I remember hearing it and feeling violated, uncomfortable, and ill to my stomach… the same feeling I felt when I first heard Mr. Mister’s “Broken Wing’s” or A-Ha’s “Take on Me”. I pretty much hate everything that has anything to do with the 1980’s and that is not meant to be offensive to anyone else – That’s my wave, no one else has an obligation to surf it. Watching the Twin’s play the last week and a half is having the same nauseous affect of the 1980’s experience on me. Everyone had an inclination that the starting pitching would falter at some point, sooner rather than later, and they officially have claimed that distinction, but it’s the damn offense that has fallen on its face. Except for Mauer and maybe Morneau everything has gone wrong. The offense was suppose to bring some joy to the viewer in a season where joy would be hard to come by. When 5 or more of your starting position players are hitting like pitchers, enjoyment of watching this team will be scarce. Home Runs, Doubles and Triples have become my Heroin… and man, I am fiending for a fix. Dozier! Willingham! Doumit! Hicks! Parmelee! (our best defensive outfielder) Get Your Shiznasty together and help make the 2013 Minnesota Twins an intriguing offense that loses a bunch of high scoring games instead of a team that loses 8-2 every night. In a season of low expectations mainly because of the pitching predicament – we as fans are owed this much. Help me out here. I want to rid my mind of the song “Boys of Summer” and live in peace. P.S. - R.I.P. Ray Manzarek

You know something is going wrong when after watching the hometown boys get walked-off on, Don Henley’s song “Boys of Summer” starts repeating in your head. I am positive that the inner workings of my mental mechanics has short circuited. I am an individual that holds a great amount of disdain for the music of the 1980’s (mainly pop). I believe I was around 10 years old when Mr. Henley’s aforementioned song hit the charts. I remember hearing it and feeling violated, uncomfortable, and ill to my stomach… the same feeling I felt when I first heard Mr. Mister’s “Broken Wing’s” or A-Ha’s “Take on Me”. I pretty much hate everything that has anything to do with the 1980’s and that is not meant to be offensive to anyone else – That’s my wave, no one else has an obligation to surf it. Watching the Twin’s play the last week and a half is having the same nauseous affect of the 1980’s experience on me. Everyone had an inclination that the starting pitching would falter at some point, sooner rather than later, and they officially have claimed that distinction, but it’s the damn offense that has fallen on its face. Except for Mauer and maybe Morneau everything has gone wrong. The offense was suppose to bring some joy to the viewer in a season where joy would be hard to come by. When 5 or more of your starting position players are hitting like pitchers, enjoyment of watching this team will be scarce. Home Runs, Doubles and Triples have become my Heroin… and man, I am fiending for a fix. Dozier! Willingham! Doumit! Hicks! Parmelee! (our best defensive outfielder) Get Your Shiznasty together and help make the 2013 Minnesota Twins an intriguing offense that loses a bunch of high scoring games instead of a team that loses 8-2 every night. In a season of low expectations mainly because of the pitching predicament – we as fans are owed this much. Help me out here. I want to rid my mind of the song “Boys of Summer” and live in peace. P.S. - R.I.P. Ray Manzarek

Hello Twins Daily Participants, It appears fortune is on my side today as I have lined up an interview with my Anger. Some may find that a strange concept, but I very often have problems accessing certain areas of my emotional palette. My anger is a very private entity and he mostly shows up when I least expect it, which in turn has made my adult life an adventure, a mess and somewhat interesting - said adult life also has had a handful of days spent in the local detention center. Just to be clear, most of this interview will be based on Twins baseball. I wouldn’t want to abuse the privilege of using this site for non-Twins related rants.[PRBREAK][/PRBREAK] Before I begin this interview, I feel the need to recognize the passing of Slayer guitarist Jeff Hanneman. Mr. Hanneman - thank you for being a huge contributing force behind the albums “Reign in Blood”, “South of Heaven”, and “Seasons in the Abyss.” Without Slayer, this interview would not be possible. For those three albums, Slayer was the perfect marriage between Metal and Hard Core Punk. Mr. Hanneman – your music will live on forever and you will never be forgotten. Rest in Peace my friend. [B]Bark’s Lounge:[/B] Hello Anger. How have you been doing since the MLB season started? [B]Anger:[/B] Can’t you tell by the holes in your walls? Obviously, I am doing great. I have been enjoying Minnesota’s weekly snow storms. It’s always nice to have a few snow storms in… what month is it? August or