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Game Thread: Twins@Jays 6/10 6:07PM

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#1 Riverbrian

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 02:54 PM

Weather Forecast: I don't know... It's 100 percent Canadian and they suck at predicting the weather. Last time I went up to Winnipeg the forecast said 22. I brought a coat and it was a nice day. Let's just say they missed it by about 50 degrees. I complained to a native Canadian about it and he just shook his head and laughed. Clearly they have learned to laugh off such every day meteorological mistakes.

Twins SP: Kevin Correia

1. Santana CF
2. Dozier 2B
3. Mauer 1B
4. Willingham LF
5. Morales DH
6. Arcia RF
7. Nunez 3B
8. Suzuki C
9. Escobar SS

Blue Jays SP: JA Happ

1. Reyes SS
2. Cabrera LF
3. Bautista RF
4. Encarnacion 1B
5. Lind DH
6. Lawrie 2B
7. Navarro C
8. Francisco 3B
9. Gose CF

Things to Think About:

1. The Rubberband -- Without a microscope I can't determine if the rubber band is still intact. 4 games under .500 is stretching it more than it's been stretched this year and it's clear that it will need some relief. Kendrys Morales was signed as a rubber band fixer. It's amazing how much you can make as a rubber band fixer.

2. Kevin Correia -- I'm just speculating but here is what my gut is telling me:
A. I had plenty to eat for lunch.
B. I need to do some sit ups.
C. Justin Beiber hasn't quite reached adulthood yet.
D. George Strait will probably un-retire in the future
E. Kevin Correia is probably pitching tonight for the right to stay in the rotation.

I don't think that Correia should be tossed aside just yet. If you need to... put him in the bullpen... We have no idea what kind of depth issues we will be facing going forward and we have no idea what the AAA pitchers will produce... any of them... BUT we do know that Correia has been struggling and that Trevor May is doing pretty well in Rochester. With both pitchers going tonight... They are matched up and if Correia struggles and May hangs a zero or close to... ???????????????????????????????? We just signed Morales... the Temptation would have to be high.

3. J.A. Happ -- His real name is James Anthony but he chooses to go by J.A. and he chooses to pronounce J.A... "Jay". So... He was able to walk his given name down from James Anthony to Jay in 3 steps. He calls his fastball "Faba and his Curve ball "Cuba" His Dog is named Byron Torii and is called By-Tor. When a reporter asked why he changed his named to J.A... He responded "I di no ch my na... I ju ca prno it". He's 31 years old and he was born in Peru... Yeah I know that sounds like one of my goofy jokes... but yeah... look it up... he was actually born in Peru. Fortunately for J.A... All of Peru was moved to Illinois (that might be one of my goofy jokes). He attended Northwestern and majored in History. This strong history education has provided him with a keen understanding that his ERA has sucked in historical comparison with others since 2011. He's left handed and that means he throws like a girl. I've seen him pitch a few times and he stunk each time. He was constantly up in the zone and I hope that continues.

4. Trevor May -- I still have not seen him pitch... Not once. I can't say if he's a quality major league pitcher or if he isn't... I look forward to eventually seeing him pitch in the majors and that time may be coming soon. Hopefully he doesn't put too much pressure on himself in Rochester today and just goes out and throws the type of game that makes everyone say. Alright... we gotta bring him up.

5. The Key to Happiness - People say that Money isn't the key to happiness. I'm pretty sure that this was said by someone who has money because if you don't have money... nobody listens to you and writes that stuff down. All in all... I think it's basically true. Money and happiness are two separate pursuits. But... I do know this... If I go to Cold Stone Creamery and I want Ice Cream and If I reach into my wallet and it's empty. I'm not happy when I walk out the door without ice cream. I also believe that if you are going to be miserable. I think it's better to have money and be miserable then not have money and be miserable. I've just checked my wallet... I have enough money to buy some ice cream. I'm happy!!!

Edited by Riverbrian, 10 June 2014 - 03:00 PM.

A Skeleton walks into a bar and says... "Give me a beer... And a mop".

#2 Halsey Hall

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 03:41 PM

Nice to see Plouffe sit.

#3 jokin

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 03:49 PM

Nice to see Plouffe sit.


Yup, and Dozier needs one even worse.

#4 Hosken Bombo Disco

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 04:01 PM

RBI machine batting third again. :)

#5 Winston Smith

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 04:51 PM

6. Thinking of the rubber band. SI says the Twins have a 9% chance to make the playoffs. A rubber band is what 1/4 in wide but they are in Canada so we need to convert into mm which would be .635 mm but only 9% remains so 9% of .635 equals .057 mm and I'm in Mn. so I have to convert back to inches which equals .0022 inches which is about the thickness of a thread which is what we are hanging by. It all checks out.

When I looked for a pictures of Twins hanging by a thread I got this:
http://t0.gstatic.co...dmgItXCSsgaeuDQ
Works for me!

May all our prospects be All Stars and the beer be free.


#6 Kwak

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:05 PM

Junk balling LHP--and Hicks sits? He has moved from the doghouse to jail.

