https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/page/32/?d=1News: Minnesota Twins Satireenhttps://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/nasa-newly-discovered-asteroid-will-%E2%80%98definitely%E2%80%99-land-on-byron-buxton-r10936/When NASA astronomer Steve Bland observed a new asteroid hurtling through space earlier this month, he was alarmed. The object was clearly on a path that would send it directly towards Earth. “Obviously, that’s a nightmare scenario,” said Bland. “Even a relatively small object could wreak havoc...10936Fri, 25 Jun 2021 13:02:00 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/hrbek-confirms-hoagies-not-on-banned-substances-list-r10906/After a spirited series of phone calls, emails, and at least one in-person visit to the league office, former Minnesota Twins great Kent Hrbek announced Thursday that delicious, overstuffed hoagies are not on Major League Baseball’s banned substances list. “This is a victory for the Twins a...10906Fri, 18 Jun 2021 09:45:00 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/rocco-baldelli-urges-team-to-%E2%80%98get-into%E2%80%99-steely-dan-r10878/With the 2021 season rapidly slipping away, Twins manager Rocco Baldelli needed to do something. With making the team healthier being out of his hands, he did what he thought best: put on some Steely Dan. “I think the players-only meetings and office sit-downs only accomplish so much,” said...10878Fri, 11 Jun 2021 04:03:00 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/the-kansas-city-road-trip-journal-r10862/I’ve always thought of Kansas City as an underrated road trip destination for Twin Cities folks, and it seems that most people don’t realize that it takes roughly the same amount of time as driving to Chicago (6 hours, 15 minutes give or take) and only an hour more than Milwaukee. This time arou...10862Tue, 08 Jun 2021 01:55:02 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/tenth-twins-player-on-injured-list-triggers-valuable-savings-r10843/Caleb “Meat Raffle” Thielbar landed on the Minnesota Twins injured list Thursday with a strained groin, joining Byron Buxton, Mitch Garver, Kenta Maeda, Max Kepler, Luis Arraez, Devin Smeltzer, Rob Refsnyder, Jake Cave, and Edwar Colina. While this staggering list of casualties is alarming for b...10843Fri, 04 Jun 2021 10:37:03 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/off-day-allows-twins-fan-to-convince-himself-season-isn%E2%80%99t-lost-r10813/Thursday’s off day allowed the battered Minnesota Twins 24 valuable hours of rest. What it did for the fan base was perhaps even more critical. “You know, they’re only nine games below .500,” said Ethan Adams. “Not even ten games out of first, either. Put together one more good week and now...10813Fri, 28 May 2021 07:00:02 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/rare-unwritten-rule-triggers-name-change-for-minnesota-twins-r10784/When the Minnesota Twins took the field against the Los Angeles Angels for the second half of Thursday’s doubleheader, they technically weren’t the Minnesota Twins. In the latest twist involving baseball’s unwritten rules and the franchise, the road team was officially the Cocaine Dentists....10784Fri, 21 May 2021 07:52:00 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/twins-bring-on-bob-baffert-in-consultant-role-r10749/With the Minnesota Twins 2021 season on the precipice of disaster, the team’s front office made it clear that they are willing to think outside the box in their efforts to salvage it. Bob Baffert, the scandal-ridden trainer of champion racehorses, has been brought on as a consultant and ass...10749Fri, 14 May 2021 06:47:01 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/state-of-minnesota-relaxes-guidelines-for-yelling-at-twins-r10723/Citing increased vaccination rates and falling COVID numbers, Minnesota Governor Tim Walz announced new metrics for roasting the hell out of the Minnesota Twins. “I’m incredibly proud of the work Minnesotans have done in getting us to this point,” said Walz. “The epic failure of the Minnesota Twin...10723Fri, 07 May 2021 12:23:00 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/local-contrarian-quietly-deletes-39zach-granite-is-what-byron-buxton-hopes-to-be39-tweet-r10692/On Thursday, Barry Daniel made the hard decision to delete an August 2017 tweet with a claim that even he could no longer defend. The tweet read “Face it, Twins apologists: Zach Granite is what Byron Buxton hopes to be. Deal with it. Sorry not sorry. #byronbuston.” The tweet also contained a GIF o...10692Fri, 30 Apr 2021 11:50:00 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/baffling-twins-losses-cause-vikings-to-issue-cease-and-desist-order-r10671/The befuddling run of brain-scrambling Minnesota Twins losses has caused a lot of consternation among the team’s fans. It’s also caught the eye of the state’s professional football team. And not in a good way. “When Minnesota’s sports teams falter in a style that mixes cosmic ineptitude, shattered...10671Fri, 23 Apr 2021 13:53:00 +0000https://twinsdaily.com/news-rumors/just-for-fun/twins-bullpen-falters-because-of-what-bryan-did-r10643/As Hansel Robles and Taylor Rogers surrendered another Minnesota lead on Thursday, Twins fans were up in arms. Did the Twins pull Michael Pineda one inning too soon? Was Robles the right call to start the eighth? Does a higher power hate the Minnesota Twins? While valid questions, multiple sources...10643Fri, 16 Apr 2021 11:48:00 +0000