something? [B]Bark’s Lounge:[/B] Actually, it’s early May, but I get your point and I have noticed the holes in the wall. Thanks for that. Second question – how about the play of your Minnesota Twin’s through month #1 of the season? [B]Anger:[/B] At this point in the season their record is a lot better than I anticipated, but for the most part they have been a drag to watch. First and foremost they probably should have cancelled the first month of the season because of the god damned snow. Besides the snow-outs, the Twins have been playing like a person with a bi-polar disorder who is not taking his happy pills. For a short stretch they appear to play with a little bit of fire in their bellies, but they follow that up with a stretch of uninteresting and uninspiring baseball that is not worth investing your time into. The s@#&*y thing about that is you never know what team is going to show up. If I hate one thing – it is inconsistency. [B]Bark’s Lounge:[/B] Understood. What do you foresee happening for the Twins as the season progresses into the summer months? [B]Anger:[/B] First of all let’s get through May before we start thinking about the summer. Our season might be over before we get to the “summer”. Right now, the Twin’s offense sucks. Whether one thinks that the pitching has been good or so-so to this point is irrelevant. The fact is that the starting pitching will get worse as the season progresses. The bats need to get going and going soon. There is some talent in our line-up, but so far it has fallen flat on its face. To win 70 games the offense is going to have to fire on all cylinders for good chunks of this season. Right now, it is hard for me to envision that happening. [B]Bark’s Lounge:[/B] Who are a few of the players you have some concerns with? [B]Anger:[/B] Individually, I care not to focus on the pitching. Our bullpen is okay, but that will change once the starters begin to fail with regularity. At that point, when the bullpen is overtaxed, the dominos of negativity will start to fall. Perkins and Burton will probably be okay… and I do think the Pressly kid is a keeper. If Pressly hits a bad stretch, I believe the Twins should stick it out with him and not offer him back to the BoSox. He will help in the future. [B]Bark’s Lounge:[/B] Position Players? [B]Anger:[/B] Florimon should not be in the bigs. Doumit has looked like crap, his play is indicative of a player who has aged 5 years in the off-season. Morneau has been a bit of a bummer. Most people say he is healthy and he is going to re-emerge into the elite offensive force he once was – I hope it happens, but I have some severe concerns that Morneau is on the downslide Big Time. Dozier and Hicks started off badly, especially Hicks. They have looked better recently, but to rely on them would be suicidal to one’s hopes. To be honest the only position players that have been okay are Willingham and Escobar. Willingham is doing what is expected of him and Escobar will get his wings cut off and fall back to earth. Mauer has perplexed me a bit. A week or two ago he was batting .400, now he is batting in the .280’s. Slumps are one thing, but I have to believe something is going haywire with his thought process when he gets up to the plate. Some may think Mauer is mentally weak because of his past injury situations and such, but I am not of that thought. I actually think he is a focused, well-oiled machine when it comes to hitting. He is either physically hurt or mentally distracted. His strikeout rate to this point is simply un-Mauer-like and shocking… something is amiss. Overall, I do not like the line-up. It is not gelling. Who knows, maybe it will… maybe it won’t. Either way, we have no control over it. It is what it is. [B]Bark’s Lounge:[/B] How about…. [B]Anger:[/B] I’m done. I’m tired of this S%@t. [B]Bark’s Lounge:[/B] Okay? [B]Anger:[/B] And by the way Bark. Quit taking your happy pills. I am feeling stifled and boxed in. Let me be free to roam. I am very disappointed that you have kept us in this arctic hell hole. We should have been long gone. [B]Bark’s Lounge:[/B] If I could go back 15 years, we would have been relocated… but I cannot go back and fix it. I did stop taking my happy pills a couple days ago. Does that help? [B]Anger:[/B] A little, I guess. View full article