#7 Riverbrian

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:05 PM

6. Thinking of the rubber band. SI says the Twins have a 9% chance to make the playoffs. A rubber band is what 1/4 in wide but they are in Canada so we need to convert into mm which would be .635 mm but only 9% remains so 9% of .635 equals .057 mm and I'm in Mn. so I have to convert back to inches which equals .0022 inches which is about the thickness of a thread which is what we are hanging by. It all checks out.

When I looked for a pictures of Twins hanging by a thread I got this:
http://t0.gstatic.co...dmgItXCSsgaeuDQ
Works for me!


Yeah... It would be a shame if those threads snap.
A Skeleton walks into a bar and says... "Give me a beer... And a mop".

#8 Riverbrian

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:07 PM

Gardenhire Record 1,027-980

If we lost 47 games in a row... That'd be a heavy duty rubberband.
A Skeleton walks into a bar and says... "Give me a beer... And a mop".

#9 Tibs

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:08 PM

Junk balling LHP--and Hicks sits? He has moved from the doghouse to jail.

I read that he hurt his back
I couldn't be a player because of bad eyesight, so I decided to be an umpire instead.

#10 sampleSizeOfOne

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:09 PM

5. The Key to (J.A.) Happ-iness


Hit the ball! Hard.

Thanks as always for the write-up!

#11 Tibs

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:10 PM

Dozier!!!
I couldn't be a player because of bad eyesight, so I decided to be an umpire instead.

#12 JB_Iowa

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:10 PM

I read that he hurt his back


Sore shoulder from catch the other day. Back to TC for evaluation tomorrow (I think).

#13 Riverbrian

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:10 PM

[size=5]​dozier[/size]
A Skeleton walks into a bar and says... "Give me a beer... And a mop".

#14 sampleSizeOfOne

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:10 PM

Well, that's the way to start...

#15 Tibs

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:11 PM

This will probably be in its own thread:
[COLOR=#292F33][FONT=Helvetica Neue]Mike Berardino ‏[COLOR=#B1BBC3]@[/COLOR]MikeBerardino 7m[/FONT][/COLOR]
[COLOR=#292F33][FONT=Helvetica Neue]Mike Pelfrey had surgery on his right elbow to relieve pressure on his ulnar nerve. Recovery period said to be anywhere from 2-4 months.[/FONT][/COLOR]
I couldn't be a player because of bad eyesight, so I decided to be an umpire instead.

#16 CRArko

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:11 PM

I read that he hurt his back


Shoulder. He can't throw, and the DH spot is now spoken for. Sounds like if he's not better tomorrow he may be DL'd, and Fuld is looking about ready to return.
Stonehenge. It's not just for breakfast any more.
http://io9.com/archa...-sto-1632927903

#17 Tibs

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:11 PM

Sore shoulder from catch the other day. Back to TC for evaluation tomorrow (I think).

Oh yeah that's what I read. Not sure why I said back
I couldn't be a player because of bad eyesight, so I decided to be an umpire instead.

#18 JB_Iowa

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:11 PM




#19 Riverbrian

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:14 PM

Hit the ball! Hard.

Thanks as always for the write-up!


I'm so disappointed in myself that I failed to tie Happ with Happiness. It was actually coincidental and I didn't catch the coincidence.

I also forgot my key fob this morning... I usually keep it my pocket. My neighbor thought I was humping my car trying to get in it.
A Skeleton walks into a bar and says... "Give me a beer... And a mop".

#20 JB_Iowa

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:16 PM

Morris: Get the team right back in the dugout.

Correia's problems don't seem to start until about the 2nd time through the line-up.

#21 Guest_USAFChief_*

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:16 PM

Morales now 1-4. Just like the Twins to go out and sign a .250 hitter with no power.

#22 stringer bell

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:18 PM

Nice to see Plouffe sit.

I gotta remember, you're not a fan are you?

#23 howeda7

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:18 PM

Morales now 1-4. Just like the Twins to go out and sign a .250 hitter with no power.


Amen. They could screw up a 2 car parade. :s-chainsaw:

#24 howeda7

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:21 PM

Corriea pitches: "Drilled to..." can we just make it stop now?

#25 Gibby

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:21 PM

So how many more time do we run this loser out there?

#26 Riverbrian

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:21 PM

I gotta remember, you're not a fan are you?


I know I was very concerned but I've been happy this year with Plouffe. He's been much more mobile defensively and much more disciplined at the plate. I'd like to some more power but I ain't complaining anymore.
A Skeleton walks into a bar and says... "Give me a beer... And a mop".

#27 stringer bell

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:22 PM

Morris: Get the team right back in the dugout.

Correia's problems don't seem to start until about the 2nd time through the line-up.

Look out, the Jays might prove you wrong.

#28 howeda7

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:22 PM

So how many more time do we run this loser out there?


Well, we're paying him big $$ and whatnot...

#29 longstrangetrip

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:22 PM

Lots of Dominicans in the lineup, and they all hit the crap out of KC...I don't see him getting through the 4th unfortunately. That first hit was a cannon shot!

#30 howeda7

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Posted 10 June 2014 - 05:23 PM

Lots of Dominicans in the lineup, and they all hit the crap out of KC...


Racist!