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Article: Game Thread: Twins @ Padres, 8/1@9:10pm CT


It’s a little two-game series with the Padres starting tonight. The trade deadline has passed. Watching the Twins operate this year has been both exciting and not exciting at the same time. Some deals made and some interesting prospects acquired yet nobody that blows the roof off the place. You never know how trades are going to work out so we will have to wait and see.

I, myself, once traded my car for an actual polar bear. I did the research and at the time a polar bear was $100,000 in value while my car had 100,000 miles on it so it was a no brainer. The truck shows up and drops the bear off at my house. The neighbors started complaining immediately. I had to build an enclosure because as it turned out the bear was pretty strong so the rope and stake that worked for my dog wasn't getting it done. You would be surprised at the cost of seal meat and how much they eat and how much there was to clean up after. Worst of all… the bear didn't like to be hugged at all and those claws are real. I tried to give the bear a hug and it sliced me pretty good and I had to walk to the emergency room bleeding terribly because I had traded my car.

Here are some things to think about:

 

1. San Diego – The city is classy and kind of a big deal; things also can escalate quickly there. Men and Women have argued about what the name "San Diego" means but the truth is… the name was chosen by Sandy Duncan trying to claim ownership of her Eggo when someone else wouldn’t let go of it. The city demographics are 57% sailor, 37% surfer with the remaining 16% zookeepers, because of all the animal exhibits. Now that the Chargers have left for Los Angeles… San Diego is left with three quarters of a professional franchise. It’s the Padres so I can’t go full franchise.

2. Our Twins – The big question is who is going to close the games now that Brandon Kintzler has been traded to the Nationals. A bigger question still… Why are the holes in cat fur always the right size for their eyes?

3. The Padres – The big question is will this organization ever stabilize under A.J. Preller. Ever since he took over the GM duties they have made sweeping change after sweeping change. I think he is one of those guys who just gets bored easily. Boredom for most people leads to origami… for Preller it leads to players calling real estate agents in other towns.

Download attachment: Joe M.jpg
4. Today’s Joe M Conversation:

Morgan: Are we just going to sit here? Does anybody have anything planned?

Maddon: Oh… we have plans… big plans.

Mauer: Yep… every trade deadline we celebrate by trading stuff.

McCarthy: I’ll start… I have here a bottle of sand. Who wants it and what will you
give me for it?

Montana: I’ve got 3 bananas.

McCarthy: Make it 4

Montana: Deal

Morgan: What are you going to do with that sand?

Montana: I’m building a beach in my bathroom… it’ll come in handy.

Mauer: You mean… it'll come in sandy!

Maddon: How about a cat? His name is Jerry… I got this cat for my wife.

Morgan: You got that cat for your wife?

McCarthy: Now that’s a great trade.

5. Movie Night – My wife and I went to the movies last night. I like to hold hands at the movies… turns out that the stranger sitting next to me… does not.
____________________

Lineups:

TWINS
Brian Dozier 2B
Max Kepler RF
Miguel Sano 3B
Joe Mauer 1B
Eduardo Escobar SS
Zack Granite LF
Byron Buxton CF
Jason Castro
Jose Berrios P

PADRES
Manuel Margot CF
Carlos Asuaje 2B
Jose Pirela LF
Yangervis Solarte SS
Wil Myers 1B
Cory Spangenberg 3B
Hunter Renfroe RF
Austin Hedges C
Jhoulys Chacin P

Weather: Mostly cloudy, 73 deg F, winds at 6mph from the SW, a small-ish chance of rain/thunderstorms.

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I was planning on going to Petco, a stadium I had not seen yet and been to a ballgame at,  but after attending the Dodger series and having to watch Colon, and then watching the Twins blow the games to a last place team in Oakland, being deprived of getting to see Buxton, watching Dozier pout  ......... I have convinced myself to see Petco some other time.

 

I may still go. It is a real sickness.

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I was planning on going to Petco, a stadium I had not seen yet and been to a ballgame at,  but after attending the Dodger series and having to watch Colon, and then watching the Twins blow the games to a last place team in Oakland, being deprived of getting to see Buxton, watching Dozier pout  ......... I have convinced myself to see Petco some other time.

 

I may still go. It is a real sickness.

 

Go

 

Scratch the stadium of your list.

 

 

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1. San Diego – The city is classy and kind of a big deal, things also can escalate quickly there. Men and Women have argued about what the name San Diego means but the truth is… the name was chosen by Sandy Duncan trying to claim ownership of her Eggo when someone else wouldn’t let go of it. 

Ron Burgundy agrees to disagree.

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Hey Riverbrain, could you tell that bear to let go of that guy's neck

 

Since the OP put that picture on their it's fair game.  Who in their right mind would put their head or neck in a bears mouth?  That bear could pop his head off like a champagne cork in a heart beat.  

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Since the OP put that picture on their it's fair game.  Who in their right mind would put their head or neck in a bears mouth?  That bear could pop his head off like a champagne cork in a heart beat.  

Why does anyone do life or death stunts? The ADRENALIN RUSH IS SO DAMN GOOD! ;)

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Don't anybody else move there - the place is apparently overcrowded! (Unless maybe 10% live in La Jolla.)

 

I get the math wrong on purpose just to see if anybody is reading it. 

 

However... I've gone to that well so often that very few question such things anymore. 

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Since the OP put that picture on their it's fair game.  Who in their right mind would put their head or neck in a bears mouth?  That bear could pop his head off like a champagne cork in a heart beat.  

 

Standard Answer: Because it's there

 

Another Possible Consideration. Maybe he didn't do it on purpose. Maybe the polar bear has control of the situation. 

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"I throw baseballs on thursday."  Trevor May

 

 

 

Whoop de do! I throw people off my trail every day of the week. I also throw a fit whenever the Twins bullpen blows a game.

 

Oh, wait a minute... That Trevor May!

 

Atta boy, Trevor! Chuck 'em in there Big Fella!

 

 

 

 

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