Hello Twins Daily Participants, It appears fortune is on my side today as I have lined up an interview with my Anger. Some may find that a strange concept, but I very often have problems accessing certain areas of my emotional palette. My anger is a very private entity and mostly, he only shows up when I least expect it, which in turn has made my adult life an adventure, a mess and somewhat interesting - mixed together with a handful of days spent in the local detention center. Just to be clear, most of this interview will be based on Twins baseball. I wouldn’t want to abuse the privilege of using this site for non Twins related rants. Before I begin this interview, I feel the need to recognize the passing of Slayer guitarist Jeff Hanneman. Mr. Hanneman - thank you for being a huge contributing force behind the albums “Reign in Blood”, “South of Heaven”, and “Seasons in the Abyss.” Without Slayer, this interview would not be possible. For those 3 albums, Slayer was the perfect marriage between Metal and Hard Core Punk. Mr. Hanneman – your music will live on forever and you will never be forgotten. Rest in Peace my friend. Bark’s Lounge: Hello Anger. How have you been doing since the MLB season started? Anger: Can’t you tell by the holes in your walls? Obviously, I am doing great. I have been enjoying Minnesota’s weekly Snow Storms. It’s always nice to have a few snow storms in… what month is it? August or something? Bark’s Lounge: Actually, It’s early May, but I get your point and I have noticed the holes in the wall. Thanks for that. Second question – how about the play of your Minnesota Twin’s through month #1 of the season? Anger: Their record is a lot better than I could have anticipated at this point in the season, but for the most part they have been a drag to watch. First and foremost they probably should have cancelled the first month of the season because of the god damned snow. Besides the snow-outs, the Twins have been playing like a person with a bi-polar disorder who is not taking their happy pills. For a short stretch they appear to play with a little bit of fire in their belly, but they follow that up with a stretch of disinterested and uninspiring brand of baseball that is not worth investing your time into. The s@#&*y thing about that is you never know what team is going to show up. If I hate one thing – it is inconsistency. Bark’s Lounge: Understood. What do you foresee happening for the Twins as the season progresses into the summer months? Anger: First of all let’s get through May before we start thinking about the summer. Our season might be over before we get to the “Summer”. Right now, the Twin’s offense sucks. Whether one thinks that the pitching has been good or so-so to this point of the season is irrelevant. The fact is that the starting pitching will get worse as the season progresses. The bats need to get going and going soon. There is some talent in our line-up, but so far it has fallen flat on its face. To win 70 games the offense is going to have to kick on all cylinders for good chunks of this season. Right now, it is hard for me to envision that happening. Bark’s Lounge: Who are a few of the players you have some concerns with? Anger: Individually, I care not to focus on the pitching. Our bullpen is okay, but that will change once the starters begin to fail with regularity. At that point, when the bullpen is overtaxed - the dominos of negativity will start to fall. Perkins and Burton will probably be okay… and I do think the Pressly kid is a keeper. If Pressly hits a bad stretch, I believe the Twins should stick it out with him and not offer him Back to the BoSox. He will help in the future. Bark’s Lounge: Position Players? Anger: Florimon should not be in the bigs. Doumit has looked like crap, his play is indicative of a player who has aged 5 years in the off season. Morneau has been a bit of a bummer. Most people say he is healthy and he is going to re-emerge into the elite offensive force he once was – I hope it happens, but I have some severe concerns that Morneau is on the downslide Big Time. Dozier and Hicks started off bad, especially Hicks. They have looked better recently, but to rely on them would be suicidal to one’s hopes. To be honest the only position players that have been okay are Willingham and Escobar. Willingham is doing what is expected of him and Escobar will get his wings cut off and fall back to earth. Mauer has perplexed me a bit. A week or 2 ago he was batting .400, now he is batting in the .280’s. Slumps are one thing, but I have to believe something is going haywire with his thought process when he gets up to the plate. Some may think Mauer is mentally weak because of his past injury situations and such, but I am not of that thought. I actually think he is a focused, well oiled machine when it comes to hitting. He is either physically hurt or mentally distracted. His strike-out rate to this point is simply un-Mauer like and shocking… something is amiss. Overall, I do not like the line-up. It is not gelling. Who knows, maybe it will… maybe it won’t. Either way, we have no control over it. It is what it is. Bark’s Lounge: How about…. Anger: I’m done. I’m tired of this S%@t. Bark’s Lounge: Okay? Anger: And by the way Bark. Quit taking your happy pills. I am feeling stifled and boxed in. Let me be free to roam. I am very disappointed that you have kept us in this arctic hell hole. We should have been long gone. Bark’s Lounge: If I could go back 15 years, we would have been relocated… but I cannot go back and fix it. I did stop taking my happy pills a couple days ago. Does that help? Anger: A little I guess.

