https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/page/9/?d=1News: Minnesota Twins Satireenhttps://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/teres-major-what-to-know-about-muscle-that-hates-your-favorite-team-r18446/Chances are, you'd never heard of the teres major until it ended Joe Ryan’s season last year. Now, after just barely putting that nightmare behind you, the same injury to the same muscle is sidelining Pablo López for most of the summer. What gives? Here’s all we know about this heretof...18446Fri, 06 Jun 2025 12:21:01 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/twins-win-the-trade-kody-clemens-outperforms-cash-considerations-by-slight-margin-r18389/In a deal that initially flew under the radar, the Minnesota Twins acquired utility man Kody Clemens from the Philadelphia Phillies earlier this season in exchange for journeyman financial asset Cash Considerations. At the time, the move was met with shrugs. Now, it’s being met with "Did they re...18389Tue, 03 Jun 2025 15:03:01 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/royce-lewiss-slump-traced-to-his-evil-twin-groyce-r18399/The end of Royce Lewis’s 2024 season and beginning of his 2025 season were thought to have two things in common: Injuries and underperformance. In a startling development revealed on Thursday, there’s now a third thing: Groyce Lewis, Royce’s evil twin brother, who replaced the latter someti...18399Fri, 30 May 2025 12:14:02 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/twins-fans-still-skeptical-of-strong-starting-pitching-citing-matt-shoemaker-ptsd-r18368/MINNEAPOLIS—In a shocking turn of events that defies decades of trauma, the Minnesota Twins’ starting rotation has once again shown signs of being competent—maybe even good. Naturally, this has led a certain segment of the fanbase to descend into full denial, clutching their Bert Blyleven bobble...18368Thu, 29 May 2025 14:15:01 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/next-final-destination-movie-said-to-revolve-around-the-minnesota-twins-r18383/With the tremendous box office success of Final Destination: Bloodlines, the newest installment of the popular horror-thriller franchise, it appears Hollywood is readying itself for another trip around the block. Warner Bros. is reportedly considering another chapter in the coming years, one tha...18383Wed, 28 May 2025 14:17:01 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/kodys-rekonsidered-r18356/Unexpected things happen in baseball. The Minnesota Twins are not immune to it. Indeed, they have too many to name in one blog. A smattering off the top of my head: A palm ball merchant named Tony Fiore throws absolute slop, posts double-digit victories, finishes 8th in Rookie of the Yea...18356Fri, 23 May 2025 11:23:01 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/enter-the-codyverse-clemens-credits-cody-collective-of-twins-territory-for-success-r18349/Since being acquired in a low-wattage trade in late April, Kody Clemens has emerged as a central figure in the team’s torrid May turnaround. Previously a fringe big-leaguer best known for being Roger’s kid, Clemens has hit .318 with a 1.070 OPS and delivered multiple game-changing home runs in t...18349Thu, 22 May 2025 14:03:00 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/twins-announce-%E2%80%9Cheritage-rotation%E2%80%9D-week-r18338/Minneapolis–They say hindsight is 20/20, so this week, the Twins are literally pitching with yesterday’s stars. Well, maybe not stars, but at least they are functional arms. In a move part corporate wellness, part time-travel experiment, Minnesota today unveiled “Heritage Rotation Week,” a bold...18338Tue, 20 May 2025 14:13:01 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/are-the-chicago-white-sox-still-godless-experts-weigh-in-r18309/This season started like any other for the godless Chicago White Sox: a 4-16 start, general apathy, poor attendance, and our country’s prison system and adult video superstores overrun with fans of the squalid franchise. But two major developments have left many wondering just how godless this h...18309Fri, 16 May 2025 13:10:02 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/five-injured-in-pile-up-begun-by-runaway-twins-bandwagon-r18302/The recent turnaround to the Twins’ season is turning heads, not only from their fans, but from the rubber-neckers passing by the site of a recent crash involving the team’s bandwagon. “There were just so many people jumping on that thing now that the club has found their groove,” said one...18302Thu, 15 May 2025 13:29:02 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/miguel-san%C3%B3-returns-twins-add-former-slugger-to-make-everyone-else-look-more-disciplined-r18285/[Ed. note: This is a satirical piece! Miguel Sanó has not actually re-signed with the Twins. Ideally, we wouldn't have to clarify this further than by using our Satire frame around the article, but this one runs a certain risk of being taken seriously and reacted to enormously. So, we'd like to...18285Tue, 13 May 2025 14:08:01 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/pohlads-water-down-press-box-ranch-dressing-r18271/Phil Miller noticed right away. “I dunked a chicken strip in the ranch, expecting some of the dip to adhere to the strip,” said the Minnesota Star-Tribune Twins beat writer. “It simply ran right off. It barely even wetted the strip.” Was this a sub-standard batch of ranch? A new cateri...18271Fri, 09 May 2025 13:06:01 +0000