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Game Thread: Twins vs. Red Sox 12:10 am GMT 6/19/2018

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#1 diehardtwinsfan

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Posted 18 June 2018 - 06:49 PM

Welcome to tonight’s game thread where the three people that tune in to watch the game will be treated to what most certainly will be the battle of the aces. Our Twinkies will bring their young and up-in-coming ace Jose Berrios to the mound to face the established Red Sox ace of Chris Sale. It’s a classic David vs. Goliath, except that our offense of late has made most pitchers look like Chris Sale. I hate to think what they can make Chris Sale look like. Could the strike out record be in play here? Kerry Wood, Roger Clemens*, and Max Scherzer all hold the record at 20Ks in a game. Fortunately for the Twins, Sano and Buxton won’t be in the lineup, so Sale won’t be assured of 6 or so Ks on about 20 total pitches before the game starts. That said, gamethreaders need to be on a strikeout watch. My proposal: a shot of your favourite bourbon each time Sale notches a K.

 

Things to think about:

 

Denial – Sano cannot be in Fort Myers. It’s not possible that the Twins hitters are this bad. That cannot be a home run, it was too high. Donald Trump and Bill Clinton treat women with the utmost respect.

 

Anger – I hate the Red Sox. I hate the White Sox. I hate the Yankees, instant replay, the unbalanced schedule, and the DH. I hate Falvine. I hate the Pohlads. Why do they have to run this team that I somehow manage to still care for? 

 

Bargaining – There’s always next year. Let’s restock the cupboards. I’m looking forward to Vanimal’s used car threads at the end of July. Should be a good one. Lance Lynn for Forrest Whitley. You heard it here. Dozier to the Dodgers for catching prospect Will Smith.We might have to throw in Rodney to make it work, but LA eats ALL The cash.

 

Depression – I looked at standings, and I’m looking at my life. It’s kind of like the Twins’ season right now. Uninspiring. Sano really is in Fort Myers. He’s never coming back. Buxton will never learn how to hit. Polanco’s season last year was all a drug-induced hallucination. Nothing will ever be the same. The Twins will never again win a ring.

 

Rest in Peace 2018 Minnesota Twins Season – OK, I’ll admit to doing a similar theme last year, and then they went on to make it to game 163… so perhaps this is a reverse jinx. Or perhaps I’m still in denial. I think there’s a paradox forming here.

 

There, I’ve said it. Kubler-Ross, for what it’s worth was named by Twins outfielder robbie gROSSman after facing Indian’s ace Corey Kubler… It has something to do with Robbie’s approach towards Kubler given his career .400 ish OPS… or at least, that’s what I’m going with. Sounds better than some academic nerds with psychology backgrounds.

 

Lineups TBD.

 

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#2 sampleSizeOfOne

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 11:03 AM

Distracted by softball this afternoon.

Fortunately anyone discussing local sports ball round me should also be referring to this game, which usually isn't he case...

#3 ashburyjohn

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 11:43 AM

I took the liberty of editing the thread title to say "vs." instead of "@", since the Twins are nowhere near my neck of the woods this game.

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#4 Nine of twelve

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 12:24 PM

The term Greenwich Mean Time (GMT) has been superseded by the term Coordinated Universal Time (UTC). It's the same thing on the clock, though. But that's not the big error. The big error is that tonight's game starts at 12:10 AM UTC, 6/20/2018.

Edited by Nine of twelve, 19 June 2018 - 12:30 PM.

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#5 Han Joelo

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 12:26 PM

It may be time to change your handle to "diehardertwinsfan" or even "diaanotherdaytwinsfan"--that went from gallows humor to just gallows pretty fast! I feel your pain though, but I won't take that bourbon challenge. Too rich for my blood.
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#6 Hosken Bombo Disco

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 12:51 PM

Five stages of a no hitter:

 

  • 1. Early innings
  • 2. Middle innings
  • 3. Late innings
  • 4. Last inning
  • 5. Last hitter

 

giphy.gif

 

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#7 Craig Arko

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 01:00 PM

With all that pent up anger and hatred, perhaps it's time to find a new and better hobby. Something easier on the nerves, like, say, Twitter.

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#8 sampleSizeOfOne

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 01:13 PM

Sasquatch is real, by the way...
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#9 USAFChief

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 02:43 PM

Three June games still needing a game thread vol:

 

6/22, 6/29, and 6/30.

 

Plenty of July opportunities as well.

 

Do it! Do it NOW!

 

arnold-schwarzenegger-gif-18.gif

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#10 wsnydes

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 03:02 PM

 

Five stages of a no hitter:

 

  • 1. Early innings
  • 2. Middle innings
  • 3. Late innings
  • 4. Last inning
  • 5. Last hitter

 

giphy.gif

So simple.Why are these so hard to accomplish?I mean, five easy steps!Nothing to it!

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#11 gil4

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 03:17 PM

 

Five stages of a no hitter:

 

  • 1. Early innings
  • 2. Middle innings
  • 3. Late innings
  • 4. Last inning
  • 5. Last hitter

 

giphy.gif

 

 

So simple.Why are these so hard to accomplish?I mean, five easy steps!Nothing to it!

Those all sound like coin-flip propositions.The odds of heads coming up 5 times in a row is 1/32. Therefore, our pitchers should be throwing 5 no-hitters a year. I think we need to fire the pitching coach.

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#12 ThejacKmp

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 03:39 PM

Woof. That's an ugly looking lineup. Woof.

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#13 Hosken Bombo Disco

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 03:40 PM

 

Those all sound like coin-flip propositions.The odds of heads coming up 5 times in a row is 1/32. Therefore, our pitchers should be throwing 5 no-hitters a year. I think we need to fire the pitching coach.

And five other games with no-hitters going down to the last batter.

 

 

/no more math...

Edited by Hosken Bombo Disco, 19 June 2018 - 03:42 PM.

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#14 ThejacKmp

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 03:41 PM

I always thought that the Twins had Chris Sale's number (as much as one can have Chris Sale's number). They are one of the top large-enough-sample teams (#4 in OPS) but the three teams ahead of them are the rest of the AL Central. Who knew that Chris Sale wasn't "good" in the division?

 

I guess it's better when we get to ERA. He has a 4.21 ERA against the Twins with only Cleveland (4.78) higher. Hopefully the trend continues and we get good Berrios.

Edited by ThejacKmp, 19 June 2018 - 03:43 PM.

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#15 Hosken Bombo Disco

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 03:42 PM

 

Woof. That's an ugly looking lineup. Woof.

I agree - since Ortiz retired, the Sox are just not the same :) 

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#16 ThejacKmp

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 03:45 PM

 

I agree - since Ortiz retired, the Sox are just not the same :)

 

Ha.

 

Adrianza sixth is scary to see.


#17 70charger

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 04:23 PM

You threw me with that Greenwich time, seeing as I have tickets tonight.
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#18 USAFChief

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 04:37 PM

 

Those all sound like coin-flip propositions.The odds of heads coming up 5 times in a row is 1/32. Therefore, our pitchers should be throwing 5 no-hitters a year. I think we need to fire the pitching coach.

pfft. We're aiming to be average?

 

I want more than that. 7 or 8 per year.

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#19 VATwinsFan

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 04:45 PM

I've never really hated the Red Sox.I remember the Twins consistently beating the snot out of them in the 60s.

 

Except for that unpleasant weekend at the end of the '67 season of course.

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#20 VATwinsFan

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Posted 19 June 2018 - 04:50 PM

Hey look!!The Red Sox catcher, first baseman, third baseman, left fielder, and center fielder all have lower BAs than ours.