Hello Twins Daily Participants, It appears fortune is on my side today as I have lined up an interview with my Anger. Some may find that a strange concept, but I very often have problems accessing certain areas of my emotional palette. My anger is a very private entity and mostly, he only shows up when I least expect it, which in turn has made my adult life an adventure, a mess and somewhat interesting - mixed together with a handful of days spent in the local detention center. Just to be clear, most of this interview will be based on Twins baseball. I wouldn’t want to abuse the privilege of using this site for non Twins related rants. Before I begin this interview, I feel the need to recognize the passing of Slayer guitarist Jeff Hanneman. Mr. Hanneman - thank you for being a huge contributing force behind the albums “Reign in Blood”, “South of Heaven”, and “Seasons in the Abyss.” Without Slayer, this interview would not be possible. For those 3 albums, Slayer was the perfect marriage between Metal and Hard Core Punk. Mr. Hanneman – your music will live on forever and you will never be forgotten. Rest in Peace my friend. Bark’s Lounge: Hello Anger. How have you been doing since the MLB season started? Anger: Can’t you tell by the holes in your walls? Obviously, I am doing great. I have been enjoying Minnesota’s weekly Snow Storms. It’s always nice to have a few snow storms in… what month is it? August or something? Bark’s Lounge: Actually, It’s early May, but I get your point and I have noticed the holes in the wall. Thanks for that. Second question – how about the play of your Minnesota Twin’s through month #1 of the season? Anger: Their record is a lot better than I could have anticipated at this point in the season, but for the most part they have been a drag to watch. First and foremost they probably should have cancelled the first month of the season because of the god damned snow. Besides the snow-outs, the Twins have been playing like a person with a bi-polar disorder who is not taking their happy pills. For a short stretch they appear to play with a little bit of fire in their belly, but they follow that up with a stretch of disinterested and uninspiring brand of baseball that is not worth investing your time into. The s@#&*y thing about that is you never know what team is going to show up. If I hate one thing – it is inconsistency. Bark’s Lounge: Understood. What do you foresee happening for the Twins as the season progresses into the summer months? Anger: First of all let’s get through May before we start thinking about the summer. Our season might be over before we get to the “Summer”. Right now, the Twin’s offense sucks. Whether one thinks that the pitching has been good or so-so to this point of the season is irrelevant. The fact is that the starting pitching will get worse as the season progresses. The bats need to get going and going soon. There is some talent in our line-up, but so far it has fallen flat on its face. To win 70 games the offense is going to have to kick on all cylinders for good chunks of this season. Right now, it is hard for me to envision that happening. Bark’s Lounge: Who are a few of the players you have some concerns with? Anger: Individually, I care not to focus on the pitching. Our bullpen is okay, but that will change once the starters begin to fail with regularity. At that point, when the bullpen is overtaxed - the dominos of negativity will start to fall. Perkins and Burton will probably be okay… and I do think the Pressly kid is a keeper. If Pressly hits a bad stretch, I believe the Twins should stick it out with him and not offer him Back to the BoSox. He will help in the future. Bark’s Lounge: Position Players? Anger: Florimon should not be in the bigs. Doumit has looked like crap, his play is indicative of a player who has aged 5 years in the off season. Morneau has been a bit of a bummer. Most people say he is healthy and he is going to re-emerge into the elite offensive force he once was – I hope it happens, but I have some severe concerns that Morneau is on the downslide Big Time. Dozier and Hicks started off bad, especially Hicks. They have looked better recently, but to rely on them would be suicidal to one’s hopes. To be honest the only position players that have been okay are Willingham and Escobar. Willingham is doing what is expected of him and Escobar will get his wings cut off and fall back to earth. Mauer has perplexed me a bit. A week or 2 ago he was batting .400, now he is batting in the .280’s. Slumps are one thing, but I have to believe something is going haywire with his thought process when he gets up to the plate. Some may think Mauer is mentally weak because of his past injury situations and such, but I am not of that thought. I actually think he is a focused, well oiled machine when it comes to hitting. He is either physically hurt or mentally distracted. His strike-out rate to this point is simply un-Mauer like and shocking… something is amiss. Overall, I do not like the line-up. It is not gelling. Who knows, maybe it will… maybe it won’t. Either way, we have no control over it. It is what it is. Bark’s Lounge: How about…. Anger: I’m done. I’m tired of this S%@t. Bark’s Lounge: Okay? Anger: And by the way Bark. Quit taking your happy pills. I am feeling stifled and boxed in. Let me be free to roam. I am very disappointed that you have kept us in this arctic hell hole. We should have been long gone. Bark’s Lounge: If I could go back 15 years, we would have been relocated… but I cannot go back and fix it. I did stop taking my happy pills a couple days ago. Does that help? Anger: A little I guess.

What about "Mr. Baseball"? That was an all-time classic. Tom Selleck was robbed that year (93 or 94) of an Academy Award. It haunts me to this day.

Ditto.

