Local Twins Fan Furious After Dreaming Minnesota Made it to ALCS

It was a rough morning for lifelong Minnesota Twins fan Steve Halvorson, who woke up Thursday deeply frustrated after dreaming that the Twins reached the American League Championship Series.

“It felt so real,” Halvorson said, sipping a Circle K gas station coffee while staring blankly into space. “They beat the Astros in five games. Royce Lewis hit three home runs. I even bought an ALCS hoodie in the dream. Then I woke up and remembered it was October, and they finished at the bottom of the AL. I’ve never felt so betrayed by my own brain.”

Halvorson described the dream as “cruelly detailed,” including a Target Field packed with fans, Joe Mauer throwing out the first pitch, and Dan Gladden mispronouncing everyone’s name on the radio broadcast. “I swear I smelled mini donuts,” he added. “That’s how vivid it was. I think my subconscious hates me.”

Coworkers say this isn’t the first time Halvorson’s emotions have been hijacked by dream-based Twins drama.

“He came in and slammed his lunch bag on the counter like the team actually lost something,” said his coworker, Angela Peterson. “Then he spent twenty minutes explaining how the bullpen collapsed in Game 4, which, again, didn’t actually happen. I tried to tell him it was just a dream, but he said, ‘That’s exactly what the Twins would want me to believe.’”

By 10 a.m., Halvorson had reportedly composed and sent a strongly worded email to the Twins front office. According to a copy he posted on Facebook, the message began: “To whom it may concern, I am beyond disappointed in your fictional postseason performance.”

He then demanded an apology “for the emotional damage caused by dream-level playoff incompetence” and urged the team to “please consider hiring a dream psychologist for your fan base.”

Sources at Target Field confirmed they received the email, but indicated they have not yet decided whether to respond.

“We’ve dealt with passionate fans before,” said one team employee on the condition of anonymity, “but this is the first time someone’s been angry about a dream. We’re checking if that falls under community relations or mental health outreach.”

Despite the ordeal, Halvorson says he’s not giving up on the Twins, either awake or asleep.

“Next time I dream about them, I’m making sure I change the ending,” he said. “If my brain doesn’t let us win the World Series this time, I might start dreaming about the Timberwolves instead. At least there, disappointment feels normal.”