Game Thread: Twins v Cleveland in Puerto Rico, 4/17 6:10pm CT
Image courtesy of © Peter Casey-USA TODAY Sports1. Top Non-Trump News Story (Or Stories):
Netflix announced today that they added 7.4 million subscribers in Q1 which comfortably beat projections of 6.6 million. The Society for Social Interaction also announced today that 7.4 million less people left their homes in Q1. 7.4 million less people attended sporting events, church, nightclubs and outdoor activities because they were binge watching every episode of “The Office” and “Orange is the New Black” for the 22nd time.
2. Our Twins:
I don’t know… I got nothing to report on the Twins. They haven’t played in 4 days… I don’t know who is hot or who is cold and I don’t think the players know either… they haven’t played in 4 days. Now… I do expect an illness issue to develop in the club house because the players spent multiple days in below-freezing temperatures, capped off by a weekend of a strong winter blizzard, followed by a quick flight to the Caribbean and upper 80-degree temps. The American Medical Association strongly advises against quick temperature changes because it can lead to illness, specifically people turning into werewolves. If you have ever wondered why so many baseball players have long, nasty-looking beards. That is why… they have turned into werewolves going from spring training to northern cities. Yep… that’s right. Dallas Keuchel is a werewolf. Now you all understand why.
If this was a week ago… my first sentence could have been about how the Indians offense is really struggling. However… it’s not a week ago and the Cleveland has been heating up at the plate. Time can really suck sometimes.
4. Today’s Joe M Conversation:
McCarthy: Guys… I have a serious question to ask all you. Give it some thought before you answer.
Morgan: Alright… shoot
McCarthy: What is your biggest concern about the future?
Maddon: That’s easy… I am very worried that there will be no post offices in the future.
Mauer: A massive meteor crashing into the forests around Bemidji, setting off a massive fire that blots out the sun, killing all plant…
Morgan: I’m not worried about global warming at all…
Mauer: That wouldn’t be global warm…
Morgan: I’m worried that Pete Rose will never make the Hall of Fame.
Montana: I’m worried that Mauer will stop paying for everything.
McCarthy: Amen to that.
5. Rain Dancing:
This past weekend, I did a lot of research on rain dances. The Twins weren’t playing so I had to do something. Anyway, what I discovered was quite interesting. Some rain dancers are rarely successful while some are very successful. The most successful rain dancers in the study had degrees in meteorology.
Francisco Lindor(S) SS
Jason Kipnis(L) 2B
Jose Ramirez(S) 3B
Michael Brantley(L) LF
Edwin Encarnacion(R ) DH
Yonder Alonso(L) 1B
Yan Gomes(R ) C
Tyler Naquin(L) RF
Bradley Zimmer(L) CF
Corey Kluber(R ) P
Brian Dozier(R ) 2B
Joe Mauer(L) 1B
Miguel Sano(R ) 3B
Eddie Rosario(L) LF
Logan Morrison(L) DH
Eduardo Escobar(S) SS
Max Kepler(L) CF
Robbie Grossman(S) RF
Jason Castro(L) C
Jake Odorizzi(R ) P
Game-time forecast: Mostly cloudy, but it's not going to rain (or snow), 75 deg F, winds at 9mph from the ENE.
- Puckett34, DocBauer, Dave The Dastardly and 1 other like this