Hello again. I honestly did not think I would be able to communicate with the living up until a few weeks ago. In my adult life I embraced Atheism. When my organic nature expired on Earth, I was surprised to find that there was an after-life. Fortunately or unfortunately, my current residence is hell, under the dominion of Satan. Life in Hell is somewhat strange and I will try to explain that in this written piece. First and foremost, I would like to apologize to everyone I disrespected or mislead. My Bark’s Lounge identity was used strictly as a fictional outlet for myself to vent, create, and to have fun. I did not think that my actions were wrong while participating on this site, but the clerical staff in Hell informed me that my involvement and actions on this site were a small, but not insignificant part of my after-life sentencing. Bark’s Lounge was never living in Japan. 3 or 4 of my last posts focused on Bark’s Lounge living in Kagoshima, Japan. At the time I thought this was a fun avenue to go down and to write some fictional stories to. I understand in hindsight, I went too far with certain things and I would like to put on the record that I am not a rascist. Except for purposely writing from a Japanese Detective’s point of view and screwing up his English interpretation, which I thought was harmless, I feel like I represented appropriately, and if I did not, let it be known that I am enamored with the Japanese society and a lot of stories can be thought up because of their fun loving, unique and glorious society. My last days alive were filled with needless gambling in Vegas. I got a bit in over my head and ran into the wrong crowd. I ended up borrowing money from some top Yakuza Gangsters and was unable to pay them back in the time frame they deemed acceptable. They drowned me in their hot tub and disposed of my body in a landfill on the southern outskirts of town. When I was drowned, I felt certain that was the end. When I woke up, I found myself in a very dark, but illuminated dark space which seemed to have no beginning or end. Many physical forms would pass you by and dissolve into the darkness. It certainly was a shock, but soon I would be made aware of my predictament. Beings that I would call Satan’s Clerical Staff approached me and informed me That I was now a resident of hell. My instinct was to laugh, but that emotional reaction reached a dead end wall. In hell, there is no ability to laugh, cry, be angry, be happy, be hopeful – the best that I can describe it is as a blank, zombie like reaction to everything thrown at you. Nothing more – nothing less. In hell I was able to run into Ty Cobb and Rogers Hornsby. They were caught up in themselves and were unable to communicate with me. Kirby Puckett is also in hell with me, we chat on occasion, but he is unsure of what has happened. He never talks about baseball, but always asks me if he has been a good person. I never knew him when he was alive, but I tell him – He was a good person and he was a difference maker. It never seems to compute with him though. In hell I have found out that after 4 months of settling in, the inhabitants of hell are permitted to visit the living humans that were once important to them for 1 week, In turn it is pretty much haunting them. I did not participate, because my wife has already shacked up with a new guy and the new guy was my best friend at the time of my death. What’s the point – she is better off. I was able to watch some baseball though. What is our record 4-4? Our starting Pitching will be the hang noose of this team, but they have held their own half of the time. I am guessing we have another poor season – this sewn together pitching staff will eventually implode. On paper it looks like everyone on the offensive side of the coin can improve. Except for Escobar or Florimon, who are reaching further than their expectations. In a season of non-expectations, sometimes the cream of the lesser rises to the top. All we can do is hope, VIVA Hicks, VIVA Plouffe, VIVA Parmelee, VIVA Dozier!!! Bark's Lounge

Hello again. I honestly did not think I would be able to communicate with the living up until a few weeks ago. In my adult life I embraced Atheism. When my organic nature expired on Earth, I was surprised to find that there was an after-life. Fortunately or unfortunately, my current residence is hell, under the dominion of Satan. Life in Hell is somewhat strange and I will try to explain that in this written piece. First and foremost, I would like to apologize to everyone I disrespected or mislead. My Bark’s Lounge identity was used strictly as a fictional outlet for myself to vent, create, and to have fun. I did not think that my actions were wrong while participating on this site, but the clerical staff in Hell informed me that my involvement and actions on this site were a small, but not insignificant part of my after-life sentencing. Bark’s Lounge was never living in Japan. 3 or 4 of my last posts focused on Bark’s Lounge living in Kagoshima, Japan. At the time I thought this was a fun avenue to go down and to write some fictional stories to. I understand in hindsight, I went too far with certain things and I would like to put on the record that I am not a rascist. Except for purposely writing from a Japanese Detective’s point of view and screwing up his English interpretation, which I thought was harmless, I feel like I represented appropriately, and if I did not, let it be known that I am enamored with the Japanese society and a lot of stories can be thought up because of their fun loving, unique and glorious society. My last days alive were filled with needless gambling in Vegas. I got a bit in over my head and ran into the wrong crowd. I ended up borrowing money from some top Yakuza Gangsters and was unable to pay them back in the time frame they deemed acceptable. They drowned me in their hot tub and disposed of my body in a landfill on the southern outskirts of town. When I was drowned, I felt certain that was the end. When I woke up, I found myself in a very dark, but illuminated dark space which seemed to have no beginning or end. Many physical forms would pass you by and dissolve into the darkness. It certainly was a shock, but soon I would be made aware of my predictament. Beings that I would call Satan’s Clerical Staff approached me and informed me That I was now a resident of hell. My instinct was to laugh, but that emotional reaction reached a dead end wall. In hell, there is no ability to laugh, cry, be angry, be happy, be hopeful – the best that I can describe it is as a blank, zombie like reaction to everything thrown at you. Nothing more – nothing less. In hell I was able to run into Ty Cobb and Rogers Hornsby. They were caught up in themselves and were unable to communicate with me. Kirby Puckett is also in hell with me, we chat on occasion, but he is unsure of what has happened. He never talks about baseball, but always asks me if he has been a good person. I never knew him when he was alive, but I tell him – He was a good person and he was a difference maker. It never seems to compute with him though. In hell I have found out that after 4 months of settling in, the inhabitants of hell are permitted to visit the living humans that were once important to them for 1 week, In turn it is pretty much haunting them. I did not participate, because my wife has already shacked up with a new guy and the new guy was my best friend at the time of my death. What’s the point – she is better off. I was able to watch some baseball though. What is our record 4-4? Our starting Pitching will be the hang noose of this team, but they have held their own half of the time. I am guessing we have another poor season – this sewn together pitching staff will eventually implode. On paper it looks like everyone on the offensive side of the coin can improve. Except for Escobar or Florimon, who are reaching further than their expectations. In a season of non-expectations, sometimes the cream of the lesser rises to the top. All we can do is hope, VIVA Hicks, VIVA Plouffe, VIVA Parmelee, VIVA Dozier!!! Bark's Lounge

Hello Twin’s Daily Participants, As the representative for the family of Bark’s Lounge, after his death, I was given the task of sorting through his personal affairs and tying them up. I guess that is why I am submitting this. I suppose it is some form of closure, but this is what I am paid to do. After reading through some of the material Mr. Lounge submitted on this website, I am under the impression he was a not so well liked member of this community. A big part of my job is to be objective, but after reading some of the stuff he chose to put out there and also having access to his personal journal, I reached the conclusion that he had no business being a member of a Sport’s team based internet chat site, his mindset and personal views, in my opinion, were not a missing puzzle piece for Twin’s Daily. Mr. Lounge has definitely made some mistakes, and I would say this is on that list. His family requests that I send you their apologies. They have been concerned for him for a long time and unfortunately the thing they feared the most became a reality. In his journal, he alluded to the fact that he was not well received on this site and seemed to be regretful. My feeling is that he enjoyed baseball quite a bit, but baseball mixed with his other interests and his mode of expression were not meant to pan out for him on this site. One last note, I found this poem in Mr. Lounge’s journal. It was dated November 21, 2012. This is the note I leave upon you: Twin’s Daily An orgy of malcontents In this brackish water Too much love and hate The mix is intoxicating The hangover is consuming Pitches, hits, errors and open wounds The salt has been this past season I sense the agony in the whole The offseason manhandles us Can we be found anew?

Hello Twin’s Daily Participants, As the representative for the family of Bark’s Lounge, after his death, I was given the task of sorting through his personal affairs and tying them up. I guess that is why I am submitting this. I suppose it is some form of closure, but this is what I am paid to do. After reading through some of the material Mr. Lounge submitted on this website, I am under the impression he was a not so well liked member of this community. A big part of my job is to be objective, but after reading some of the stuff he chose to put out there and also having access to his personal journal, I reached the conclusion that he had no business being a member of a Sport’s team based internet chat site, his mindset and personal views, in my opinion, were not a missing puzzle piece for Twin’s Daily. Mr. Lounge has definitely made some mistakes, and I would say this is on that list. His family requests that I send you their apologies. They have been concerned for him for a long time and unfortunately the thing they feared the most became a reality. In his journal, he alluded to the fact that he was not well received on this site and seemed to be regretful. My feeling is that he enjoyed baseball quite a bit, but baseball mixed with his other interests and his mode of expression were not meant to pan out for him on this site. One last note, I found this poem in Mr. Lounge’s journal. It was dated November 21, 2012. This is the note I leave upon you: Twin’s Daily An orgy of malcontents In this brackish water Too much love and hate The mix is intoxicating The hangover is consuming Pitches, hits, errors and open wounds The salt has been this past season I sense the agony in the whole The offseason manhandles us Can we be found anew?

Unfortunately, last evening, while walking home from my place of employment in Kagoshima, Japan, I was ambushed by an angry gang of youthful Japanese men. I am not sure if they targeted me because I was American or if my job as a greeter at Burger King dictated that my honor was at such a low standing that it called for a good old fashion butt kicking. I must say I was intrigued by this gang… mostly their fashion and fighting style. Imagine a young Japanese man dressed as Arthur Fonzarelli with the addition of a red bandana being worn around the forehead, who possesses superb martial arts fighting skills. Although I am bruised and bloodied – I am left with an impression that leans more to the positive than the negative. Since I am fresh off a good A@% whipping, for some stupid reason it got me to thinking about Theodore Roosevelt. Teddy was a man amongst boys, the definition of a Man’s Man. He was the kind of guy who would kick the crap out of you, shoot and kill you, have your head taxidermied and hung prominently above his fireplace before he would give you a hug. I personally like hugs, but that is beside the point. What if Teddy Roosevelt was secretly cryogenically frozen in 1919 and was re-introduced to our society in 2012? What would he do? What could he do? I think I might have an answer… Teddy Roosevelt, Major League Baseball Commissioner This is what I think would happen… I think the contract structures and what the players monetarily make would change drastically. Under Teddy, I believe there would be a more than fair slotted yearly salary format based on sabremetric, guts and glory, and manliness (machismo) performance. Somehow, He would dispose of the Player’s Union. Hit batters would skyrocket and there would a bench clearing brawl every 3 days or so during the MLB season. All team personal appearance rules involving facial hair would be eliminated, closely monitored by Roosevelt himself. This essentially means that if a MLB players has anything but a mustache (long or short) would be reprimanded, fined, and forced to fix the mess that they made with their facial hair. Although the slotted salary format is strictly in place – Free Agency still exists, but with a twist. Players are discouraged to leave the teams they are currently with, but when a player’s contract expires they have the option of the status quo or entering the Free Agent Safari. The Free Agent Safari will take place on a wild life refuge in a different place of our planet yearly – with a very good chance of wildlife threat. General Managers will be the hunters, armed with rifles that fire a skin penetrating pellet with a micro chip that indicates who has been caught and at what time. The last free agent standing wins a 100M bonus and has his choice of what team he plays for. The 2nd and 3rd place finishers receive a 20M & 15M bonus, 2nd & 3rd place finishers are allowed to pick the teams they would want to play for, but that team will have to negotiate a fee under 50M or make a trade with the players current team. As for the other free agents, they will be returned to their former team respectively. Unfortunately some players will not make it out of the Free Agent Safari and no lawsuits can be filed as the players will have signed a waiver, excluding MLB and all affiliates from any wrong doing. If a general manager is killed or wounded in the Free Agent Safari – they have already signed that waiver as it is a part of their contract. Here ends my concept – I must go to bed and heal my wounds, and wake up to go to my job at Burger King tomorrow. As much as I was intrigued with the Japanese Gang the kick the crap out of me, I am hoping that there will not be a replay tomorrow – I am looking forward to an enjoyable evening at the arcade and maybe getting some hugs from the honeys! Sayonara, Bark’s Lounge[ATTACH=CONFIG]2753[/ATTACH]

Unfortunately, last evening, while walking home from my place of employment in Kagoshima, Japan, I was ambushed by an angry gang of youthful Japanese men. I am not sure if they targeted me because I was American or if my job as a greeter at Burger King dictated that my honor was at such a low standing that it called for a good old fashion butt kicking. I must say I was intrigued by this gang… mostly their fashion and fighting style. Imagine a young Japanese man dressed as Arthur Fonzarelli with the addition of a red bandana being worn around the forehead, who possesses superb martial arts fighting skills. Although I am bruised and bloodied – I am left with an impression that leans more to the positive than the negative. Since I am fresh off a good A@% whipping, for some stupid reason it got me to thinking about Theodore Roosevelt. Teddy was a man amongst boys, the definition of a Man’s Man. He was the kind of guy who would kick the crap out of you, shoot and kill you, have your head taxidermied and hung prominently above his fireplace before he would give you a hug. I personally like hugs, but that is beside the point. What if Teddy Roosevelt was secretly cryogenically frozen in 1919 and was re-introduced to our society in 2012? What would he do? What could he do? I think I might have an answer… Teddy Roosevelt, Major League Baseball Commissioner This is what I think would happen… I think the contract structures and what the players monetarily make would change drastically. Under Teddy, I believe there would be a more than fair slotted yearly salary format based on sabremetric, guts and glory, and manliness (machismo) performance. Somehow, He would dispose of the Player’s Union. Hit batters would skyrocket and there would a bench clearing brawl every 3 days or so during the MLB season. All team personal appearance rules involving facial hair would be eliminated, closely monitored by Roosevelt himself. This essentially means that if a MLB players has anything but a mustache (long or short) would be reprimanded, fined, and forced to fix the mess that they made with their facial hair. Although the slotted salary format is strictly in place – Free Agency still exists, but with a twist. Players are discouraged to leave the teams they are currently with, but when a player’s contract expires they have the option of the status quo or entering the Free Agent Safari. The Free Agent Safari will take place on a wild life refuge in a different place of our planet yearly – with a very good chance of wildlife threat. General Managers will be the hunters, armed with rifles that fire a skin penetrating pellet with a micro chip that indicates who has been caught and at what time. The last free agent standing wins a 100M bonus and has his choice of what team he plays for. The 2nd and 3rd place finishers receive a 20M & 15M bonus, 2nd & 3rd place finishers are allowed to pick the teams they would want to play for, but that team will have to negotiate a fee under 50M or make a trade with the players current team. As for the other free agents, they will be returned to their former team respectively. Unfortunately some players will not make it out of the Free Agent Safari and no lawsuits can be filed as the players will have signed a waiver, excluding MLB and all affiliates from any wrong doing. If a general manager is killed or wounded in the Free Agent Safari – they have already signed that waiver as it is a part of their contract. Here ends my concept – I must go to bed and heal my wounds, and wake up to go to my job at Burger King tomorrow. As much as I was intrigued with the Japanese Gang the kick the crap out of me, I am hoping that there will not be a replay tomorrow – I am looking forward to an enjoyable evening at the arcade and maybe getting some hugs from the honeys! Sayonara, Bark’s Lounge[ATTACH=CONFIG]2753[/ATTACH]

Incomplete Voltron – 2013 Twins and Beyond Now that I am living in Kagoshima, Japan, I have been enjoying myself – it has been quite an adventure and a culture shock. I have procured a job at a Burger King, working as a greeter dressed up as the “Burger King”. I have had better jobs in my lifetime, but overall it has been a pretty good experience. The customers have some nicknames for me, which is touching. They call me “Okuraseru” and “Akushū o hanatsu”. It is nice to feel loved and appreciated by this honorable and glorious society. I have been running into a lot of Voltron cartoons from the 1980’s. Before the last month, It has been probably 25 years since I had last seen an episode of Voltron. Being that I am in Japan and do not know Japanese, I have no idea what anyone is saying and that makes it sort of fun. Watching these Voltron episodes makes me think about the Minnesota Twins. In most Voltron episodes (using the Golion Team as an example), after enduring some touch and go battles with their nemesis, the Humanoid piloted Lion robots combine to form Voltron and save the day. Lance manned the Red Lion and Pidge manned the Green Lion. The Red and Green Lions were the arms of Voltron. If the Twins were to be compared to the Golion Voltron, they would be armless, they are without a pilot to man the Red and Green Lion. I would imagine that Zach Greinke, Anibal Sanchez or Shaun Marcum could pilot the Red or Green Lion, but they most probably have other destinations. Trades could also bring home some able pilots – such as James Shields, Jeremy Hellickson, Kris Medlen, Mike Minor or Matt Moore, but these trades would lead to us to probably having to trade one of the the pilots of the Black, Blue and Yellow Lion… thus making the Twin’s Voltron unable to form. The next three seasons for the Twin’s Voltron do not look promising. I suspect it will be 2-3 awful seasons of episodes and hopefully in the 3rd or 4th season some new recruits will have what it takes to pilot the Red and Green Lion. Sayonara, Bark’s Lounge

Incomplete Voltron – 2013 Twins and Beyond Now that I am living in Kagoshima, Japan, I have been enjoying myself – it has been quite an adventure and a culture shock. I have procured a job at a Burger King, working as a greeter dressed up as the “Burger King”. I have had better jobs in my lifetime, but overall it has been a pretty good experience. The customers have some nicknames for me, which is touching. They call me “Okuraseru” and “Akushū o hanatsu”. It is nice to feel loved and appreciated by this honorable and glorious society. I have been running into a lot of Voltron cartoons from the 1980’s. Before the last month, It has been probably 25 years since I had last seen an episode of Voltron. Being that I am in Japan and do not know Japanese, I have no idea what anyone is saying and that makes it sort of fun. Watching these Voltron episodes makes me think about the Minnesota Twins. In most Voltron episodes (using the Golion Team as an example), after enduring some touch and go battles with their nemesis, the Humanoid piloted Lion robots combine to form Voltron and save the day. Lance manned the Red Lion and Pidge manned the Green Lion. The Red and Green Lions were the arms of Voltron. If the Twins were to be compared to the Golion Voltron, they would be armless, they are without a pilot to man the Red and Green Lion. I would imagine that Zach Greinke, Anibal Sanchez or Shaun Marcum could pilot the Red or Green Lion, but they most probably have other destinations. Trades could also bring home some able pilots – such as James Shields, Jeremy Hellickson, Kris Medlen, Mike Minor or Matt Moore, but these trades would lead to us to probably having to trade one of the the pilots of the Black, Blue and Yellow Lion… thus making the Twin’s Voltron unable to form. The next three seasons for the Twin’s Voltron do not look promising. I suspect it will be 2-3 awful seasons of episodes and hopefully in the 3rd or 4th season some new recruits will have what it takes to pilot the Red and Green Lion. Sayonara, Bark’s Lounge